Thank you, Ochan, August 27, 20:06
Summer vacation home trips and family trips.
It's time to go out with children, but when a child crys or screams loudly, what is worrisome is “social gaze”.
On the net, there is an endless cry of criticism for going out with children. Meanwhile, a mother who experienced an event tweeted.
"Thank you, uncle"
(Network reporter reporter Naoko Okubo Naoya Saito Asako Wada)
Screaming on the Shinkansen ...
A post written by the musician Kenki-san about the “early period” of a two-and-a-half-year-old daughter has received a great response on the Internet.
According to a post that wrote about what happened when the swords went back to Tokyo from Nagano Prefecture, where their parents live, this time when they were on the Shinkansen with their daughter, the daughter's mood became worse from the middle. is.
The little thing that Mr. Sword wiped off the sweat on his forehead finally cried out loudly, saying, “Forehead is different!” And began to cry.
Then the passenger in the back seat was said to be “noisy!”, And Mr. Sword moved to the deck and scrambled, but the unpleasant daughter stopped crying “Daddy is different” or “Daddy Ya” Hmm.
This time, other passengers who saw the situation reported to the police that there was a risk of kidnapping, and the police officers asked about the circumstances at the station where they stopped.
After showing my ID card or calling my wife on the spot, the doubt was finally cleared, so when I posted such a tengu on the net, `` Our child is too bad and serious '' , “It was a prejudice against the father raising children,” and so on.
Even medical institutions ...
It's not just transportation.
On the net, there are stories of experiencing difficulties in various places.
Some mothers say that unpleasant children cried and cried out when they had surgery at the hospital, and the doctors spoke to them.
"I'm sorry for the surroundings, but I can understand my son's fear. There, a doctor says. 'I can't stand it?"
While screaming, accusing voices
There are many voices on the SNS, lamenting that it is hard to go out when there are unpleasant children.
“I'm afraid to take the train with children as much as possible, but when I still have to get on the train ... I was pulled by the image of 'people who usually ride without being able to care for the minimum. It ’s very hard. ”
“If a pregnant woman gets on the train, she is deliberately bumped and complains about strollers and crying. The point is that she is going out with her children.
On the other hand, some say that children cannot cry in transportation and restaurants.
"I can still forgive my baby. No more than kindergarten. If there are children in the train, I will change the vehicle."
Some have accused the voice of “society is cold for people with children” as “a problem for parents who are not disciplined”.
"Everyone has to deal with parents. Strollers are a weapon on a crowded train."
"Welcome with children! I do not want you to misunderstand
In fact, some voices point out the bad manners of their parents.
On SNS, such writing is now a hot topic.
Special article on “Wire Mama”, a free paper that sends information useful to mothers in Kumamoto Prefecture.
While introducing a restaurant called “Kids with Children”, we added this “provided note” as a “request from the editing room”.
“We are introducing a shop called“ Kids with Children ”, but it does n’t mean that children can do anything. When a child makes a noise or gets into trouble, let ’s teach them properly. In addition, it is important to protect yourself as a parent, such as not bringing in food or taking out a new diaper.By properly eating the rules and manners, you will be able to enjoy more lunch with your children. ''
When this article is posted on Twitter, “Childcare magazine, it ’s hard to pay attention to parents until this ... The shop is going to have a hard time” There was a voice that there was actually a bad parent.
“You can't drink at the drink bar, throw away the juice and mix it up.
When I asked Daisuke Matsuda, Editor-in-Chief of “Wire Mama Kumamoto,” why he wrote “provided”, it was n’t possible for a child to make a noise or a rough run from a restaurant. I want to remember to speak properly. ”Many people said that they added a message.
Matsuda, the editor-in-chief, who is also raising children, says, “It ’s a shame that we ca n’t deliver that information because we ’re very much encouraged by moms and children to watch out for the bad behavior of some manners. If our manners improve, it will be easier for the store to speak loudly and say “Welcome to children!” If both the store and customers with children can feel comfortable, more and more I think it would be possible to create a city where it is easy to go out with children and to raise children. "
How to survive the pinch
So how do you survive when your child starts crying and you can't do anything if you talk or talk?
On the SNS, various ingenuities created after hard work are introduced.
"I'm pretty good for kids who carry stickers and are bad."
In addition to showing off the sticker and overcoming the pinch when the child begins to crumble, some people use their favorite sweets such as frozen grape candy and character confectionery as trump cards.
"When the upper 9-year-old child was eating ice cream, I was worried because I wanted to eat a 1-year-old child (acclaimed unpleasant period), but I found everything in the convenience store. did"
Some of them are craftsmen who have created amazing techniques.
“I'm a 9-year-old daughter. I don't know if it's helpful, but when my daughter was unpleasant, I stopped rolling when I rolled around the floor and said,“ Don't hate! ” I had a lot of courage to do it ... "
Private rooms and children ’s vehicles
What should I do in a closed space like the Shinkansen?
When talking to a person in charge of JR Tokai who operates the Tokaido Shinkansen, the Shinkansen has a private room called a “multi-purpose room” that can be used by people with disabilities preferentially. You may be able to use it when you feel unwell or need breastfeeding.
In addition, JR Tokai has been providing services for people going out with their children since nine years ago.
We have set up “Family Vehicles” for children with children during the Bon Festival and New Year holidays when the number of returnees increases.
In the summer, there are several cars a day, one on each vehicle, such as on weekends from July to September.
Advance reservations are required, but assuming that children move around or have large luggage, the reserved people will have one more seat than the number of people.
So far, a total of 80,000 people have used it, and the number of repeaters has also increased.
The JR Tokai Public Relations Office says, “Since the crew members are traveling around in order to have a comfortable stay in the car, please talk to us if there is anything, even if it is not a family vehicle.”
Expert “no clear norm”
In the first place, why is there a “friction” between parents with their children and society?
I asked Associate Professor Yosuke Hirota of Fukuyama City University who specializes in pedagogy and has a book on the relationship between transportation and childcare.
According to Associate Professor Hirota, until about 20 years ago, the gaze around the parents with children was more severe, and parents tended to give up going out to avoid troubles. The parent's feeling of “I want to go out” has gradually been accepted by the surroundings.
However, the social norms are clear for parents who are raising children, compared to the fact that ill patients, the elderly, and pregnant women should be considered in public places such as transportation. Because it is not, it seems that friction is occurring due to different ways of taking it.
“People who have been raising children may ask for patience and perseverance, but that does n’t fit the current era. It ’s hard to give an answer right away, but a child is n’t what you want. No, society must develop a gentler look ”(Associate Professor Hirota)
Thank you
This episode is also introduced on the net.
It happened to be a mother who was saved by the kindness of "Occhan" who passed by.
“When my daughter was one year old, this was a bad day! I sat down on the roadside and cried. Thank you, uncle, that day I remembered that I didn't shout out to my daughter because she laughed, but she didn't do anything, just laugh I was just relieved, but that was just a relief. "
Little by little, towards the answer
To what extent are young children crying and noisy behavior allowed in public spaces where many people come and go?
I think there are various ways of thinking depending on the situation and people.
However, if you leave it, “friction” will continue to irritate and hurt many people.
Would you like to think about this theme and look for answers little by little?
NHK is looking for opinions on various issues related to child-rearing on the special site “Do not worry alone”.
Please send us your feedback through the posting form on the site.
What do you think about this?