The quiet screams of cancer patients June 4 18:18

Many people are worried about being infected with the new coronavirus. Among them, the one who feels particularly strong anxiety is the cancer patient, who is said to be at risk of getting serious if infected. A woman in one patient said she was twice as scared as the risk of cancer metastasis and recurrence was compounded by the risk of aggravation. What can we do for those who feel serious anxiety? With that in mind, I interviewed the patients.
(Society Department reporter Yasuyo Mabuchi)

"Today's Corona is really hard"

“I think cancer patients are really lonely. I wonder if there are many people who are really hard and isolated now in Corona.”

Kumiko Nishida (52), who lives in Kyoto City, said that she had breast cancer in the spring. Was diagnosed. After undergoing surgery and anti-cancer drug treatment, he is now visiting the hospital once every three months and is being examined for metastases and recurrence.

As the infection with the new coronavirus spreads, I began to feel a great deal of anxiety about going to the hospital.

In April, the news that actress Kumiko Okae, who was also being treated for breast cancer, died further exacerbated her anxiety.

Mr. Nishida talked about his current uneasiness.

Kumiko Nishida
“In the first place, we are worried about whether cancer has metastasized or whether it has recurred. In addition to that, we also have anxiety about what to do if we get corona during our visit. And my fears have doubled.''

And now, he talks about the "loneliness" I feel as a cancer patient. Nishida-san's words seemed to be the quiet screams of people who face life-threatening illness, so I decided to tell them in detail.

One day suddenly, in a cancer patient

Mr. Nishida is the head of a private elementary school in Kyoto and has a husband and three children. Cancer was found two years ago, in March. As usual, when I was watching TV with my family after taking a bath, I felt a lump in my right chest that I touched casually. When I went to a nearby mammary gland clinic, I was urged to have a detailed examination, and although I felt a little uncomfortable, I spent my time praying until the results came out.

However, a few days later, the name of the disease informed by the doctor was breast cancer. In fact, Nishida-san's mother and aunt also had breast cancer, so she had to undergo a medical examination every two years. There was no abnormality so far, and it was just before I started thinking about the next examination just in case.

At that time, the eldest son was 18, the eldest daughter was 16, and the youngest son was 8 years old. "Why I... What happens to my children if I die?" The first thing that came to my mind was the child.

Death fear

Every day after the announcement, I started searching for cancer on the Internet if I had a little time. For the first time, I learned that there are various types of breast cancer, and the treatment method and prognosis greatly change depending on the size of the cancer and the presence or absence of metastases.

Recalling the test results given at the clinic and the doctor's words, I searched the Internet for unfamiliar jargon and tried to find out what category my cancer belonged to and what kind of treatment I needed. did. However, negative information is inevitable.

“Maybe I have a poor prognosis and difficult to treat, so I might die before that distance.” All the

bad things came to my mind and I was scared of “death”.

The next month, the surgery to remove the cancer was completed successfully. The doctor told me there was no metastasis and it was "stage 1". However, if the cancer has metastasized in the future, there is a possibility that it will suddenly enter Stage 4. The fear of death and anxiety about the future remained.

Loneliness of cancer patients

Before the cancer was found, Mr. Nishida believed that he was alive 5 to 10 years in a normal way. However, I started thinking that I might not be able to see the growth of my child because I had no future.

It was especially hard in the morning. This is because when you wake up, you realize again that you are in cancer. Realizing that it was not a dream, I was deeply depressed.

Despite spending these days, I didn't talk about illness at work, and instead I worked as usual. When I got home, I could talk to my husband, but I could not inform my three children of my illness. I decided to never let the children see tears. But when I couldn't hold back, I left the house and ran a car. When I was alone, I could finally cry. I was crying out loud and driving a car, and when I realized I was running for dozens of kilometers from my home in Kyoto to Kishiwada in Osaka. I felt like I was facing the fear of death by myself.

"Let's live no matter what"

When anti-cancer drug treatment started, my hair fell out and it became difficult to hide the disease around me. I had already taken a break from work, but at home I decided to have my husband and two children tell me about my illness at home. However, I didn't know how to convey the illness of cancer to my youngest son, who was still under 10.

But one day, when I was alone with my second son, my second son spoke to me. "Hey mom. I know my mom's illness. It's "cancer". It's okay to ask. Even if my mom loses her hair, I'll do my best, so it's okay." It was a word that I thought hard while hurt my little chest. Nishida vowed to live no matter what.

Mr. Nishida was tested for the gene that he was interested in and confirmed that his cancer was hereditary. Then, in March last year, we removed the breasts, ovaries, and fallopian tubes without cancer as a preventive measure. Approximately one year after being notified of cancer. I completed two surgeries and treatment with anti-cancer drugs, and finished everything I could. I wanted to see the growth of my child for as long as possible, and I wanted to live.

Where I finally found

However, the fear of illness could not be completely eliminated. When I had some pain in my body, I was afraid that the cancer had spread. Also, it was hard for a woman to see her lost breast. I was holding such thoughts by myself without revealing them to others. I wanted to avoid worrying or worrying about it.

