When does comparing yourself with others make sense?

We often tend to compare ourselves with our friends and co-workers, because they can help us move forward. However, be careful of these social comparisons.

In a report published by the American magazine "Fast Company", the writer Art Markman said that when he participated in a city-wide race on rowing machines and competing with more efficient participants, his plan was to focus only on his performance and ignore the hustle and bustle surrounding him.

In this context, the writer clarified that the situation in which he included many of the ways in which we use social comparisons to motivate ourselves throughout the life stages, through these comparisons a person measures himself - to a large extent - the extent of success of others or their faults.

Types of comparisons
There are two types of social comparisons. In the first place, there are progressive comparisons in which you compare yourself with a better person, and that may make you feel dissatisfied.

On the other hand, descending comparisons are formed when you compare yourself with someone worse than you, and although they may make you feel better, they may arouse feelings of pity for you.

And if escalating social comparisons make you unhappy with yourself, penetration into them may be a bad thing. However, by taking the right position, it can be really helpful.

In other words, dissatisfaction creates the energy that can be harnessed to achieve the best, if there are no obstacles to doing so, and this means that you should have some ability to control your destiny rather than being influenced by external factors. Besides, you should make sure that making the effort to develop yourself would either limit or exclude successfully the difference between you and that other person.

When you compare yourself to a job analyst very much like you, or someone on social media, his efforts and successes can motivate you to progress. However, be careful because social comparisons may weaken your resolve.

You can always find someone who is more successful than you, doing something you wish to do. If you do not find a suitable way to achieve the same level of success, this may actually lead to you not achieving anything.

Focus on what you want
When social comparisons are discouraging, shift your focus backward by focusing on being better than you are, and you can encourage yourself to progress. But to make these internal comparisons successful, you must decide what you want.

It is not enough to say in general, "I want to be a better person next year, compared to what I was this year."

You have to focus specifically on how you want to be better, then take actions that will lead you to develop.

The author pointed out that when applying these internal comparisons, it is useful to have a written record of your previous performance in order to have a specific goal to achieve, without anything written, it is easy to forget what you did in the past.

On the other hand, downward social comparisons are not helpful if you are trying to motivate yourself to new heights, yet they may have two benefits.

First - when you feel exploited, you will realize that there are other people worse than you, a comparison can help you refocus your progress.

Second - When you move forward with your career, you may want to find opportunities to guide others, and finding people who strive to succeed without yet succeeding in your career may remind you. Therefore, providing a helping hand can be equally stimulating.