This Tuesday in "Sans Rendez-vous", the sexologist and psychoanalyst Catherine Blanc answers Emilien, a listener complexed by his eczema patches.
For the specialist, this physical imperfection culminates in a real psychological suffering and a degradation of the relationship with the other.
We often talk about weight or height problems that restrict sexuality. On the other hand, we talk much less about these little peculiarities that are not really disabling but which are also a source of discomfort in sex life. Thus, a birthmark or an often benign ailment such as eczema can generate a serious complex in some individuals. Tuesday on Europe 1, the sexologist and psychoanalyst Catherine Blanc explains in "Sans Rendez-vous" that some people give an emotional charge to their physical defects.
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Emilien's question
"I regularly have eczema attacks on my body and it bothers me when I meet girls, I'm afraid I won't be attractive anymore. How do I fix it?"
Catherine Blanc's response
"Our small imperfections reflect emotional things: it is this 'emotional' that suddenly restricts our ease in offering ourselves physically and emotionally to the other.
How does eczema become a source of psychological suffering?
The mark eczema leaves on the body is not so much the problem as the 'fragility' it reveals.
It is less a physical problem than an emotional one.
Eczema is often the result of psychological events.
While the individual should take it as anecdotal, the problem becomes anxiety-provoking and painful.
The person no longer wants to be touched, there may be apprehension in being caressed: the caress does not lead to a soft but rough skin and also an unpleasant touch that puts distance and anxiety in the relationship.
Does the problem affect women and men equally?
Women are subjected to this injunction of physical perfection: they must be dolled up from head to toe so the slightest trace or unsightly element can be particularly unwelcome.
Yet the same traces on a man's body can be just as badly experienced especially if they are on the legs, thighs or genitals.
For both sexes, this harks back to the image of raw, irritated skin.
The face and neck are also very sensitive to this type of blemish.
What reaction does this elicit from the partner?
The other may experience an unpleasant touch, but it is especially the one who receives who has the impression of failing.
All these imperfections on the body reflect the way we look at our own history: if a person has a scar with no real emotional charge, he will have no problem being caressed.
On the other hand, if a morbid symbolism surrounds it, the problem appears. "