I am the second student
In 2010, the yellow light (in the third row) and Chinese class students. Respondents provide
It is not realistic to clearly describe the faces of two students. As of June 30, 2020, there were 3,005 higher education institutions nationwide, including 1,258 undergraduate colleges. The well-known "985" and "211" accounted for more than 100 seats, but they have long occupied the focus of media discussions. Students below and below are blurred background boards.
This hidden group is the background of the majority of ordinary college students in China. To a certain extent, this group's possibility of fulfilling the aspirations of life marks the real scene of this rapidly evolving society.
ordinary
The obvious young, inexperienced faces were thrown in front of Professor Huang Deng like darts. She taught for 15 years at Guangdong F College, and 4500 names appeared on her roster. She wrote a book "My Two Students" for the students. Huang Deng realized, "The students of the two colleges, to a certain extent, reflect the situation of most ordinary young people, their destiny, and outline the most common growth path of young groups."
Huang Deng said that they are like fixed anchors, making her the most convenient observation of the national conditions.
The two schools surrounded by forest are used as the stage in the book. It is 20 kilometers away from the Canton Tower "Xiaoman Yao". Students prefer to refer to it as "Guang F", omitting the word "College". Like a specialist.
In the summer of 2005, Shen Yixing received the admission letter from this university and felt that the fate of himself and his family would be profoundly changed. He was the first college student in the village, and the family members of the neighboring village set off wine to celebrate the major events in the history of education in this humble village in southern China.
He wandered in the fields as a teenager, looking forward to seeing something new. The ripe fragrance of fruits, the decayed acidity of leaves and the smell of dried crop straws waft in the air. He grew seedlings, cut rice, picked manure, and cut trees, and developed the original power to withstand the frictions of life.
When Shen Yixing entered school, the total scale of various higher education nationwide exceeded 23 million, ranking first in the world. In these two schools, Huang Deng found that most of the students were from townships. Behind him was a working mother, a laid-off father, and siblings who were not yet adults. Although it is impossible to compete with peers in first-tier cities, Kochi families, and famous schools, admission to college is still regarded as a ticket to change fate.
After the 1980s, Shen Yixing was considered a "first-generation left-behind child." His parents went to Dongguan to sell meat when he was in the third grade of elementary school. Every day, he called from the "World Factory" and told him to "read well." Let them believe that the telephone line played a lifting role.
With the yearning for the university and the request to change the fate of the family, Shen Yixing stood under the signboard of Guangdong F College and found that the biggest feature of the two schools is ordinary.
"Cut, it's so small." Less than half an hour after I had walked through the campus, he had the impression that the university needs to ride a bicycle, but it is not used here. Shen Yixing said that the library of the new school is not as big as a high school and its location is scarce.
Large and small playgrounds, dormitories for four and six rooms, and old teaching buildings with yellow plywood conjoined tables. The stools make a harsh noise at any time. The students crackle for a long time after the class, and the silver-grey iron door is like a warehouse. For the gate, heavy iron locks are welded with iron bars.
The spiritual temperament that the university preaches seems to become more practical here. Compared with the Nobel Prize winners and foreign presidents invited by famous universities, the guests invited to these two schools to give lectures were "more grounded."
Guangdong F College emphasizes the cultivation of application-oriented talents, and various skill certificates are included in "Innovation Credits". "Innovation and Entrepreneurship Ability Level Rating Certificate", "Accounting Practice Qualification Certificate", "Logistics Qualification Certificate", "Secretary's Professional Qualification Certificate"... There are also "driving licenses" that help students graduate.
In order to have one more bargaining chip in competitiveness, the school adds instrumental courses, and students are keen on textual research. Chinese majors also have to take economics and finance courses, but the coverage is too wide and often cannot be learned in depth. "I know that in key universities, students have many opportunities to obtain academic information, and there is also a very good academic atmosphere to inspire students to form teams to discuss some real academic issues." Huang Lan said, "In our financial atmosphere is strong, emphasis on application Sexual colleges and universities, sometimes after a heavy rain of classroom knowledge, it seems to be drenched by a scoop of water, which seems to be dripping, but all knowledge points will disappear smoothly after the ringing of the class bell. After the final exam, the textbooks It was originally given back to the teacher."
