[Gollum] Busy and crowded 293: Will I ever be able to shine? - Jinjoo Cho
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My karma is invisible and difficult to explain, but it has a precious and beautiful value.
I am now convinced that I can burn my life for these values.
- From 『Can Someday Be Shining』
What is this karma that appears in this sentence, 'It is invisible and difficult to explain, but has a precious and beautiful value' and 'I will burn my life for this'. Yes, it's music. 『Will It Be Shine One Day?』 (published outside) is the first essay by violinist Jinju Cho. This is a new book that came out on the 7th of May.
Some of you may be familiar with the name Jo Jin-joo, and remember your history, performances, or articles that have been serialized in the audience before, who is it? Some of you may be doing it the first time you hear it. The author's introduction in this book is very brief. 'fiddler. A 9-year-old puppy's butler with a smile. 'Romantic rationalist', 'Chocolate, coffee, and work addict' ... In addition to this lovely introduction, if you are looking for a more simplistic history, you can find the first prize at the Montreal International Music Competition in 1988 and at the age of 17 in 2006, the first prize at the Buenos Aires International Violin Competition in 2010, and the second prize in the violin division of the 2011 Lee Sang International Music Competition. Above, 1st prize at the 2012 Alice Schonfeld International Competition, 1st prize at the 2014 Indianapolis International Violin Competition. won the contest. And currently, he is working as a professor at McGill University in Canada along with performing activities. We also established the 'Encore Chamber Music Institute' and hold a music festival every summer.
Obviously, the title of the book is 'Will it be shiny someday', but just looking at the history, I sometimes think, 'It seems like it has been shiny for a long time.'
On the surface, they seem to be infinitely shiny, elegant, and full of confidence in their own path, but not all of them are like that, and they are not the only ones who are like that.
Most of all, the moment you think you lost your light is different from what you see from the outside.
The title of the book, 'Will It Be Shining Someday', was taken from the title of an article in the book.
Imagining a perfect performance on a global stage felt like a future reward for enduring a long training period, but on the other hand, as an adult, it became a double-edged sword that gave me an unbearable sense of defeat and humiliation.
It was really painful to adjust my expectations, which I thought would be like this if I just worked hard.
When I feel jealousy that I can't handle, I really feel a fire inside me.
My blood boils and my intestines seem to burn.
My heart is pounding and I feel like I'm going to get nauseous.
You may be out of breath and suddenly burst into anger or cry.
Powerful jealousy hurts as much as you can feel it in your body.
But this fire burns only what is inside of me.
My abilities, my possibilities, my future.
My country has to be kind to me, but it is not easy to trust and love me when the wind of anxiety blows.
- From 『Can Someday Be Shining』
This book contains, surprisingly, unadorned moments of the musician's hardship, shaking, atrophy, jealousy, disappointment with themselves, and rising again, which we did not know when we sat in the audience listening to the performance or listening to the record.
So, even if the reader is not familiar with classical music, as soon as he grabs the book, he can't put it down and read it at once.
The author said, 'Why did you choose the violin?'
I ask if the violin I started as a child was really my 'choice'.
By the time he realized that he was on the path of becoming a violinist 'by accident', he had already spent too much time and energy.
So after that, he said he spent his 20s trying to find answers to the meaning of this 'choice not a choice', is this what I really want to do, and what role music can play in this world.
It wasn't until he was in his mid-20s that he thought, 'It's okay to do music for the rest of my life'.
I had to learn to love music over a long period of time.
The process of learning what it feels like to love music and what it means, just like the process of falling in love with someone, was sometimes accompanied by a lot of pain.
So, all the writings in this book are confessions dedicated to music.
It is also a record of the inner changes I have gone through before I can go back and forth and say that I love music deeply.
- From 『Can Someday Be Shining』
This book contains a wide range of joy, reward, and sadness of violinist Jinju Cho, from the relationship between the player and the instrument, practice, the body of the performer, the story of what he teaches, and the loss of his father's death.
In addition, readers who are not musicians will greatly sympathize with the contents of how to protect themselves and fill their artistic energy as a performer whose love for one's karma, evaluation and comparison follow like fate.
In the epilogue of this book, Mr. Jo Jin-ju said,
'I was writing this book to convey my love for music.
As much as possible, including my most embarrassing and shameful desires.
I thought that only when I had overcome my fear of revealing my weaknesses would I be able to share the most authentic experiences.'
and wrote.
Not all of us have professional musicians as friends.
It's a world you can only see from afar.
Still, reading this book will make you feel like you have a musician from afar.
Passionate, sensitive, overly humble.
I love classical music with all my body, mind and soul.
If time is what you cannot grasp and life is what flows, then you feel that the finiteness of sound and music is similar to life.
- From 『Can Someday Be Shining』
It's a job that allows you to bring the past time, the people that have passed, and the emotions and thoughts they felt to the present and here.
This is really cool.
Because of this, it is impossible not to practice for that moment full of vitality.
- From 『Can Someday Be Shining』
* Permission to read has been obtained from the publisher.
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