When the relationship does not go well, sometimes the parties decide to stay away for a while. This can be useful for both parties, giving them a period to evaluate what they want from the relationship. But is the dimension of a period the beginning of the end?
“Relationships break down because of different situations,” says Eric Hegman, a psychotherapist from Hamburg. However, the frequent reason for this cessation is the exposure of treason.
With no constant debate about who should do the weekly shopping or when the children visit the doctor, things will be quieter. A little further away, the parties can solve the problems.
Regardless of which party decides to “take time out”, what is important is a rational approach.
"This starts with a question: Do you both really want a while yet?" Says Antie Ritter-Nissen, the couple's psychotherapist. The two sides should discuss what they expect to move away from. “Rarely, for example, one partner may consciously or unconsciously look for separation, while the other wants to reconcile.
"The remoteness period works only when both parties are willing to reform themselves and the relationship," she said.
If the distance period seems to be a good idea, the next thing to discuss is how long it will be. Psychiatrist Ludwig Schindler advises that this period be at least four weeks, warning that it will last for too long, especially if the parties do not maintain regular communication. Otherwise there will be a risk of losing the marital bond.
To avoid escalation, it is best not to deal with all problems at once. But both sides must try to find gradual solutions that will facilitate a return to the relationship.
Once the dimension period is over, the parties must decide what to do next.
"The dimension can be a new beginning," says Schindler. But not all partners succeed in returning. If the two sides fail to deal with their differences, or if one of them always wants to secede, then the distance is effectively a separation.