EUROPE 1 ACCOMPANES YOU
Some people are in the evening, others in the morning. And it is not always easy for a couple to provide a moment of intimacy during which the two partners are fully in desire of each other. At the microphone of Mélanie Gomez, in the show Sans Rendez-Vous , on Europe 1, the sexologist and psychoanalyst Catherine White explains why it is important to manage to grant his libido with that of his or her partner.
Isabelle's question
"I have been in a relationship for a month and am perfectly happy and in love, but there is a big misunderstanding between us that threatens the stability of our couple: I need to sleep! My friend hears a flight, a dislike, when he would like to make love every night and stretch out our evenings for more fellowship, what do you think? "
Catherine Blanc's answer
"There are people who are more comfortable in the morning, others in the evening.Some people, early in the morning, have high dopamine, are alert and ready to start this wonderful impulse that is sexuality, when others find it more difficult, some couples find it difficult to get along because one of them is struggling to get out of bed, others fall in the evening and fall asleep to be dynamic.
Is it normal to want to make love every night?
Some people have more trouble falling asleep than others because it can be a time of anxiety. However, in the face of anxiety, some people need to be reassured. They are not necessarily more sexual desire than their partner, but they use sexuality to reassure themselves.
We must be able to find compromises, a time when we are not allergic to the time of the other. Doing this before dinner, for example, can be more enjoyable. [...] It's not an obligation to give in to each other's rhythm, but we also have to adapt from time to time. Otherwise, this schedule story can become a power struggle.
This shift in libido can he put the couple in danger?
He who can not sleep, eaten up by anxiety, may refuse that the other sleeps. Now, a person who sleeps beside you proves that she loves you, because she is confident enough to give up all her defenses and fall asleep. And yet, the one who has trouble sleeping, who hears the deep breathing of the other in his sleep of the just, feels abandoned. In the name of sexuality and love, he claims an intention, whereas it is only anxiety that expresses itself.
The argument 'I do not want to make love because I'm sleepy' is legitimate. But, depending on the 'level of tyranny' of the other's anxiety, it is not always audible. This is where the risk is for the longevity of the couple. "