TESTIMONY
Jean-Pierre lost his uncle who was dear to him last October. His uncle helped him overcome the trauma of the sexual touching that his father subjected him to. He was a big brother figure to him. The latter was ill and suffered from personality disorders. At the microphone of "La Libre antenne" on Europe 1, Jean-Pierre evokes this mourning which causes him a lot of pain, and tells Olivier Delacroix how his uncle helped him in his life.
>> Listen to Jean-Pierre's testimony in full here
"I lost my uncle on October 10. He was 49 years old. His carer and his nurse found him in his bed. He had had a mental illness since the death of his mother. He was my godfather. He made me love the cinema. He brought me to CAMSP (Center d'Action Médico-Sociale Precoce) when I lost my voice because of my father who touched me sexually at the age three and eight years old. I miss my grandparents too. They brought me everything. They raised me almost, because when my mother worked, I went to my grandparents.
" The judge asked me if I wanted to have my father sentenced "My father did this to me in the family home in Burgundy. A judgment has been pronounced. I had to see him in a guarded place, and he started again in this guarded place. He was drinking. He hit me and my mother. My mother believed me because she saw me in tears, with cockades in my eyes. She took me to the family doctor who wrote a letter to the judge. The judge asked me if I wanted to convict my father.
At eight, I didn't know what to think. I said we shouldn't condemn him. So it was decided that he should be kept away from me. He did everything to see me. He was sick, he had tongue cancer because he smoked a lot. Then we went further to Burgundy with my mother and my father-in-law. But at the time my stepfather was drinking and hitting me. I was in boarding school, it is the luck which I had. I had an educator specializing in IME (Medico-educational Institute).
" I call him every night thinking he will drop out "I saw my uncle when his dad died in 2018. We were talking by phone. He was very important to me. He brought me everything, like a big brother. We didn't have much age difference. He had suffered from a personality disorder since the death of his mother in 2004. He took himself for a chef, for an educator, for a lot of people. It was difficult to communicate with him because he had to juggle between true and false.
He was under guardianship. When his tutor called me to tell me that he had died, I made him repeat twice. I returned to Dijon thanks to my sisters. I went to the brewing. I still can't believe he left. The same day I called all his friends, all the people who mattered to him. I wrote a letter that was read by someone I know who knew him very well. I call him every night thinking that he will pick up or call me. Now it tells me that the line is not assigned.
" He was talking about death all the time "He was very depressed. He was talking about death all the time. He wanted to join his mom. I blame myself because I felt he was depressed. His friends did not come to see him. He had a psychiatrist, a liberal nurse, a person who did the housework, a person who took him for a race. The best, in my opinion, was that he should go to a home, because he was not independent. But it was too early to leave.
He made me love cinema. He liked the James Bond very much. He made me love DVDs. I don't know how many he had. He offered me film encyclopedias. He made me love everything. If I was able to survive my father, it was largely thanks to him, my grandparents and my spiritual father that I met in EMI and who left because of cancer. I wrote in my text: 'When I look at the stars, you will watch over me'.
>> Find Olivier Delacroix's Free Antenna in replay and podcast here
At the moment I don't know anyone in Marseille, so I feel alone. It's difficult. My friends are rather in Dijon. It's difficult to contact them. It's by phone or SMS, but it's not like it's real. I don't know who to talk to about my uncle. I have two sisters, but one is very busy with her work and the other became a mom on December 5. My father and my paternal grandparents, I don't regret them at all because of what happened. I do not feel sad. But my grandparents, my uncle and my spiritual father, it was something strong that bound us. "