AMMAN — There are many aspects of competition among children, including areas such as seeking leadership or winning the title of champion or outstanding student at school, and some believe that competition is harmful, but others see it as beneficial. So what are the advantages and disadvantages of competition between children? How can its positive presence be enhanced among young people?

The consultant in psychiatry, Dr. Ashraf Al-Salhi, defines competition as a behavior that an individual takes either for success, defense or control, and may be positive or negative; competition is a psychological phenomenon that works to develop the mental and emotional powers of the child, and to gain a set of skills that help him in social compatibility and face new situations that occur around him from life experiences and experiences.

Al-Salhi explains that some children have a tendency to compete more than others, as this is part of their personal formation, pointing out that the matter has positive and negative aspects, and it is the duty of parents to pay attention to the issues that children compete on with their peers, and work to develop the spirit of positive competition and the spirit of teamwork with children without hating others.

Dr. Ashraf Al-Salhi: Parents must develop healthy competition (Al Jazeera)

Developing healthy competition

Al-Salhi advises parents to teach their children to compete with their peers for beneficial activities because they deserve competition and to be role models for their children, so parents talk in front of their children about their achievements, so that they learn from a young age to focus on achievements more than on the superiority of others.

He explains that the development of healthy competition and motivation is verbal and behavioral, so that encouragement always focuses on the performance performed by the child in the completion of a game or a specific activity at a specific time, with a focus on words such as "excellent", "brave" and "strong".

He stresses the need for parents to be aware of the areas in which their child innovates and brings out his abilities, such as mental, motor and mental games, and music, in addition to securing home activities for children that suit their ages, which enhances the competitive aspect between them, and directing the child towards performance and excellence and his sense of achievement and achieving the goal develops self-confidence.

"We have to encourage and motivate the child within his mental or physical abilities, and not just encourage him to win, because we know that he may succeed or lose. We should avoid blaming him for losing a certain activity, because repeated criticism and blame affect his personality and reflect negatively on his relationships with his surroundings, generating hatred, jealousy and hatred between him and others."

Bushra Arabiyat: Competition between children should be treated with great caution so that this does not reflect on students frustration and despair (Al Jazeera)

Bullying

Educational consultant Bushra Arabiyat believes that it is normal for there to be competition between children, whether within the family or at school, and the matter must be dealt with very carefully so that this does not reflect on students frustration and despair due to the inability of some of them to compete with others, and this requires educators to adopt methods and arts to deal with students, regardless of their abilities and potentials.

Arabiyat pointed out that there are serious consequences of unhealthy competition, including bullying and lack of interaction between teacher and student, as well as a decline in students' academic achievement as their psychological status declines.

Managing Competitive Behavior

The educational and family specialist, Dr. Ayesh Nawaisa, says that a positive environment is an important requirement to achieve a comprehensive and balanced development of the child, and this requires educators or parents to have a social behavior and a sound psychological and emotional dealing with the child in all fields, while relying on motivation and making the growth process logical and within its natural context.

This would contribute to the child's development and help him progress educationally, which will reflect positively on his behavior, personality, relationships with his peers and the environment in which he lives, and this requires families and educators to take special care of the child away from thinking about the ego, and make him understand competition within his social framework.

Dr. Ayesh Nawaisa: Competition must depend on motivation and make the growth process logical and within its natural context (Al Jazeera)

Benefits and consequences of competition

The site "parentsnkids" published some of the advantages and disadvantages of competition between children, pointing out that the most important advantages are:

  • Prepare children for the real life conditions of the future.
  • Helping children learn basic life skills, such as perseverance and resilience, are all beneficial to them in adulthood.
  • Encourage children to learn from their mistakes and always try, as the failure or mistake that a child makes can help him become a more solid person, so that he does not collapse when faced or difficult in his way.

As for the consequences of competition, the main ones are the following:

  • Excessive stress in competition can lead to negative emotions that affect the child.
  • Competition can negatively affect a child's self-esteem if they believe they are not up to par or are not rewarded for their efforts.
  • If parents fail to compete, parents resentful of a child can cause them to feel anxious and insecure because they think they're not good enough.