• Relationships How to get an orgasm by stimulating only the nipples

It may not be possible to say today on

paper

that men and women are different, but it can be said that their orgasms have nothing to do with it, at least because science has shown it to be so.

That they can reach climax in a few minutes depending on the stimulation they are enjoying, for example, although it usually takes longer than them to achieve it.

Or that

they can have a

petite mort

of 20 seconds

-although the usual ranges between six and 10- and that

they have it between three and six.

But there is in these times

a kind of race to the ultimate orgasm in which both they and they would be competing

.

In a hypersexualized scenario, with sexual relationships and practices (toys, polyamory, whatever) put on the table and a sexual conversation that has gone from being ostracized to the

mainstream

, now, after all, it is not that the pleasure of our own, others and even community but we are obsessed with

orgasming

in the most overwhelming way possible.

Many decades have passed, almost seven, since sexology expressly addresses female pleasure, but professionals still have to say things like the following: "

Having more orgasms is not being happier or more modern, it doesn't even have to be more satisfying

." .

There is a search for orgasm as if it were a fashion product that attributes a higher level to those who have them, generating unnecessary discomfort and invalidating other pleasurable experiences.

The wonder of achieving, for example, true intimacy between two human beings.

Feeling so, so comfortable as to spend the day

naked

with the other person now that the heat is so tight.

Plug in the fan and make the world disappear even though, also because of the heat, we choose not to touch each other.

In return, today there are even sex coaches, or sexual

coaches

who, on social networks, explain very plastically how a woman could ejaculate (have a

squirt

), as if this were the most common thing in the world, when in fact it is not. .

Tomorrow is the

International Female Orgasm Day

, a date that has been commemorated since 2006, and

we continue to be obsessed with results and much less with processes.

.

Another date that helps to contextualize the current panorama: the clitoris as we know it was not discovered until the 16th century, although, in reality, until the 90s of the 20th century, when a 3D image of it was obtained, We were not really clear about what that female protuberance consisted of, which, according to sexology, exists solely and exclusively to give pleasure.

The great evolution of the female orgasm, or of our knowledge of it, is framed between the 60s of the last century and the present, since we have already been banishing myths and legends such as that all orgasms are the same and that the emotional and the sexual walk paths divergent.

Common places that we have replaced with new ones, such as that all women are or can be multi-orgasmic

or that anyone with a vulva, as they say now, can even ejaculate at any given time.

Meanwhile, real problems, like the fact that there are women who stop dead when they realize they are reaching orgasm, go more unnoticed.

Such a reaction, which sexologists attribute to the difficulty that some women have in allowing themselves pleasure or fear of letting themselves go, does not easily become headlines, not at least like those generated by a Satisfyer.

The tricky part of it is that

letting go, abandoning yourself, etc., has a lot to do with the quality of the female orgasm

.

Giving permission to pleasure -this is also affirmed by sexology- is necessary to reach orgasm, since it does not respond to a mechanical question or to protocols that consist of jack, horse and king.

In addition, "many women have pleasure in a different way when they are alone than when they are with a partner," says sexologist

Diana Fernández Saro

.

"Alone they feel free to do and seek pleasure without fuss or taboos, without haste, from experience and self-knowledge, so that pleasure is usually assured."

A survey carried out by the erotic products firm Diversual in Spain to celebrate the International Day of the Female Orgasm in 2022 says precisely this, that

«87.4% of Spanish women say that on most occasions they reach orgasm with masturbation »

.

So only 14%

orgasm

during sexual practices with another person, according to this study carried out with almost 5,000 Spanish citizens between the ages of 18 and 60.

It is true that the percentage of women who say that their orgasms come from masturbation is not among the younger generations, but rather increases with age.

It is positive, of course, but it also makes you think.

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