Erotic toys for couples: the revolution of 2020
Goodbye taboos, trip to the sipper factory
It is strange now to remember, after everything that has happened.
But it really happened: when 2020 began, before the coronavirus spread, back in January, even February ... the clitoral sucker was one of the talking points in
And in many other places in the world.
A disruptive phenomenon insofar as it introduced once taboo issues into social conversation, such as masturbation, especially female masturbation, diverse sexual practices and the assumption that Spanish women had decided to take control of their pleasure.
The orgasmic circumstance culminated a process of years, perhaps a couple of decades;
A time when people went from furtively buying what we used to call vibrators -even dildos- in a dark place with neon lights to getting to know the idea of an erotic product: diaphanous places where books accompanied dildos and where pleasure was defended openly.
For the sexologist
, the experience also responds to the fact that
we have reached a certain "erotic maturity"
We begin to be aware that we are responsible for our own sexual well-being, and that erotic toys can be part of the process.
There are figures that support it.
In summer, when the
International Day of Orgasm
price comparison company
Idealo carried out a survey of habits of use in our country, and it became known that it is the place in the world where it is cheaper to buy erotic products .
"Spain is the cheapest country to buy in four of the six product categories analyzed:
dildos, lubricants, male stimulators and vibrators
They also warned of another data: "There was a
in demand for condoms in the first half of 2020."
, head of communication in Spain for the Swedish firm of erotic products LELO -which maintains the same prices anywhere in the world-
that "the conversation has transcended the sphere of the couple or friends. It is already common to hear about it openly, in the media or in other contexts, such as work, in which a few years ago it would have been unthinkable. "
In the last two years, Spaniards - toys are also used to play with a partner - have known different gadgets with different names;
sucker and Satisfyer among the best known.
Different ways and technologies to boost orgasm, alone or not.
He also reflects on the incredible change regarding sexuality that we have experienced Diana Fernández Saro, Rotella's partner in the
Spanish Association of Professionals of Sexology
(AEPS) and in charge of the Aphrodisía cabinet, as she sees positive that "men and more women women begin to value investing in pleasure. "
He believes that "the importance of sexuality in people's well-being is becoming increasingly important and that talking about erotic toys at work or family meals helps to remove the taboo of talking about sex."
But sexology warns: "The consumption of erotic toys does not lead to greater satisfaction."
What cannot happen is that, "in circles of friends it begins to look bad not having or not being in favor of erotic toys".
"There is a lot of
" says Fdez. Saro, "and also a lot of ignorance."
And while speaking openly certainly increases sex education and outreach, it is not the goal for people to initiate practices that they may not be prepared for.
There is no obligation to know what
, what it is about is to be happy with the relationships that you enjoy.
And have pleasure, of course.
Soraya Wave 2, the latest LELO product.
"Not everything is good, it can generate discomfort in people who
to have pleasure with toys and do not have it otherwise. There are women who have toys but do not use them because they do not find it funny, who use them alone because they or their partners feel uncomfortable, or vice versa, who see it as an ally and a support in bed.
The toy does not give orgasm, it is an instrument, it is our body that produces pleasure
", recalls this professional who, in her therapies, tries to inoculate, fundamentally, that in sex, as in everything in life, the maxim is "respect."
Both analog and digital.
In these times of health risks, also mental,
sexology and psychology insist on the idea of care and, especially, self-care
And that's where sexual well-being comes in too.
, a specialist in non-normative sexualities and also in the rise of the erotic product, wishes us the following: "Think about toys beyond the usual use, or the use for which they are sold to us, almost all of them are designed also for encounters with someone else, and that is enriching, because it makes us grow ".
In other words, "see it as an option and not as an obligation", no matter how much society talks about this being what is done now.
Decide, after all.
And use it if we like.
"Confinement has been a stress test in many couples," warns Rotella, "and one of the few ways to cope with how complicated 2020 is is through pleasure, at all levels, also erotic."
In consultation, Rotella encourages couples to enjoy "a field trip."
"We give them several addresses of erotic products stores and we ask them to make visits. The objective is not so much the purchase but the entertainment and the promotion of relaxed and relaxed and even fun conversation about their own and shared pleasure; , that they stir, that the possibilities are fixed and then they go to have a drink and chat about what they have seen, it is an excellent way to integrate erotic pleasure in the relationship and to give it the right importance: the toy is not a substitute for anything , it is simply a complement ".
This is how Gooding also speaks from LELO: "We must banish that mistaken belief that erotic toys will end up replacing people. There are some specially designed to be used as a couple, such as IDA or TIANI 3. Sexuality must be lived freely. As long as we respect the rest, what's the problem in trying new things? "
The firm that Gooding represents in our country, together with the sexologist
, also a member of the AEPS, presented its latest product this week, Soraya Wave 2, a vibrating bunny with eight speeds that, as explained by Tasso herself on a wheel of
, "allows double orgasms", the stimulation of the clitoris and the G-spot at the same time.
According to a survey carried out by LELO, "83% of Spanish users of erotic toys recognize that their orgasms are more intense when they use these products, compared to penetration or manual stimulation".
Which does not mean, of course, that Spaniards are not making love, or having regular sex, no matter how much 2020 is the year of distance sex and erotic toys.
According to a survey carried out by the brand of products Control on the occasion of Columbus Day, "more than 30% have sex once a week and 29.5% two or three times a week, 56.5% have sex consider fiery and passionate in bed and about 40% claim to be the most fun, while 38.7% of Spaniards practice anal sex, 34.6% use a vibrator and more than 30% like to tie or be tied during the sexual act ".
And how is this used?
"Sometimes it is still difficult to imagine the operation or purpose of some toys. Especially those that respond to less visible desires in society."
It is explained by the sexologist Norma Ageitos, used to answering questions from those who want to start in this universe.
Erotic toys usually carry their corresponding "information on specifications and modes of use", Alberto Gooding from LELO points out.
"One of the most frequent questions is how to clean them and how long. Just put them under warm tap water and wash with soap. Always after each use."
An important fact: many toys are unisex, they are not only for men or only for women but for both.
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