'smart'. The size of the knock knocking on the door of the office, the speed of opening the door and sitting in the seat, the welcoming voice tone and facial expressions, and the flow of thought observed in subsequent conversations. It is quite different from Mr. A 10 days ago. Nobody can imagine him when he first came to the hospital two months ago.

Three months ago, under heavy stress due to increased workload, Mr. A became so depressed that he had never experienced it before, and he stayed up all night, imagining the worst case scenario. I visited internal medicine because my heart was pounding and it was difficult to breathe. He couldn't do well and felt only useless, and he was criticized by everyone and eventually lay down like a corpse after retirement.

Two months after the treatment of depression, depression improved significantly, but he added the last treatment with the aim of sustained lowered motivation. This is the most rewarding moment as a doctor when you hear a testimony that you are excited and started exercising. Since not all treatments are filled with successes, this moment when I can feel 'I am doing well' is very precious to me.

Depression is a disease like a curved tunnel. Obviously there is an end, but there is no exit until just before. There are times when the path is not visible to the therapist as well as the patient. The experiences of success become the driving force to believe in themselves in the dark and to attract the patient. This short moment of exultation was immediately broken by his next words.

"My parents now stop taking pills and start working quickly. Willingness is weak and lazy, what depression is." I hear it often. Perhaps everyone wonders if they say the same thing. There are many prejudices and misconceptions about mental illness in our society, the most common being that 'depression is a matter of the will'.

This is what happened in Franz Kafka's 1915 transformation. The hero, who has worked hard for several years to support his family, finds himself turned into a bug when he wakes up. Rather than worrying about his body becoming a bug, he is worried about missing time for work. And the manager who came to his house to find out the reason for his absence leaves a saying, 'You must overcome some discomfort with passion.'

Ah, today's braids have been around since that time. At the very least, the manager looked back at the main character and just went back. No, Kafka's imagination would have been more mobilized to write the story that would have made it possible to go to work. Why is the story of a distant country 100 years ago that criticizes the reality of human alienation still a reality in our country?

Numerous studies have shown that mental illness is not a matter of will but a brain disorder. Depression in the brain's frontal lobe function is confirmed by brain imaging tests, and hormone levels such as serotonin, dopamine and norepinephrine are also confirmed. It is no different from diabetes caused by the lack of insulin in the pancreas. Both changes in depression and diabetes are invisible, but they are obviously real, and they have something in common. Only the location of the problem and the resulting symptoms are different. I can't choose the organs I'm on, but why is it so discriminating only if I have a brain problem?

Modern science, and the application of its technologies, have developed so much that it is difficult for an individual to understand all of its principles. And people tend to fear or ignore something they don't know. Even if many scientific facts about mental illnesses have been revealed, it would be a shame to say `` depression is mindful '' and to apologize because it is hurting someone.

If you don't know, don't just go in. Don't be reluctant to say that if you keep your mind and act as it is, you will get better. That's because it's a disease. Do not take medicine, say good food, exercise, do not blame yourself, you will not recover. If you are willing to lower your blood sugar and blood pressure, lower your fever, and stick broken bones, you can say proudly. Depression is a matter of the will.

# In-It # In-It #Kim Ji Yong