TESTIMONY
It has been eight months since Mélanie began a relationship with her new companion. She was flabbergasted to discover that the latter continued to be active on a dating application on her back. Mélanie does not understand why her partner uses this kind of application, when their relationship became serious. At the microphone of "La Libre antenne" on Europe 1, Mélanie tells Olivier Delacroix about her disappointment and wonders about the future of her relationship.
>> Listen to Mélanie's testimony in full here
"I am 43 years old. I have been divorced for three years. I am slowly trying to rebuild my life. For the past eight months, I have started a relationship with someone with whom I get on very well and who cares for me. returned to want to believe after a difficult separation. All the hopes that I had founded in this relation were shattered a week ago. I discovered that this man continued to discuss with other women on dating apps.
I realized it completely by chance. I was sleeping with him that night. When I got up, I went to say hello and next to him his phone was open on an application that I knew. I had used it myself last year, I immediately recognized the design of the application. I was stunned, so I was unable to say anything at the time. I left with all my questions and my disappointment.
" Maybe he just wants to reassure himself by going to this site "I recreated an account on the application, without photo, by changing my first name and putting a sentence that would hook it. I created this account to see if I found his profile. I found it. I didn't think it would go any further. Unfortunately, he too liked my profile and started chatting with this fake person. Just when he liked my fake profile, he called me to find out how I was doing. It ended there. I preferred to delete the profile.
The next day he called me and surprised, he will give me the keys to his house. It is a strong sign, but so paradoxical. I haven't discussed it with him yet. Maybe this app is a game for him, maybe he remembered that in reality he had someone who loved him. He lacks self-confidence, maybe he just wants to reassure himself by going to this site?
" He doesn't want me to go back to his family "We never talked about our expectations in the future. We lived our relationship day by day without wondering if we wanted to live together and create a blended family. We've been together for eight months, but I don't plan to have a blended family yet. My kids know I have someone, but they never saw him. Him, I feel that he does not want me to return to his family. What can be understood at the start of the relationship.
In my opinion, he prefers to flee rather than having to live a new family life. He just wants the moments when we are both. When he has his children, he is all theirs. It's all to his credit, he's a good father. When I have my kids, I will still have a thought for him. He is able to forget me during the whole period when he has his children. Then he completely changes his behavior and is much more present.
>> Find Olivier Delacroix's Free Antenna in replay and podcast here
With this site story, I see that there is another problem. Either he is with me, but waiting for someone better, or I am not enough for him. I take it for myself, I tell myself that there is something I am not doing well. He told me about his parents who were divorced themselves. He told me that his parents had managed very well, because they each made a new life but did not live with their respective companions. I immediately understood that this was his model: everyone at home, each his children and each his problems. "