Shen Yixing read economics, "Everything is learned, nothing is fine." He remembers someone saying that if the management can be achieved in the future, this knowledge is bragging capital. If you have been at the grassroots level, others will only think you are exaggerated.
Most of the students were silent and well-formed, and no student had ever argued with the yellow light because of insisting on their own ideas. "In the specific classroom, I fully feel that education is like a chronic inflammation. Strong medicines, antibiotics, hormones, in the university era, finally bear the consequences of indifference, indifference, non-thinking, and inactivity."
Shen Yixing skipped classes, played ball games, skipped courses, re-entered the exam, and sometimes had a meal at noon until 12 o'clock in the evening and continued to grill beer. That was the era of Nokia and desktop computers, and the boys were so excited when they watched the live broadcast of the NBA. In the senior year, a group of boys joked at the archway in the village of the city, "Dare not say what they have learned in the four years of college, but they must have made due contributions to the local economic development."
Until the second semester of junior year, he began to feel the pressure of graduation. The brothers took off their dirty T-shirts and flip-flops and put on white shirts and black pants for interviews. The teacher talked to Shen Yixing and warned him that he would not be able to obtain a degree certificate if he had too many subjects. A flash of light made the farmer sober, he could not lose his identity as a college student.
The yellow light became a college student in 1995. She graduated from Yueyang University. According to the current division, it is equivalent to two schools. That year, the number of enrolled students in universities nationwide was 926,000. Since then, colleges and universities have expanded their enrollment, and within 10 years, the colleges where Huang Deng has worked have expanded from two classes to six classes, and college dormitories have been packed with more beds to replace desks.
In an era when college students did not embrace the market, Huang Deng accepted his assignment after graduation and entered the largest textile factory in Asia, where he worked as a secretary, accountant, organizational officer and front-line worker. In 1997, the Hong Kong financial turmoil, she became a laid-off worker, determined to postgraduate.
She didn't tell her family that she had lost her job, and she cooked for others to make money while fighting for the opportunity to continue school. "I didn't even buy all the books at the time, let alone the tutoring classes." In the end, she was admitted to Wuhan University. The day the notice came down, the whole factory was discussing a female worker committing suicide because she was laid off, which is a very strong contrast.
"You think your destiny has changed since then." Many years later, she began to wonder whether the fate of students in this extremely ordinary two schools can be changed by a notice.
Bottom
The unreliable expectations on the diploma are increasingly cruelly exchanged for value in the labor market. The traditional job positions of Guangdong F College are in financial institutions, but the graduates who are sent out of the pipeline each year fill the gaps in the career map.
"I have leather shoes oil that can never be wiped, tea leaves that can be eaten, red dates that can not be eaten, silk quilts, shampoos in my office, all from the sales of students. In my daily consumption, some skin care products, small Jewelry and formal bags come from students." Huang Lan said.
A student of Huang Deng did the tattoo industry, "all are routines. Low-cost projects can be packaged into tens of thousands or even millions of yuan. Beauty matching metaphysics, such as tattoos, must be with people If there is a fortune-telling relationship, there will be a lot of people hooked." Students who open restaurants are in a situation where they don’t ask people to be busy, but there is no profit to invite people. Many times, he has to go in person and deliver the takeaway to someone who may be in a similar situation. "Life has been controlled, life has been controlled by money."
Some students have been tricked into pyramid schemes, and they have rejected the unspoken rules of the workplace and the blind dates introduced by their families. They just struggled to get ahead after graduating. Now they just want to find a copy with four or five days a month and a little income. Work, find a boyfriend to marry and give birth to a child, live an ordinary life, but can not do so, and eventually gave birth to mental illness.
Huang Deng sighed that a girl who bumped into the wall everywhere in reality, just because she did not want to compromise with reality, had never won a small breakout.
