My husband and brother died in Corona "I killed you" Days to blame myself May 27, 11:34
"I killed my dad"
April 1st.
A woman in her 60s in Osaka went to visit a grave with her husband and an older brother who lives in the neighborhood.
However, all were infected with the new corona and were hospitalized.
By the time he was discharged, his husband in his 80s and his brother in his 70s had already died.
I couldn't take care of him or witness the cremation.
Women continue to blame themselves.
(Osaka base broadcasting station reporter Toru Shimokoshi)
"I killed my dad"
A house in a quiet residential area of Higashi-Osaka, Osaka.
The room is lined with a brand new large refrigerator, TV and sofa.
Children are already independent.
I had just bought furniture and home appliances, saying, "Let's make the old age of two people fun."
However, now, only Kazuyo (a pseudonym) in his 60s lives in this house.
Her husband in his 80s was infected with the new corona and died on April 25.
The remaining Kazuyo is quietly holding his hand on the Buddhist altar where the remains of her husband are enshrined.
With regret.
Kazuyo:
"I killed my dad. If I went to the grave that day, everyone would be living happily now."
After visiting the grave with three people ...
The cause of the infection was visiting a grave.
On April 1, Kazuyo went to visit the grave with her husband and an older brother in his 70s who lived in the neighborhood.
My brother was on good terms with my husband, and the three of us went on a trip and had a meal.
I left in my brother's car early in the morning, finished eating at a coffee shop, and then headed to a graveyard in Hyogo prefecture.
I usually refrained from eating out as much as possible to avoid infection with the new corona.
However, that day is her husband's birthday.
Since it was a small group of relatives only, we had a meal at the steakhouse with three people on the way home as a celebration.
"I have a high fever"
The next day, April 2nd.
The situation changes completely when my brother contacts me.
"I have a high fever."
After that, my brother's positive was found, and the health center contacted me that he became a close contact.
Both Kazuyo and her husband had a fever of 38 degrees.
However, I couldn't find a hospital and couldn't get an examination.
I continued to take home medical treatment while taking over-the-counter antipyretics, but the effect of the drug disappeared within a few days.
It was April 6th that I was finally able to undergo the inspection.
On April 7, both couples will be found positive.
"I'm okay, so mom, get ahead."
Kazuyo's symptoms are getting worse and worse.
I couldn't stand on April 8th, so I contacted the health center.
He was transported by ambulance to a medical institution in Higashi-Osaka City and was hospitalized as it was.
Husband
"I'm okay, so mom, get ahead"
The husband chose to stay at home and continue his medical treatment.
A friend finds a husband who is lying down in the living room
However, two days later, April 10th.
A friend who comes to deliver a meal finds her husband lying down in the living room.
Upon receiving the call, Mr. Kazuyo asked Osaka Prefecture, which coordinates hospitalization, to be admitted to the same medical institution as himself.
However, he refused, "I can't because I have a turn."
My husband was admitted to a medical institution in the neighboring city of Yao.
The last words I exchanged with my husband
Worried, Kazuyo called her husband that night.
It is said that her husband was concerned about Mr. Kazuyo even when he was hospitalized.
Husband
"Mom, what
's up
?"
Kazuyo
"It
's
okay, Dad. I can go home together."
There were other patients in the room where Mr. Kazuyo was hospitalized.
I suppressed the desire to talk longer and hung up immediately.
After that, Kazuyo called her husband many times, but never connected again.
It was the last word I had with my husband.
Husband's condition deteriorates As the medical system in Osaka becomes stricter ...
Why didn't my husband get a call?
I learned the reason from the line from my daughter who was contacted by the hospital.
April 12 Line from my daughter
"I got a call from the hospital. I intubated in the morning. I feel uncomfortable when the sedative runs out, so I've been asleep all the time."
Two days after admission, her husband became ill on April 12, and was in need of a ventilator.
At that time, the number of patients in Osaka increased rapidly, and securing beds was an issue.
Osaka Prefecture has asked 24 relatively large hospitals to continue treatment without transferring them even if mild or moderately ill patients become severely ill.
The hospitalization destination of my husband was also subject to the request.
April 12 Line from my daughter
"I have requested a transfer, but I have little hope."
The husband continued treatment at the same hospital without being transferred.
Kazuyo is infected with Corona and is hospitalized, so she cannot go to see her husband.
Only my daughter's line interacting with the hospital was relied on.
April 18
Kazuyo
Rhein
"I'm
worried about my dad"
Daughter
"I think my
dad
is doing his best"
April 19th,
Kazuyo
Rhein
"I want to know about my dad, I wonder if I can eat something"
Daughter
"I can't eat anything. My dad is sleeping all the time. I'm conscious because I have a respiratory system in my mouth. It seems that he is sleeping because it is painful. "
Rhein's
daughter
on April 20
"My father is in the same state, but his lungs are almost non-functional. I will continue to wait until the weekend. I think he may not recover anymore because he is old."
My older brother who was hospitalized died
The condition of my husband, which is transmitted from the text, got worse day by day.
I went to visit the grave together and was informed that my brother, who had been hospitalized earlier, died on April 16th.
"I don't know if my older brother died ..."
"Is my husband okay ..."
Kazuyo was so shocked that he couldn't sleep and lost a lot of weight.
Husband died 9 days later
It's past 2:00 pm on April 25th.
My husband died at the hospital where he was hospitalized.
I didn't regain consciousness until the end.
Kazuyo heard the news on the bed and burst into tears.
The next day, a cremation was held, but I couldn't even attend.
Kazuyo was able to leave the hospital on April 27, two days after her husband's death.
My beloved husband, who was talking on the phone saying "I can go home with you," returned as a skeleton.
Kazuyo:
"I still can't believe it. That's why I didn't call him" Dad "even when I slept. Then I woke up and thought," Speaking of which, I'm sorry. "I wish I could pick up even one bone. I haven't seen anything myself. I'm only coming home with bones, but I really think "this person might be". I wonder if my dad will come back "I'm home". "
Days to continue to blame myself without organizing my feelings
It's been a month since Kazuyo was discharged from the hospital.
My physical strength, which I lost during my hospital stay, gradually recovered, and although I was taking a break, I was able to take a walk, which was my daily routine.
However, no more husband was welcoming me at home.
When he suddenly returns to himself, he blames himself for the actions he invited to visit the grave.
Kazuyo:
"I killed my dad because I said" go to the grave
.
"I took away the life of someone who enjoyed it so much, and I still wanted to live, and I enjoyed my life. If I didn't have a word, if I could go on that day ... I want to say "come back". My husband thinks he's dead and I'm sorry. I can only say "I'm sorry". "
Kazuyo couldn't even give her husband a funeral because she didn't want to be informed that she had been infected with corona.
I can't talk to the people around me, and I'm having trouble alone.
As of May 26, 2,217 people died of corona infection in Osaka prefecture, the highest number in Japan.
Each of them has an important family.
Because of Corona, he could not be seen directly or witnessed the cremation.
Kazuyo continues to blame himself without being able to organize his feelings.
Osaka-based broadcasting station reporter
Toru Shimokoshi
Joined the
station in
2008
After working in Asahikawa, Sapporo, and the political department, he is currently affiliated.
Covered the movements of administration and politics in the Osaka internal affairs group.