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Benjamin, 27, from Rouen, wonders: "Does bisexuality really exist, do not we always have a preference anyway?" As a reminder, bisexuality consists in having a heterosexual and homosexual sexual practice. The bisexual person evolves on the masculine side and on the feminine side of herself, she seeks her blossoming on both sides. "Although the feminine is not always worn by the feminine and the masculine by the masculine," recalls Catherine White in "Without Rendez-Vous".
Does bisexuality really exist? Is there not necessarily a slight preference for one sex or the other?
I do not like the term "preference" too much. In a way, it's a game with the part that we know is not legitimate, for some people, it will be heterosexual because they feel deeply homosexual and it will be a bit of a betrayal, an infidelity, to their mode of operation. For others, it will be going towards homosexuality by feeling deeply heterosexual. So there is not a preference but rather a kind of inscription that seeks to explore something else in a rebellion.
Is a person bisexual at the beginning of his or her sexuality?
Before sexuality, we build ourselves with images, what are called imago , feminine and masculine. We build ourselves into a model inherited from dad and a model inherited from mom. This gives us two images of ourselves. When the age of two and a half, three years comes, we discover our gender. We discover it through language, that is, by the definitive attribution of the feminine or masculine pronoun.
The child hears that he is attributed the "he" as dad exclusively or "she" as mom exclusively. It is a discovery that can be painful for the child since it is as if one amputated a part of himself. All games will be possible to try to deny this gendered membership, and later that can turn into a denial of our gender belonging.
Is bisexuality more common among men or women?
This affects both sexes but it does not necessarily meet the same expectations, the same research. For example, in a heterosexual couple who has homosexual experiences, the man may be looking for something more sexual while the woman will look for something more tender.
This is not to say that female sexuality is all tenderness and male sexuality all aggression but basically, men will look for a more animal and bestial side when women expect something more mothering, more round, more listening to what she is. This reflects our ambivalence but it also reflects what is missing in the couple.
When we are bisexual, are we in a relationship with one person?
There are people who are in a relationship with one person but who, outside of their relationship, have sex with someone like them. Or the opposite, the person is in a relationship with a person of the same sex but has a heterosexual sex life. The French film Gazon Maudit also tells the three organizations. There are some people who live together very formally.
Can the flock really work?
That's the question but couples are also in the therapy offices! There is no need to be three so that it is sometimes already very complex.