A girl desperately wanted to cry, "I also thought about walking awkwardly, where is there a god-daddy person, help me find a job, let me settle down, then I will pursue my dreams, and then improve myself" .
Huang Deng said that the pressure on college students is much greater now. In her university class, 70% of the students in the class came from the countryside. After passing the college entrance examination, they did change their survival and destiny. Most of them not only obtained a stable career, but also enjoyed the housing allocated by the unit in the planned economy era (or bought the housing when the price was low. ), can easily take root in the city, and become the pillar of their families, fully enjoy the extremely high cost performance brought by the university diploma.
After the expansion of enrollment, college students have fallen from "the pride of heaven" into the world, and many ordinary laborers around them may have a depreciated university graduation certificate. The students were forced to a desperate situation, and the only object they could start with was themselves.
Mo Xiao is a 2015 student of Huangdeng. He graduated with 8.4 million people, and he became unemployed as soon as he graduated. He was born in 1995, is not tall, and has a great passion for writing in his thin body. He insists on writing every day, "I want to be a good writer."
After graduating last year, Mo Xiao found a job in an educational institution. After training, he found that he was just a teaching machine, so he resigned. When he was unemployed, his cousin found him to start a business and do a car steering wheel modification. "It was a hard time during that time. I went to bed at two or three every night and got up at six or seven in the morning to pull customers." Soon the epidemic came, there was no list, and the rent had to be paid.
He started as a part-time job, waiters, courier sorters, security guards, teaching assistants, staring at the recruitment website every day, do part-time job. I have also encountered part-time group scammers and asked everyone to pay 5 yuan. After hundreds of people paid the group, they were dissolved.
He worked as a security guard in the scenic area. His clothes were large. "I'm a security guard. Others protect me." Colleagues saw him as thin and young, and gave him light jobs. For the first time as a waiter in a restaurant, he could not accept it psychologically. Later, he felt that it was not shameful to be able to feed himself. He slowly thickened his face and thickened his arms because of the dishes.
The sorting and courier work is done from 6 pm to 6 am the next morning, during which they often bend over and stare at the different alphanumeric lines on the assembly line. A girl came to work in shorts, reprimanded by the supervisor in public, and a row of boys laughed secretly. "I really feel sad. I just came to work part-time. After today I patted my ass and walked away. I have at least an education. She doesn't do this job, and she may not be able to eat."
Mo Xiao later discovered that he was the one who could not afford to eat. After paying 600 yuan in rent, he had no money in his pocket. He stayed in the room for a long time without going out, and suddenly walked outside, hearing the sound of motorcycles, vocals, horns, anxious. Once when he ate, he burst into tears, "I finally understand what it means to be hard."
He wants to be strong, not asking for money at home, to avoid adding to the problem. Dad had several illnesses and the operation cost more than one hundred thousand yuan. My sister didn't know what the reason was to borrow a net loan of more than 100,000 yuan. Life is not the same as this family, and the road is turned. Father's hair is completely white overnight, like a snow cap on his head.
25-year-old Mo Xiao wanders part-time. "I haven't stood firm yet after graduation, so I will run away. Suddenly taking responsibility, I feel so tired." The bruises of the family extended to his thin body, forcing him to be strong.
When he was in college, Mo Xiao and his brother in the dormitory suddenly wanted to ride to Hunan. The route was not checked, and the bicycles were borrowed. The two boys tanned a layer of skin on the road. There was no one on the mountain that day, and the night was shrouded, and the two could only ride in darkness until the lights flashed in the distance, and he almost cried.
Mo Xiao didn't know how many mountains he had to climb after graduation to see that light. His friends who rode together were admitted to the civil servants in Meizhou. They were busy with epidemic prevention and control recently. For a long time, Mo Xiao's life has not changed, just like the machine humming in a low and constant way.
toss
Huang Deng used pens to record many hard-working college students. She said, "The starting point of the two colleges may make them unknown, but no one denies that the efforts of countless individuals are quietly changing the fate of the group and in fact promoting the society. Stand more firmly."
