How do you ask for a salary increase without making your boss angry?

Stu Smith, owner of a branding company with 10 employees, still remembers how difficult it was to discuss a pay raise with one of his employees when he called him into his office to inquire about the impact of his own projects on his performance at work, only to receive a bold answer from that employee, "Just double my salary, And I'm going to stop doing all this side work."

In a report published in the New York Times (NYtimes), Paulette Berhach offers advice from psychologists and managers on how to approach this difficult question.

In order to get a raise, most employees do the opposite of what Smith's employee did, often delaying asking for a raise at the risk of losing those earnings just to avoid the embarrassing question.

In this regard, the author asked people who were recipients of such requests, and others who studied organizational dynamics and psychology in the workplace to give their best advice on how to prepare for and handle the issue of asking for a raise.

The author mentioned that employees feel weak or embarrassed about asking for a higher salary, but according to Daniel Pink - bestselling author of work and behavior books including his latest book, "The Power of Regret" - the biggest mistake they make is to postpone this Conversation for fear of possible rejection.

He says that they "miss themselves the opportunity to accept their request, and exaggerate the fear of the negative consequences of this question."

If your boss responds to you with a fit of anger, this may mean that it is time to look for a new job (Getty Images)

To gain the confidence to ask this question, Pink suggests getting a friend to practice by pretending to make it difficult for you to have a conversation with responses like "I'll think about it" and "No."

It's practice asking these kinds of questions, and the "worst that can happen" is for things to stay the same.

But if your boss responds to you with a tantrum, this may mean that it is time to look for a new job.

The power of persuasion

Pink added that the second biggest mistake employees make lies in the justifications they provide when they demand a salary increase, as they - as he put it - do not think enough about the point of view of their boss or the point of view of the decision-maker.

In this case, Pink recommends focusing on the power of persuasion and how to influence the mind and thinking of the decision-maker or official.

To do this, Alexandria Brown, an HR consultant and founder of The HR Hacker who has dealt with hundreds of employees over her career, advises presenting yourself not as your current qualities but as the employee you aspire to be.

Before talking about your performance review, Brown recommends giving your boss a signal that you want to talk about your career.

When you come to the meeting, talk not only about your contributions but also about your career plans for the coming year.

“For me, it shows how aware and emotionally intelligent an employee is,” Brown explains, noting that she's heard managers say they value employees who know what they can keep working on.

"It actually reduces the impact of asking for more money a bit," she adds.

Brown suggests that the employee hold the meeting face to face to make the most of nonverbal communication, as the employee should be confident and positive, and delve into talking about his work and not his personal life.

And if there is reason for you to hesitate about taking this step, the author advises applying the principles set forth in the book “Before persuasion” by behavioral psychologist Robert Cialdini, who studies “what drives people to say yes to requests.” yes to requests).

This book encourages you to visualize your question as a seed you want to plant, which will have better chances of growing if you till the ground first.

But he says that employees wait until asking for a raise to justify their request, by which time it is often too late, so he advises instead to prepare arguments in advance and carefully consider what your boss thinks of your performance and your value.

During your work, make sure that you are the least complaining employee or the one who always gets to work early (Shutterstock)

Giving your business great value

To generate a more positive view of your business and yourself as a resource to the company, Cialdini suggests making sure to place value on your work.

If your boss asks you to complete a task and then thanks you, don't just say, "You're welcome," say something better like, "I was glad to do that" or "This is what we should do here."

And before the meeting to ask for a raise, try to appear as a unique and rare person, because - according to Cialdini - "people are more attracted to unique, rare or unfamiliar opportunities, so if you represent an opportunity for them, they will work to preserve you."

To take advantage of the scarcity factor, the author recommends thinking about how you can highlight yourself at work by making sure you are the least complaining employee or the person who always gets to work early.

And when you have a conversation about finances, Cialdini encourages employees to give their boss compliments, such as, "I consider you a fair person who takes good care of your employees, and I am very happy about that because I want to talk to you about my situation." This tact may motivate the manager because people tend to To conform to their image in society.

According to Pink, the employee should focus on what is good for the boss and what is fair, explaining that the way people evaluate equity in compensation includes two aspects: internal equity, which evaluates salary compared to compensation for the same work within the organization, and external equity, which takes into account the labor market. general.

To determine what's fair to you, gather information about what people with your experience earn in your area and in jobs like yours, and information about what people at your level are paid within your company, and you can compare.