Cristina Galafate

Updated Friday, February 2, 2024-02:15

  • Interview Ferran Cases, from suffering paralysis due to anxiety to helping people make it disappear: "Nothing in life is so urgent"

  • Koro Cantabrana This is how hidden stress threatens your life: "You don't stop until you burst"

In the same way that in his monologues he laughs at the anxiety that led to his hospitalization, he does it at himself. "I always say that

I'm a fool who explains his shit

about him," says Ferran Cases (Barcelona, ​​April 6, 1984). He has turned a hospital crisis in his twenties caused by stress and self-demand into a way of life. And he's not doing bad at all. This year he turns 40 and runs Bye Bye Ansiedad, a center with a team of professional psychologists and therapists. He has thousands of followers spreading information about personal development and

has already written six books

. In the last one, edited by Diana, he says

Yes to (almost everything)

. And he adds: "What if you already had what you need to be happy?"

All my life trying to learn how to say no and set limits and his book arrives and proposes a "siatodism". What does this brave yes that he proposes consist of and which has nothing to do with naive positivism? And why the almost in parentheses? (Laughs). Now this crazy guy is coming to break our schemes, right? What I want to say is that within every no there is a yes. I explain. What is the best way to see life, from a no or a yes? Let's go to an example from my day today. I slept for three hours nervous about promoting my book, I took an AVE from Barcelona to Madrid and what I would like right now is to go to sleep. Since no, I can feel terrible about the missed opportunity. Since yes, I am going forward with this interview with my best attitude. But be careful, this does not mean that we are obliged to be better. We all have shit days. We have all been dumped by a partner or fired from work. But, instead of sinking, we have to realize how long we are in this life and try to enjoy it. I am one of those who prefer to ask for forgiveness rather than permission. The almost thing is because it's not about accepting every credit card they sell you over the phone or adopting every cat in the neighborhood. It's about

accepting life's experiences as they are

, instead of how we would like them to be. He provides many keys that have helped him improve his habits, from book and author recommendations to tips like writing down everything he does. But what has helped you the most in ending anxiety? Without a doubt, what helps me the most is not being so strict with myself. It's okay if I don't do everything I set out to do in one day, even if I have written it down in my diary. We are in a social moment of

brutal self-demand

. I try to do what I can with what I have without feeling guilty. One of the tools that it provides on its pages is having moments of digital disconnection, where I leave my cell phone in another room. Do you think everyone should have them? Above all, I see it as necessary for young people, because

the Internet is a window to an infinite universe

that can free you, but also trap you. If we notice the time we spend on social networks, we will realize that it is a black hole. You enter Instagram for a notification for a second and, before you realize it, you have started an infinite

scroll

that makes you waste two hours. Now board games or vinyl records are making a comeback that we make an effort to press

play

because people, unconsciously, are looking for that inner peace. Of all the anecdotes he tells where the toxic mentality comes into play or everything is disastrous, the funniest is the day he didn't flirt with Scarlett Johansson on the set of

Vicky Cristina Barcelona

. Why didn't she dare to tell him something? Every time doubt or shyness takes over I remember Scarlett. I couldn't play my cards because she paralyzed me with fear. We lose many opportunities due to "tremenditis." Our problem is that

we believe we are the center of the universe, and nothing is that important

. Courage gives you freedom to explore, to live your own story instead of someone else's. She says that many poorly updated psychologists have plenty of time and lack readings. And she calls influencers

charlatans

who sell Dragon Ball-style changes overnight. Where do we place you, if it is neither one nor the other? In the sense of humor. I consider myself an empathetic and fresh guy and my way of approaching personal growth is by stripping it naked. It is true that I run a psychiatry center to overcome anxiety with very good and trained professionals and that I tell many things on social networks, but my position is earthly: I am not trying to sell any motorcycle, I am the person who has suffered from anxiety until the end. about to end up hospitalized and, from then on, he has tried to overcome it by trying everything, studying... And I have realized that

science is not categorical or closed

, because studies can say one thing today and, later, , something new is investigated or discovered and from that egg that raised cholesterol so much, we have two for breakfast. I explain my shit in theater monologues, people identify with it and laugh. Making people laugh is not that easy and anxiety is sometimes not funny at all... It's difficult but

therapeutic

. I am very proud of my team of psychologists who end anxiety by personalizing each case, but when you yourself add humor to everything and take the edge off, you learn from every bad situation and end up winning. How did you go from living in no to yes? ?When I lived with anxiety I was in that disastrous attitude. But hitting rock bottom is the best thing that ever happened to me. I realized this is four days and we complain too much. He writes: "If I have learned anything in this life, it is that true power is not in having what you want, but in wanting what you have." Why then don't we know how to value it? Because we are overstimulated.

Success is not having a big house and a great car

, you already have what you need: enough. A roof, a meal, a hot shower... Does it really take that much to be happy? But social networks offer a window into the world of comparison and envy... How can we modify junk thoughts, banish bad habits and put an end to the attitude that boycotts us? Getting to know each other. I can go on Instagram and compare myself to a muscular 20-year-old who does a lot of sports and eats great. But I'm 40, I have children and obligations and I can't train that much, I have to settle for my 20 minutes of calisthenics and try to walk everywhere. Listening to me, I know what it is for me. Everyone is happy on social networks. But it is impossible to compare yourself with those people from your situation and your priorities. You have to accept reality and, from there, put a good attitude towards what you want to achieve. I base it on three pillars of attitude:

sweat

, see everything with perspective and realize that nothing is vital;

to love

, starting with oneself and unconditionally to be able to love others, and

to bet

on yes, for a brave life. It seems easy to say and difficult to apply. It is a matter of repetition. We are very sensitive to failure, and it is the only opportunity to grow. I myself, in my multiple failures, have learned and today I am not the same. What must be clear in the society of immediacy is that whoever wants something costs something. But we are in a moment of wanting everything easy and immediately. The brain is not programmed to be happy, but to survive, as Sara Teller told me when we wrote the book about overcoming anxiety with the help of neuroscience. You have to make an effort, things don't come alone. It goes from anxiety to positivism just when more experts warn that it can become toxic if we become even more overwhelmed by trying to be happy. Is that approach frustrating us? Absolutely. In fact, anxiety, when it comes to us from something external, we manage to trick it better than when it is caused by ourselves and our demands.

We must not fall into the cheap positivism that social networks sell us

. We can all want to be alone at any given moment, sad or very tired. But life is a long-distance race. We must enhance what we already have and stop looking for the latest morning ritual or fad diet. End the noise and focus on action. And why is someone who manages to have a good habit criticized and monitored so much? We have to stop judging and criticizing to respect what makes everyone happy, whether vegan or keto. For my

show

I usually consult the reviews of my books and I see that those same users are dedicated to posting hundreds of negative reviews. I take it with a smile. And I think in what state that person will be in and

what will be behind

of what it says.

Yes to (almost) everything

, by Ferran Cases, is edited by Diana and you can buy it here