Before graduation, most students are anxious. Some students listened to "The Great Compassion Mantra" when the mood was low, but it worked. "I don't eat meat anymore. I'm a Buddhist girl. Let me meditate. I will still be restless for the future."
Ten years ago, almost no students in the yellow light class had postgraduate entrance exams; now, postgraduate entrance exams have become the most popular choice, followed by civil servants. Like a pair of parallel parallel bars, the exam and postgraduate are the fulcrums from which two students can get ahead.
Starting at 5 o'clock in the morning, a team formed gradually outside the cafeteria. Because the library and classrooms are limited, the school changed the first floor of the cafeteria into a self-study room, and later expanded the first floor, so that students preparing for the postgraduate examination can smell the smell of meals.
The school attaches great importance to the postgraduate entrance examination. Some students report that there is often noise in the movement of the tables and chairs in the cafeteria upstairs. The school has added a layer of cushions to the tables and chairs. People walking in the "postgraduate self-study area" will consciously lighten their steps.
Even with the remodeled cafeteria, it still can't accommodate the army of postgraduates. People who can't find a location wander in the stairwell of the teaching building or the rooftop of the dormitory. Someone learned a semester at the turn of the stairs to contend with the sultry heat and mosquitoes in the south.
Among all the students, Huang Deng hopes that Lin Feng will be admitted to graduate school. Starting from high school, Lin Feng fell into the martial arts world and wrote a few million words of martial arts novels. Each protagonist was assigned a certain characteristic of his own. After 10 years of work, his avatar is still Linghu Chong.
The pride of others is exposed like a skin disease and is very sensitive, but his pride is hidden deep. He doesn't talk much, and he doesn't deliberately manage relationships. The first college entrance examination failed, and after one year of repetition, he was admitted to Guangdong F College. "In the countryside, either you really work hard or you rely on reading." Two months before the college entrance examination, his father hurt his finger while working. Grandpa was not in good health when he was hospitalized. When filling in the volunteers, my father came out from the hospital to discuss with him how to choose the school. Before the exam, his father was discharged from the hospital and stayed with him at home throughout the exam, allowing him to quietly finish the college entrance examination.
In his view, people rely on two things to achieve their goals, money and will. Without the former, he must do well in the latter. Huang Deng commented, "Lin Feng is a person who is really attracted by interests, a person with goals and dreams. Among the thousands of students I have taught, it is rare and difficult to find." At university, some teachers highly recommended him To study Zhuangzi.
This boy born in the village of Sihui, Guangdong, loves movies and wanted to go to a film company when he graduated, but after approaching, he found that there was too much help to turn his interest into a career. "Film directors want to make literary films, but 80% of them are commercial films." Some students are keen to participate in the student union that can make their resumes bright. He ran as a young volunteer and graduated to find a job for a nonprofit organization. No, and finally entered the bank in line with the trend. He likes to be alone, but is forced to deal with people.
After working in the bank for one year, he decided to take the civil service exam. "The civil service examination does not require '985"211', which is an opportunity for ordinary college students." After the gold content of the diploma was diluted, the students rushed to another seemingly fair track.
Lin Feng finally entered an organization of the Fourth Society. "The reason for applying for this unit is mainly because it recruits more people and it is easier to take the exam." In the high-walled unit, he does not have to dress himself up as another person to please others. More importantly, the salary is stable here, giving him more time to think about which way to go in the future.
"A family with a bad family like me must go out to work after graduation and continue to study and only wait for himself to make money." At the moment, he still insists on the examination of graduate students. "At least keep yourself in the heart of learning, don't let the society assimilate." Every When he was excited when he received the salary, he always said that he was too assimilated by the society, "full of copper smell".
He remembered that the night before graduation, everyone made an appointment all night and the brothers chatted in the corridor. At midnight, the crowd gradually became sleepy. Lin Feng’s headphones had been repeatedly playing a song. Hong Kong and Taiwan singer Chen Baiqiang’s “Plucking the Stars”, “I want to embark on the road...I want to pick the stars without being a captive”. He listened and fell asleep, the feeling can not find words to describe.
