China News Service Client, Beijing, April 29 (Reporter Shangguan Yun Gaokai) When you are middle-aged, many people will feel that some real problems seem to strike: they are no longer young, their parents are old, "illness" And "death" was pushed directly in front of time.

　　In the new work published by the famous presenter Jing Yidan recently, he also wrote about the pain of his bereavement and his thinking about life. In 2017, her mother was diagnosed with cancer. Jing Yidan accompanied the old man through the last period of warmth, and later recorded the bits and pieces into a book.

Jing Yidan. Photo courtesy of the New Century of the Yangtze River

　　In this book, there is also a daughter who has endless thoughts of her mother.

Fulfill mother's wish

　　In 2015, Jing Yidan retired from CCTV. Since then, in addition to continuing to preside over some columns, she has also worked as a teacher and writer, living a happy and fulfilling life.

　　However, the bad news broke this calm. In October 2017, Jing Yidan's mother was diagnosed with cancer. Since then, Jing Yidan has been with her mother's bed and spent the last warm time with her mother.

　　At ordinary times, Jing Yidan's mother likes to keep and share life's bits and pieces, and has used letters, words, and videos to record many experiences of herself and her family. This time, I also said to her while in bed: "Write this paragraph! I can't write it."

　　Jing Yidan understood her mother's last wish, but she didn't expect it to happen so quickly. On April 27, 2019, my mother passed away forever. That day happened to be Jing Yidan's 64th birthday.

　　In extreme pain, she accepted this explanation: on the day 64 years ago, I was free from my mother for the first time; on the day 64 years later, I was free from my mother again.

　　"Mom is a person who is accustomed to recording. When she has no ability to record, I will do this." Jing Yidan decided to fulfill his mother's wishes in life, "If I don't record it in this way, I seem to It ’s hard to calm yourself down. "

Valuable record

　　The writing process is a bit difficult. Jing Yidan interrupted writing several times because of excessive sadness, "When I finally finished writing, I felt that I had completed a new understanding of life, and also completed a soul conversation with my mother."

Three-dimensional cover of "Moon Moonlight Before Bed". Photo courtesy of the New Century of the Yangtze River

　　She named her new book "Moon Moonlight Before Bed", which came to mind when she was accompanied by her mother in front of the bed when the night was quiet, "It was a very painful experience, and I felt that my mother walked into the dark little by little. But Even in the darkest moment, there is light in the last stage of life, that is, moonlight. "

　　In fact, in the process of writing this book, Jing Yidan has always had a very clear idea: the pain of loss of family can not be shared, but the experience of life can resonate.

　　For example, when a loved one is terminally ill, do you want to tell the truth? Faced with life and death, what kind of attitude should you hold? In the last stage of life, when relatives suffer great pain and heal hopelessly, what should they do?

　　Different patients, different family members, and different environments will have different choices. These are the places worth thinking about.

　　"During the writing process, I met my dear ones more clearly, met myself, and knew the blood, so even if it is painful, this kind of record is valuable." She said.

　　The death of her mother also made Jing Yidan more aware than ever of where she is in her life.

　　"I used to think that the sunset and the dusk didn't belong to me, it belonged to my parents. However, after my mother died, I felt that I was standing in the sunset at once, and I saw the moonlight and the sky at once. The step of getting dark slowly, "she said.

Only the love of parents points to parting

　　Indeed, as people often say, all love in the world points to reunion, and only the love of parents points to parting.

　　"My mother has the biggest influence on me is her attitude towards life. She is a particularly positive person with a clear mind and a sense of direction." Recalling her mother, Jing Yidan's sadness could hardly be concealed.

　　Before, Jing Yidan had compiled a book of 1,700 family letters that his mother had kept in 68 years into a book. "When I gave this book to my mother, she was doing radiotherapy. I always thought that these family letters were our most valuable asset. I hope my mother will get a kind of strength mentally when she sees it as a work. "

　　"Our children may not be able to feel that when parents grow old and slowly lose some abilities, they also need affirmation, encouragement, and appreciation, just as we often get their affirmation, encouragement, and appreciation when we were young. It's something I do that makes me feel relieved. "Jing Yidan said.

Jing Yidan. Photo courtesy of the New Century of the Yangtze River

　　For seriously ill relatives, perhaps accompany is the irreplaceable "medicine." She felt very deeply about this, "Companionship is not a visit, companionship is all over the place, in all kinds of trivialities, let our loved ones feel that you are there."

A book for tomorrow

　　After her mother died, Jing Yidan had an idea that she wanted to go to the place where her mother left more traces before she died. She always felt that there could be traces of her mother when she was young.

　　"After my mother passed away, I felt that I was facing a huge vacancy." At the beginning, Jing Yidan had a hard time accepting this kind of mental vacancy, and then slowly realized, "I have to accept this kind of vacancy, and this This kind of vacancy will always be with me. "

　　For her, the process of farewell to her mother is also a process of knowing her own life. "I think I experienced such a loss. After having such a painful recording process, I should have more cherish and yearn for life."

　　Therefore, "Moonlight Before Bed" records what happened yesterday, but it is a book written for tomorrow. Jing Yidan hopes that in the face of time and tomorrow, we'd better have more life thinking from now on.

　　"Do we really understand the word" life "?" Jing Yidan hopes that we can be more calm when facing life. "I think this is a healthy attitude towards life."

　　She wrote in the postscript of the new book: "The deceased is getting farther away, and everything left to us will maintain the temperature of life. Understanding and experience of life will help us to obtain peace in our hearts."

　　"Tear away tears, I'm going to plant flowers on the balcony, using the seeds my mother left me." (End)