Amman -

A mother willingly begins to assume the responsibilities of her son to send him messages of love by doing anything about him.

After it is too late, the dependent personality begins to appear strongly, and this trait may be employed negatively in all life paths, and negatively affects the children and all family members.

Many educators fall into this trap unintentionally. The mother or the father or both of them set the trap themselves, thinking that they will seduce the son’s emotions, to be obedient to them or to one of them, and this may be a source of the son’s happiness, and this is reflected on the educators, after realizing the results in the son’s personality Or the daughter, they try to fix it, and they have difficulty, and they may not be able to do it.

What is the solution?

And how can it be realized?

Maha Bannoura: Parents compensate for their absence at home with their children with material things.

This is unhealthy (Al Jazeera)

Reliance on meeting all needs of children

On the upbringing of children and their dependence on the fathers, marital and educational relations consultant Maha Banoura says, "The upbringing of children has become different from the generation of parents to the generation of children, and from here we see some fathers and mothers, keen to meet all the children's necessary and unnecessary needs, in an excessive manner, and considering this a sign of love and tenderness from before them."

Bannoura pointed out that dependency comes when the role of the father and mother is absent in education, as well as when the child depends on the presence of help inside the home.

She explains that the working conditions that forced a large percentage of mothers and fathers to leave their homes for long hours to meet the basic needs of living;

It also had the effect of changing the nature of the relationship between children and parents, which makes parents compensate for their absence at home with their children and spend enjoyable and useful times with them to compensate children for tenderness with material things, and may be in the form of gifts or money, as the children’s view of their parents has become that their job is to obtain money , to be able to live in a certain way that fits the social norms and the environment around them.

One of the disadvantages of child dependence is the lack of social contact between family members (pixels)

Disadvantages of child dependency

Consultant Maha Bannoura mentions that one of the negative aspects of children's dependency is the lack of social contact between family members, as it was noticed that parents did not know details about their children at the academic level and their social relations.

This has had a negative impact on the children’s academic achievement, and behavioral and psychological problems they suffer due to their attachment to smart devices, and their interaction with people they do not know through social media.

She added that in recent years, we have noticed many parents who are shocked by the behavior of their children, and when they go to the competent authorities to help them, and the first sentence is said, "We no longer know our children.

It turns out, "This is what happens when children are left without parental supervision inside the home and followed up in school since childhood. The child stores all the experiences he goes through through his presence at home and school. But parents are unaware of the danger of leaving children, and not sharing the details of their lives, and building a language of dialogue between them and them." their children."

Don't wait for your son to be like you

Consultant Maha points out that this behavior is acquired from a young age, and develops over time and becomes a habit, meaning that the child is accustomed to telling his family all the details that talk to him and sharing them, and he is happy and confident that his parents listen to him and accept what he says, and always meet his needs and requirements.

She says, "Raising our children's generation in this time is no longer easy, especially with our children's openness to the outside world without restrictions, so do not wait for your son to be like you, the world and the time in which we lived is completely different from their world, so all you can do is to communicate with Your children, and this is done in special times for the children to spend quality time with them and strengthen your relationships with them.”

And she continues by saying that self-confidence, love and tenderness are things that do not conflict with your children being self-reliant. Parents, so this development must be supported and observed in a correct manner. The love of children requires us to say the word “no” in order to learn the correct behavior.

You should allocate special times for your children to spend quality time with them and strengthen your relationships with them (Pixels).

Develop communication skills

The consultant advises all parents to develop their children’s communication skills, and to expose them to life experiences that help them rely on themselves. For example, a son can be given a task to accomplish through a work environment, and receive a certain wage, so that he begins to form an idea of ​​the reality of the life he lives and its requirements.

This helps children begin to set goals in their lives, for example, "What will I be in the future?"

And “What is the right profession for me?”, and from here the individual begins to search deep inside and discover his own skills and inclinations.

According to the consultant Maha Bannoura.

And she concludes by saying, "Every person can change if he decides to do so. There is no specific age for change or development. Each of us needs help from a specialist who accompanies him in developing his abilities and skills in multiple areas, and this is what I advise parents to do for themselves and their children. The success of their children depends on social skills." They have more than certificates and degrees in a specialty.