The first sexual intercourse is a delicate moment, which can raise many questions.

On Europe 1, the sexologist and psychoanalyst Catherine Blanc responds to the concerns of a young man who is about to make love for the first time with his girlfriend, and who is afraid of not satisfying her.

The prospect of having sex for the first time generates as many expectations as it does anxiety, for both boys and girls.

Would I go about it?

Will I be in pain?

What if I can't get an erection?

These questions generally place superfluous pressure on an intimate moment, often perceived as the first passage into adulthood.

In

Sans Rendez-vous

, the health program of Europe 1, the sexologist and psychoanalyst Catherine Blanc responds to a young listener, on the verge of taking action

with his girlfriend, and who is afraid "of not being at the height".

Toni's question

"With my girlfriend, we are ready. We want to do our first time together. But for my part, I have fears, especially that of not being up to it. How not to screw it up?"

>> Find all sex questions in replay and podcast here

Catherine Blanc's response

"Having anxieties is completely normal. During the first sexual intercourse we explore a universe and skills that we are totally ignorant of. If they say they are ready, it is because they have been around for a while. revolve around this subject and that they have chosen according to this competence to be able to share this intimacy, and in particular their worries. However, as Tony is reassured, his partner is undoubtedly as worried as he. on the quality of the relationship to trust her, but she must certainly also be in fear of not getting there, of being in pain or whatever?

What are the fears associated with having sex for the first time?

For a boy, to be afraid of not being up to the task is to be afraid of not being able to bend, of not staying erect long enough, or even of ejaculating too quickly.

These are concerns that revolve around performance a lot, which is legitimate.

Young boys tell themselves that sexuality is first of all penetration, and that you have to be able to penetrate and stay there to make a partner come.

Let's face it: the first time, it will mainly be a question for him to bend and penetrate.

And for her: to welcome.

The notions of pleasure, enjoyment and orgasm will be refined over time.

Does the first time always go wrong?

Often yes, and fortunately because we get rid of our first worries.

We try the adventure, we are a little awkward, a little clumsy, a little shaky, a little ambivalent.

So obviously, when we are in a situation, we find ourselves appallingly bad.

But we can reassure Tony by telling him that we've all been there.

It is these imperfections, these approximations and ultimately the little hiccups that push us to improve, to understand, to seek, to discover.

It is because we do not succeed that we continue our journey on the path of sexuality, in particular to improve ourselves.

What could we advise Tony and his girlfriend before taking action?

You have to go step by step, listen to others to know when to stop.

What applies to one must also apply to the other.

It takes trust and tenderness to go smoothly.

They must also remember that what is happening between them, in the privacy, no one else is supposed to know, which will also allow them to move forward serenely. "