[Soup] How to properly deal with old people - Professor Kim Kyung-il

“I haven’t counted precisely, but I think I give more than 100 lectures a year, and in fact, I have more meetings. There are also meetings at universities, but how to make advertisements in companies, how to reduce the number of people leaving the company, when new products come out What color should I choose, there are many meetings big and small.”

"There was a time when managers who fired five employees with their own hands gave a lecture at a company where they sat for about 100 minutes. There are companies that allocate that way. It's a very bad method. It's hard to agree. I went in without knowing that fact. But I feel it in an instant. People whose minds are just tattered, like platoon commanders who lost a lot of men after having a hand-to-hand fight in a war movie, become dazed, and those bosses are also extremely injured. That was the first time since then, studies that show that people who have been separated and people who have notified others of their breakup are actually the same as people who have been injured in brain science, people who have been in a car accident, people who have been stabbed, and people who have broken bones have been eye-opening since then. came in."

"Even when I give lectures to second-year middle school students, my body comes out all wet. But I still do it five or six times a year. I must. I have to force it. I become stronger after going to that lecture. It's like I've finished hell training."

"It's because we're so very different. Why do human beings have the most different personalities between siblings who come from one parent? They're really different. I can't get a complete answer yet, but I'm thinking about it. Aren't humans fertile? .And the mother has to carry it for ten months as a fetus, and it takes 10 or 20 years to function as a human being. You can't lose each individual. We are imagining how it evolved at this point. Perhaps something will happen. I made it so that they don't take the same action when it happens. If something flies from the other side, the older brother runs to the front, but the younger brother runs to the back, then at least half of them live. So one of the most important characteristics of human beings is individual differences, diversity. The same Even if you look at it, everyone thinks differently.

But here, the ability to think about how others will act and what others will think.

The ability to guess the minds of others.

Without it, the world would not be peaceful.

I don't stop thinking that that person is just like that, they're wrong, they can't coexist.

So, if you look at human history, different religions and other beliefs fought so desperately.

The ability to understand others and recognize various values, the individual's ability, but the ability of society or the nation is the most important time than anything else.

Our society is interested in psychology because it is receiving such demands of the times."

At least, when you buy a new smartphone, a manual comes out, but the fact that we never study the human manual is a bit..."

"Because I cook first and then eat it all, hahaha. I don't know if you're an old man or not, but one thing's for sure, I think you'd better not go grilling meat."

“I saw a student wearing earphones while listening to my class. Are you showing off that you don’t like the class? I'm plugging this in, and when I plug it in, I can only hear the professor. What are you talking about?"

"If I were the department head of that department, I would only set the situation or time period where I shouldn't be wearing it, and do the rest as you please. If you're listening to music or doing other things with it, you won't be able to do important tasks. It's a lie like humans study while listening to music. I don't have this. I can't do multitasking at all. You have to concentrate, you can't make mistakes, you have to do things meticulously, and I think I'll tell you, don't do anything else when you're doing this. Actually these days, when I'm driving, talking on the phone, or listening to the radio. If you put it in reverse gear to park, the volume drops drastically? Focus on that. It tells your brain not to multitask. So when I go to corporate advisors, they even tell me not to open any other windows. There are days when I open about 15 windows on my computer as soon as I go to work. ? That day is usually the day I get off work without doing anything. It ends after I scramble between the windows. Usually, telling people not to do something is a very uncomfortable request, but it's a pretty good, acceptable request to not do something when they're doing something. . It's just, 'You don't do that at work.' This is a very ambiguous statement."

"Studying cognitive psychology or other psychology doesn't mean that my feelings won't come out. It's not like I'm unhappy when I see someone, or when I see someone? It's the same when I'm surprised. There's a very famous saying in psychology. and decision making.

"If you don't feel fear, it's weird. It's normal to be scared when you see something. You feel it. Then run away? Should you confront it? I have friends, a generosity disease. To see and understand someone, I have to start from not feeling unpleasant. There are sometimes psychologists who make this mistake. I think it is an obvious mistake. It only makes you suffer more. Feeling emotions It's natural, but by blocking that emotion itself, you're generous and understanding?

"Who annoys me? Be annoyed. And cheer me up with actions. If you don't understand that the emotions you feel may be different from your actions, you won't be able to do either. It means you don't have to choose either option. I got on the elevator, and I was in a hurry to press the close button. But I press the open button from the outside and someone gets on. I'm in a hurry to die. Then, everyone thinks like this inside. Annoyed. Talk about it honestly, but I support you, or I'm very disappointed, but I still love you. If you do it, you'll feel better. You need to try."

“You have to have your own definition that I absolutely can’t stand. It’s okay to say ‘I mean latte’ 100 times, but I really can’t stand having dinner on the same day. Then the other person can say, "I treated that person with the same intensity anyway, but he explodes with a bang, so what is he doing?" As a result, I have no choice but to tell the generation that I am impulsive. That's why I have to have it. Even if I endure everything, I can't stand this."

"If that person isn't a really bad person, it's really okay to say such things in a good mood on a daily basis. It's very important to keep putting 'my user manual' in that person. It's good to give. It's really good when you joke like 'I will be loyal to the director for a hundred years.' The key point of this phrase is that I will see you for a long time, because there is no better word for a senior than that. I joked that the president's term of office is four years. "I've already done it for 2 years, but there are only 2 years left. If I become the president, I will do my best for 30 years, yes. It seems that this kind of joke has no meaning, but to seniors, you are reassured that I will see you for a long time." It's good. Even if you're going to stay with me for a long time, you have to avoid it, and while avoiding overly objective statements such as "I won't see you for a long time," think about it. Even when we're in a relationship, we talk nonsense. You don't just use negative language, you do a little bit of emotional language. It's good to say a little bit of language for the other person."

"Actually, I'm never mentally strong. Psychologists do psychology because they have weak mentality. Other psychologists also talk a lot about how timid you are to do psychology. Sensitive people do psychology. Sensitive and weak mental don't necessarily match. I'm breaking down a lot and having a lot of trouble, but I cut it into small pieces and put up several stepping stones to cross it. In a collapsed state. Leaving the stepping stones quickly and walking slowly. That way is better, but you know how to do it.”

“Cognitive psychology research, as well as other psychological studies, need to have many stepping stones. If you take a depressed person to a buffet, it will be a big problem. There is so much food. . To someone who is depressed, what do you like? I like tteokbokki. Then, a plate of tteokbokki is in trouble. Put three tteokbokki in a paper cup and push it in. Then, what is this person doing and slurping it? Then we talk about this. Is there any more? A stepping stone came out.”

"For those who are struggling with depression, ask your mother if you have tableware from when you were a child. Bring it with you. Serve it in the tableware you used when you were a child and eat it. They say you will eat it right away. It is a stepping stone to get out of a helpless state. The same goes for anger, depression. Likewise, I don't like the word "overcoming", basically jumping over the hook."