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The mother of a victim of the Itaewon tragedy who held the hand of a reporter who came to the mortuary and said, "Eat and go."
Behind her thin body was a portrait of her daughter in her 30s, smiling brightly with a bright face.
I was speechless when I saw a picture of a young portrait, no different from any other peers.
She felt that no consolation could be reached.
When she found it difficult to keep her mouth open, the victim's mother's hand as she placed coffee in her hand trembled like an aspen tree, and the father's eyes, staring at the floor beside it, were swollen as if he had cried for several days.
Her mother, Lee Jung-ok, couldn't hold back her grievance as she grabbed the reporter's forearm and said, "Think of your brother as dead. No, the reporter could have died."
The tragedy of that day could have been my business, and I came to realize more that it was no one else's business.
Mr. Lee, who said, "On the day of the disaster, I was dumbfounded and only thought about why my son had gone there," and said, "After a day, I wondered what my son had done wrong. Are the children not going anywhere?"
I even felt resentment in the tone mixed with anger.
The disaster that happened to young lives who could go anywhere is now passing by a month.
The conversation I had with the bereaved families of the five victims at the time of the disaster and a month later remains deep in my heart.
I couldn't fathom the feelings of the bereaved, so I heard all the stories they poured out.
The bereaved families had difficulties from the process of finding the body at the time of the disaster, and had to suffer from the unwanted disclosure of the list.
The police investigation that started after the disaster left only frustration, and he said that he was angry at the situation where no one was taking responsibility.
He also requested that the bereaved family be used as a means of political strife or misunderstood.
My son died... no one tells me right
The bereaved families all said that they found out about the death of the deceased only after lunch the day after the disaster.
On the night of the disaster, while watching the news, Jeong-ok Lee remembered her son who had said he was going to Itaewon that day.
When the phone didn't connect, he ran to Itaewon, but he couldn't find his son.
There was also no confirmation of whether or not he was alive at a nearby hospital.
I stayed up all day awake at the Hannam-dong community center where missing people were registered, and it was not until lunch the next day that I received a call that my son was in the morgue of a hospital in Ilsan.
It took him over half a day to confirm that his son was alive and face the body.
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Mrs. A, a wife who lost her husband, said, "I will meet a friend," and left home and found out about her husband's life and death at lunch the next day.
Her husband couldn't reach her until the next morning, so she was anxious, but a policeman came to the house and told her husband's death.
As the identification process on the day of the disaster was delayed, the bereaved families had to spend a long time struggling.
On the morning after the disaster, some families came to the reporters in front of the indoor gymnasium in Wonhyo-ro, Yongsan-gu and asked if they were alive or dead.
The faces of the families who asked, "Do you have a list of the deceased?" "How can I find out where my brother is when he says he is going to Itaewon and I can't contact him?" were both worried and fearful.
That's why there was not enough guidance after the accident.
Publication of unwanted list... Deletion request directly
The bereaved families were again outraged when the list of unwanted deaths was released after the disaster.
On the 14th of last month, an Internet media became controversial by revealing the real names of 155 of the victims.
There was no prior consent from the bereaved family, and it was deleted only when the bereaved family requested it directly.
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Survivor A said that he found out that the real name of the deceased had been disclosed only after reading the article.
He tried to find the homepage to complain and called first, but he said that the call was not connected.
So he sent a protest mail to the reporter's email address, and it wasn't until the next morning that the name was removed.
It was a real name disclosure without consent, but deletion was only possible if the bereaved family came forward.
During this process, Mr. A said, "I felt a deep sense of helplessness and loss that we (the bereaved family) could not do anything."
A sluggish investigation... Why is no one taking responsibility?
On the 1st, the police set up a special investigation headquarters for the Itaewon disaster, but they have not been able to avoid criticism that the investigation is slow.
The bereaved family also expressed their frustration.
Mr. A expressed his disbelief, saying, "If the police had worked quickly and clearly, I don't think there would even have been a talk of a government investigation."
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Moon Seong-cheol, who sent his 30-year-old son away, took issue with the fact that no high-ranking official has yet resigned himself from responsibility for the disaster.
In particular, he criticized Minister of Public Administration and Security Lee Sang-min for not letting go of his position and saying, "I just enjoy the current power."
He added, "In a situation where the minister directly reveals his intention not to take responsibility, it will be difficult for the public officials under him to have the idea of taking responsibility."
All 158 bereaved families think differently... please don't sing
The stories of the bereaved families I have heard are only about 5 of the 158 victims.
It's a pity that we couldn't hear and convey the voices of more bereaved families.
A bereaved family council is being formed, but there are many bereaved families who are not part of the council.
The bereaved families all said, "I know that there is a gaze to disparage the bereaved family," and asked "don't misinterpret it."
He asked, "Everyone's thoughts may be different, so please listen to each individual's voice."
I believe it will be the government's responsibility to listen to and reflect the voices of each bereaved family member.