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Lovesickness is one of the worst feelings in the world.
When a relationship breaks up, it also affects our behavior - and not just when the breakup actually takes place.
In the months before you break up or get dumped yourself, the failing partnership affects our actions and even our language on social networks.
This has been observed by a team of researchers from the US University of Texas in Austin.
To do this, the psychologists examined more than a million posts from 6,800 users on the social media platform Reddit, around a year before and after they reported their separation there.
On Reddit, users can exchange ideas online in various forums.
The results of the study were published in the journal Proceedings of the National Academy of Sciences.
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But how did the researchers know that the Reddit users will split up?
When analyzing the individual posts, the scientists noticed that the language of the users changed about three months before the love ended.
More precisely, they used more pronouns like “I” and “we” - even though most people didn't even realize at the time that they were going to be single soon.
This was the result of a subsequent survey of the researchers, as the head of the study Sarah Seraj explains in a press release from the University of Texas:
It seems that even before people know they are going to break up, their lives will be affected by it.
Sarah Seraj, lead study author, University of Texas
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It did not matter whether the people shared something about their love life on the social network or exchanged views with the community on a completely different topic.
Until the final point of separation, Reddit users were increasingly using personal pronouns.
About six months later, the effect slowly decreased again.
The Texas psychologists suspect that the cause lies in the fact that you think more about yourself and deal with your relationship just before the end of a relationship.
The language then becomes the expression of our inner life.
Psychologists have also observed a similar effect in people with depression.
When people are depressed, they are more likely to focus on themselves than to relate to others.
Sarah Seraj, psychologist, University of Texas
Therefore, increased use of the word “I” in everyday communication by psychologists is often seen as a sign of depression or a depressed mood.
The separation made itself felt on social media for a good year
Source: Getty Images / Cultura RF / Eugenio Marongiu
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Even if significantly fewer pronouns were to be found in the posts of the study participants after six months, the researchers found that the consequences could still be observed for a total of twelve months.
Only then did the language "normalize" again, and nothing more could be seen of the separation.
The team of scientists assumes that this could also be due to the fact that the newly separated on Reddit repeatedly deal with the love-off.
That makes it more difficult to process the emotional experience.
This observation coincides with the analysis of social media posts made by people who are going through a divorce or are in some other emotional upheaval.
A study by the University of Colorado that was published a year ago came to a similar conclusion.
Accordingly, you will repeatedly confront your ex on Instagram, Facebook, Twitter and other social networks.
It is therefore more difficult to complete.
The authors of this study had a very clear piece of advice for anyone who suffers from lovesickness: it is better to take a break from social media after a breakup.