Mo Xiao and Lin Feng graduated 10 years apart, but they share the same feeling. Mo Xiao told the writer's dream to everyone around him when he was in college. "If you want to be a writer, you shout loudly, and someone can always hear your voice."
At the seminar, he heard a writer show off his flyers and experience life. Mo Xiao, who has done various part-time jobs, was angry. "When did the distribution of leaflets become the standard of poor life? Are writers now so respected and treated well." He feels that there is no difference between writers and scavengers. One is to classify materials. One classifies garbage. He feels talented in this respect, but not so big.
Writing brought happiness to Mo Xiao. He wrote a novel beginning. He was so excited that he couldn't fall asleep all night. He posted 4 circles of friends, and all of them were changed to be visible only to him. At the beginning of the preparation for the postgraduate entrance examination, leaning on three snickers and two bottles of water, he wrote from 9 am to 10 pm. The process was easy and did not feel pressure. When he stood up after the writing, he slammed on the seat.
After failing the postgraduate entrance examination, he quit his job at an educational institution. Mo Xiao voted for hundreds of resumes. He voted for the public account and wrote a complete work of tens of thousands of words without any response. He also voted for a film and television company, writing several short scripts and making videos a day, "Some companies steal your ideas, but don't want you."
Hundreds of resumes can be exchanged for less than 10 interview opportunities. "I am most afraid that I can't pass the resume. The second one is a Kaner." Life is like a novel, full of coincidences. As the shadow of the epidemic faded away, it became easier for him to get a job. Not long ago, he joined an editor of a science and technology journal, watched his name become printed on paper, and lamented that "the daughter-in-law has been a wife for many years." He took a picture of the magazine and sent it to a circle of friends, and circled his name in a red pen. "Because it's unremarkable, I want to draw a circle."
This journal belongs to the school enterprise of Sun Yat-sen University. "My colleagues around me are basically graduate students from the best schools in Guangdong Province." Everyone talked about school majors during dinner. Mo Xiao never talked before. Now, he thinks clearly. "In the future, I will be the first to say that I belong to Guangdong F College. I am not afraid of embarrassment."
Life is showing a good side. While writing, he is working. When he meets the flyers on the way, he will definitely pick them up.
friction
After graduation, Shen Yixing was content to act as a gear on a machine.
His chic college life ended with a casual meal. The girls cried a lot, and Shen Yixing did not feel partingly worried, "We are ignorant, we don't care about drinking." He began to yearn for a new life, to work, no longer asking for money from his parents.
His first job was with a logistics company. It was 2009, and the financial crisis had just passed. The logistics boss came directly to the school to recruit people, as if to take it seriously. "Positioning us is the company's key talent." Shen Yixing resigned after serving for two months. "The boss is going to set up the aviation department, let us engage in air transportation, and overestimates the ability of our two students, even our English is not measured." No one led the way, Shen Yixing retired.
He later took part in the bank's unified recruiting, invested in his hometown of Heyuan, and went to work in the township. "All of my family do small business, there are those who sell clothing and fruits, and my parents sell meat at stalls. I also want to engage in these, and they have better marketing methods than them." When graduating, Shen Yixing went to the local department store 1. Supermarket interviews to continue the family business, but his parents advised him to enter the system.
"My parents get up at 3 or 4 every day for 20 years and haven't slept well. They feel that the system does not suffer from this kind of suffering, and those who eat public food have a much higher social status. They think that it is only a matter of time before they enter a state-owned enterprise and get married and have children ."
Shen Yixing successfully entered the bank, starting from the small township staff, seconded to the big city step by step, and now "throwing his wife and his son" on a business trip across the province, only a few days home a month. He said that he had a "Xiaoqiang spirit" at the bottom who was unwilling to lose. He had the courage to rub his face against the ground and smile again. He transformed from a shy college student into a sociable financial practitioner.
A long-awaited promotion was almost determined to belong to him. As a result, he failed in the surprise test and the opportunity fell into the pockets of others. "I feel that I have paid four or five years. When I was promoted, I was suddenly stabbed." When the leader announced the result, he mentioned his mistake anonymously, "press me on the ground and rub."