The turning point was finding a "patients association" on the Internet. When I took the courage to come to the patient council held at the university hospital, women who had the same illness as me gathered there. Mr. Nishida immediately got together and talked about various things. I thought that I might not be able to see my child's growth. Feeling despair when you wake up in the morning. I was able to talk without hesitation even if it was a heavy topic. By empathizing with the thoughts of other people, crying and laughing together, Mr. Nishida felt like he had finally found his place.

At the same time, I was able to understand the meaning of "loneliness" I had felt so far. Ever since my illness was discovered, my family has had children who behave brightly in an effort to keep their mother from worrying, and a husband who has been gently supporting me nearby. I don't know how much the presence of the family encouraged Nishida-san, who is fighting illness. But at the patient council, I realized that there was something that could only be filled by those who face death. I was released from "loneliness" by feeling that "I'm not the only one. There were other people who were thinking about the same thing."

Mr. Nishida made an appearance at the monthly patient council and was gradually trying to regain his peaceful days while gradually comprehending his anxiety.

Get lonely again in the corona

However, with the spread of the new coronavirus this spring, the fear of death was approaching again. It is said that he is still living in the fear of "I do not know tomorrow" because the risk of getting serious after an infection is not lost. Every day, while working at an elementary school, I take great care not to get infected.

The patient council, which was a great support for my heart when I was anxious, was affected by the new coronavirus and could not be held at the end of February. There was no choice but to prevent infection. I use SNS to communicate with my colleagues and encourage each other, but being unable to speak while looking at my face is a great stress. Mr. Nishida is pondering about other cancer patients as patient groups and exchange events between cancer patients are cancelled in various places.

Kumiko Nishida
“It's the hardest thing I can't meet with my friends. Now, people who have just discovered an illness, people whose surgery has been postponed, and frequent hospital visits with anti-cancer agents and radiation treatments. I think some of them are much more anxious and isolated than I am.''

Just a little empathy

While listening to Mr. Nishida, I imagined that the water that had filled up to the edge of the cup was barely spilling due to surface tension. Nishida endured his anxiety and was fighting loneliness. It may be impossible for those who have not experienced illness to get rid of their serious anxiety and loneliness. But I was wondering if I could do something, so I asked Mr. Nishida if anyone other than a cancer patient helped me. Nishida replied:

Kumiko Nishida
: There was a man who painted my nails when my anti-cancer drug battered my nails. At that time, having someone think of me was very supportive. Even if it's not the words you want, it's helpful to have a little empathy for "understanding.""

"Refraining from consultation" occurring among cancer patients

As a result of such anxiety of cancer patients, there are problems that are currently occurring in the medical field. It is a "reservation" for cancer patients.

Ototoshi Sakura, who was diagnosed with ovarian cancer and lung adenocarcinoma in July (43), consulted with a doctor in late April and postponed the monthly examination.

When she was in her twenties, she lost her ex-husband with blood cancer, and felt that death was a familiar part of her life. It is said to draw the image of "infection = death".

The decision to postpone the visit was due to the anticancer drug treatment and the status of lung adenocarcinoma under observation.

In March, prostate cancer was found in his father who lived with him, and Sakura felt nervous that if he got infected, he would endanger his father, who had refrained from surgery, and never be infected. Living in However, by not going to the hospital, I was also fighting the fear that detection might be delayed if there was cancer metastasis or disease progression.

Sakura is not the only cancer patient who has such anxiety. In a questionnaire survey conducted in April this year by the organization "Peering", which operates an exchange site for female cancer patients such as breast cancer and ovarian cancer, more than 1100 responded, and 1 in 4 people "new corona The spread of the virus is affecting treatment and testing."

In addition, the highest number of 57 respondents answered, "Because of fear of infection, we postponed our hospital visit schedule."

In the medical field, doctors and hospitals continue to make regular phone calls during periods when cancer patients cannot visit the hospital, and efforts to address patient anxiety have begun.

At the National Cancer Center Hospital, doctors have started telephone consultations in April, where doctors listen to their symptoms and prescribe medications to patients who have been revisited and their symptoms have subsided.

Dr. Satoshi Iwata, Director of Infectious Diseases Department, said, “Because there is a risk that delaying medical treatment may delay the treatment of cancer. Please do not worry about one patient first. Please consult first. Depending on the type and stage of cancer, For some patients, it is possible to postpone the consultation, while for others, it is better to start the treatment sooner. As a doctor may not be able to understand without asking, we would like you to feel free to consult us."

What we can do

As the effects of the new coronavirus continue, everyone may be in anxiety and unable to afford to care for others. However, there may be people around you who are suffering from fear and loneliness in a more serious condition like the two people I interviewed this time. Cancer is a familiar disease that is said to affect one in two people in their lifetime. I wanted to use my imagination a little to get closer to the feelings of those who are in fear and loneliness.

Social Department Reporter
Yasuyo Mabuchi