Men are big children ... husbands are more stressful for women than children

Farida Ahmed

"A man is a big child," a saying that was frequently repeated on many tongues without scientific support, until science actually demonstrated that men do not reach maturity except when they are middle-aged, and that they cause more stress on their wives than their children.

Children are less troublesome
A survey conducted by the TODAY site on seven thousand mothers, in which they rated their average stress level by 8.5 out of 10, revealed that men contributed the most to the wife’s stress compared to children, and 46% of wives stated that children generate less stress and tension than their husbands, with Confirm that the matter is not related to treason or ill-treatment.

Delayed maturity of the man
Not having enough help from the husband is a major source of daily stress, as three-quarters of the women in the survey indicated that it falls on them the daily burden of motherhood, parenting, and the family without any involvement of the husband.

The woman endures the daily work inside the house from cleaning and preparing meals, raising children, and most of them work full-time outside the home, while the man is satisfied with working outside the house leaving the other half to the woman alone, and spends most of the time relaxing.

The delay in maturity in men is another reason that makes them more dependent on women and therefore more stressful for them.

In a study on differences in maturity between the sexes, conducted by the company "Nickelodeon UK", published by the British newspaper "Telegraph", it was revealed that the stage of maturity in men starts at the age of 43 years, i.e. 11 years after the maturity of women, who start that stage in Early thirties.

Interestingly, eight out of ten women believe that men never stop being children, which negatively affects their marital relationship, and surprisingly, one out of four men confirmed this, and indicated that women in their lives are more mature than them.

And immaturity is represented in several practices performed by men, including video game addiction Jim, driving a car very quickly, the inability to cook simple meals, changing jobs regularly, bragging about how to attract girls, as well as relying on the mother to wash clothes, prepare meals and replace the wife It later.

Immaturity may cause a woman to experience fatigue and permanent anger, as she must make important decisions in a single relationship such as dividing the budget, paying bills, and supplies necessary to purchase, which is indicated by a quarter of women in the study sample, and the same percentage wished that she could speak with her husband Matured about how you feel and what the relationship needs to develop and succeed.

How to reduce some of its burdens?

The marital relationship needs to continue and succeed, to reduce the burden on the wife, and to consider participation in the care of children and cleaning the house as an essential part of the relationship and not an optional matter for the man, and specialists suggest a number of solutions that contribute to relieving the stress on the wife, including:

1- Division of household burdens

Women bear three times the burden of their husbands' work, according to "Psychology Today", and it is interesting that these proportions remain the same, regardless of whether the wife has a full-time job, and whether her husband works or does not work.

The authors of the study indicate that if a man resides in a house with another colleague, then he realizes that housework is a necessary and compulsory thing for both, but he is simply with his wife placing it on her shoulders, and he gets the title of a good husband if he helps her, stressing that if it is not dealt with Equitable and equal with housework, it can negatively affect other aspects of the relationship and be a major cause of marital problems.

2- Free time
Women bear many burdens and burdens, feel guilty when they fail, and endless work cause them a lot of fatigue, and according to a survey conducted by the British National Statistics Office published by the newspaper "The Independent", the free time for women is less than men because although women work part-time More than men, they spend more time completing unpaid work such as housework and childcare.

Here comes the man’s role in increasing the free time of the woman by completing the tasks of the house, and taking care of the children to have a quiet free time that helps her relax and internal peace.

3- Stop dealing as a child
The man behaves like a child until the age of 43, according to the study "Nickelodeon UK", and it cannot be considered pleasant or funny from the point of view of the wife who finds herself bearing the burden of another child who appears in the thirties of age, but he behaves like a child at the age of seven, as it becomes more stressful, She tries to control everything and focus more with children's mistakes and not to overcome them.

It is preferable for the relationship to stop the husband from dealing as a child, and to take the responsibility, especially in raising children, in a mature manner, and to agree with the mother on the broad lines of education and adherence to them, and to reduce the burden on mothers in a number of tasks, such as children's exercises, visiting doctors, and studying lessons, then. Mothers can stop focusing on the mistakes their children make, stop trying to control everything, and have fun with the children and husband.