The next day, he went to the leadership to apologize and promised to do a good job in the future. "I can't beat Xiaoqiang, I admire my ability to adjust."
Shen Yixing seconded to Guangzhou to see a turning point in adult life. "Like us, we don't have outstanding abilities, and it's difficult to develop in small places." I worked in the county for a few years in comfort. After get off work, I climbed mountains and found good food. I played cards and sang songs at night. He saw his 50 at the age of 25.
After coming to work in Guangzhou, "as if the frog at the bottom of the well opened the manhole cover", he found his value. His requirement for writing things in the county was "write clearly and understand"; in the province, the requirement became "simple and clear, not many words, many words". Sometimes a manuscript is changed ten times a night and eight times, and eventually the leader still has to change it.
He felt the pressure of working in a big city. "Others thought I was traveling around on the outside. They didn't see me working at one or two at night. My neck was raised and my back was sour." He has a relative, a famous school Graduated, worked as a lawyer in Beijing, and took out the computer while playing with his family, and cracked, "Isn't this pressure?"
He felt that he was not as smart as a key university student, not a leader, but a qualified engineer. But the screws need to be adhered to. "It wasn't made by ice. It disappeared when you hit it." Wages are not humble salaries, but they are also hard-earned money.
"The children born by mice don't go to the hole, they have to pay too much hard work for ordinary people to understand," said Shen Yixing. After he got married, he saved enough money to buy a house. The child was born when he hit the ground. "I found that many of my colleagues and children in the city have planned to go abroad, and the gap between people has widened exponentially." He always felt that he did not go out of the countryside, calling himself a "white-collar worker", "only running hard Will not be exposed to rain." He tried his best to make Mandarin appear standard. "Because you don't have an umbrella."
He got a villain book in his childhood, which can be read 10 times. He didn’t touch football until he graduated from elementary school. The entertainment of the rural children is to jump in the pond. “It’s fine if you don’t drown, you can live to the present.” And his children have no sense of the countryside, only know There is a "place for playing sticks (referring to firecrackers)".
On the 10th anniversary of graduation last year, Shen Yixing returned to the school to see that the lake in front of the school had dried up and there were several broken bicycles lying on the bottom of the lake. He was the father of two children, and he was content with the sound of frolic on the weekend home. He said university education is equivalent to a second birth. The big waves washed the sand and washed out gold, but more sand.
Lin Feng also carried his child back to school. They are all in their 30s, have established a family and set up a business, and they have caught up with the rising period of economic development when looking for a job. The house prices are at the foot of the mountain.
Ten years later, Mo Xiao faced a harder reality, "I earn five or six thousand yuan a month, how can I afford a house of five or six thousand yuan per square meter?"
Huang Deng said that for some students, by buying a house and doing business, they have straightened out their personal lives and achieved financial freedom, while for some students, they have not only lived without a fixed place, their income is limited, and their work is extremely stable. Objectively speaking, the key element of the difference between the two is the house.
For 15 years, the yellow light is like a record, always played by people who have just arrived on campus. In the classroom of the history of foreign literature, the theme is the fate of Julien in "Red and Black", and the discussion is endless.
Tall magnolias are planted around the classroom, the small campus is full of southern plants, and the sky is high. An ordinary classroom scene, yellow light recalled many years later, is still memorable.
In the past few years in the classroom, she said less and less of things that are reckless, "I can't find an opportunity and I am confused." She once told classic poetry to the students, who felt very funny. "They don't have cheap passion, they don't use the word poetry, they only use jokes and ridicule to describe the current feelings, those celebrity words."
But she knows that no matter how poor daily life is or how poetic the reality is, students are creating all conditions to act. Huang Deng feels that they "do not necessarily change their destiny", but they avoid the possibility of slipping into a worse situation if they do not study.
(At the request of the interviewee, Shen Yixing, Mo Xiao and Lin Feng are pseudonyms)
China Youth Daily reporter Yang Jie Source: China Youth Daily