- You think it's a seemingly harmless melody, until you hear your teenage daughter sing behind the door of her room the litany "I like them older ..."
- When he gets to the part of "I like them bigger, that they don't fit in my mouth, the kisses he wants to give me and make me crazy", then, whoever goes crazy or crazy is you.
- Paradoxically, the triumph of these letters that abuse sexist content where men value women for their physical attractiveness and they extol their erotic-seductive ability coincide with the explosion of #metoo
You may have been surprised by humming the "Despacito", the catchy song by Luis Fonsi, or wiggling your hips to the sound of Daddy Yankee's famous "Gasoline". They are two examples of the phenomenon in which reggaeton has become, that crushing music that infects the second the desire to shake the skeleton. A playful rhythm, for those moments of little demanding ear and desire to dance that we all (or almost all) ever have.
A seemingly harmless melody , until you hear your teenage daughter sing behind the door of her room the litany "I like older , those who call gentlemen, those who open the door, and send you flowers." When he gets to the part of " I like them bigger , that they don't fit in my mouth, the kisses he wants to give me and make me crazy", then, whoever goes crazy or crazy is you.
They are letters that abuse sexist content where men value women for their physical attractiveness and they extol their erotic-seductive ability. But this is not the #metoo generation ? What a paradox!
RHYTHM AND NARCISISM
Interestingly, reggaeton is born as an expression of urban culture that grew in poverty environments. It is a very simple music based on a rhythm called Dembow (name of the first song) that combines the instruments of the bass drum and the box to create a very catchy and simple melody.
Then it has been merging with other rhythms such as pop that sweetens it a bit with romantic themes to get closer to a wider audience that now bombards with the same danceable and machacon rhythm, but with sexually explicit lyrics when not denigrating .
Predictable and crushing rhythms can be very attractive to the brain. Edward Largue of the University of Connecticut exposed some subjects to an original piece of Chopin and another in which certain variations had been removed and sounded mechanical. This latest version based on the fixed rhythm "hypnotized" the brains of people without musical culture. This is why a medium subject is more likely to engage more with reggaeton than with jazz.
A rhythm that has the peculiarity that the more we expose ourselves to it the more we will like it. Teenagers can identify with this dance music, with repetitive rhymes and provocative lyrics regarding prevailing morals (which can be an act of rebellion in itself).
The insinuating dance can serve as an approach to sexuality: they dance and lose the fear of sex in which they are starting.
WHAT DO TEENS THINK?
It seems that young people are not very aware of the lyrics themselves. However, when you ask them individually you discover, as always with pleasure, that adolescents do think, they have their criteria, they know very well what those letters say and measure the consequences , but this ability is as if it were turned off when they are put on A group situation.
Alba, 16, explains it clearly: "Although the lyrics are very macho, people dance it for the rhythm, which is very lively or because as now they put it in every party and it is fashionable because when I go out it’s what everyone puts on, it’s the most accessible thing to people, "and he continues," I listen to rap, but when I’m on the street with my friends they never, or almost never, put it on. I guess rap is more made for listen to the lyrics and reggaeton just to dance it because it doesn't transmit anything. "
18-year-old ñaki, on the other hand, is somewhat angry with her friends: "They are feminists like me and they demonstrate against machismo, but then they are the first to dance that music . They like the rhythm and can't say no." .
Beyond the hypnotic effect of his machacón rhythm , reggaeton helps to socialize, makes some teenagers feel connected and mutually recognized, even if they know that the content is not appropriate. The group of friends is very important at this stage. In addition, the tendency to express with the body and with behavior what is not yet translated into thought and reflexivity is typical of this period.
As parents we should not worry, but we should take care and take advantage of this musical opportunity to exchange opinions and listen to our children without sermons, so that they really tell us what they think, what their tastes are, what interests them.
It will not be reggaeton that leads them to risky behaviors, but that they cannot trust us (because we always judge them) or trust them (because they live overprotected). Living with teenagers always means the need to reconcile paradoxical aspects. Our task is not to criticize their world but to help them develop a greater sense of responsibility in the real, virtual and musical world! I take this opportunity to conclude with Iñaki's call: "The rhythm is fine, but please change the lyrics!" .
Tips for worried parents
Drop down
The relationship of adults facing these behaviors ranges from punishing or forgiving, exaggerating or doing as if nothing. Better a response, although minimal, that behaves that the adolescent is involved, we can keep communication open as a path of growth (we must take advantage of everything to help them grow). The true educational process is to respond to your evolutionary needs, opening possible futures. Here are some ideas:
1. Show interest and be informed by the tastes of our children . Not only at the musical level. Being able to know the cause will make intergenerational communication more feasible while making our child perceive our involvement.
2. Invite our children to a shared listening of the lyrics of the songs. This will encourage reflection on the content and aspects related to the values of respect and coexistence can be addressed.
3. Ask what they like about this musical style . In this aspect it is about being able to listen without judging. It is not mandatory to agree with what they say, of course.
4. Avoid authoritarian positions. The biggest mistake is to connote something as forbidden since its natural tendency to rebellion will make it even more interesting. Undoubtedly, reggaeton has benefited from all the publicity associated with its reputation as a macho and violent. Hence articles like this are written.
5. Try to share with them other musical styles of our liking. They may not like them, but seeing that their parents can enjoy other types of music will open at least one field of possibilities that they may want to explore later.
ISABEL SERRANO-ROSA is director and psychologist of EnPositivoSí.
According to the criteria of The Trust Project
Know more- Reggaeton
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