Say goodbye to anger and impulsiveness. Here are expert tips for managing your emotions in a less stressful way

Chronic stress builds up to become a lifestyle for some women, putting pressure on women's health. It may cause depression, damage the heart and blood pressure, cause weight gain and stress-related headaches, and it is more common in women than in men, according to the "Cleveland Clinic" (clevelandclinic).

Nervous tension in females is faster and stronger, as “women are almost twice as likely to suffer from stress-related psychological disorders as men,” says Debra A.

Banjasser is an assistant professor and researcher in neurology and endocrinology at Temple University, USA.

Women are often the most emotional in discussions or in the face of provocations, "to the point that she tears for no reason, and says angry words that she quickly regrets, which brings all kinds of tension and drama into her life," according to Ellen Scott in her article on the "Metro" website. (Metro).

Therefore, experts do not advise women to ignore their feelings and close in on themselves, but to learn how to deal with these feelings in a healthy and less dramatic way, by learning to respond rather than react, and do things that allow calm and undo stress.

Not to suppress feelings

It's okay to be emotional. Our feelings are there "to keep us safe, and as a powerful warning to respond, especially under threat," says Dr. Audrey Tang, psychologist and author of Leaders' Guide to Resilience, noting that "repressing negative emotions can cause problems." In mental health, it may lead to an inability to form a positive connection with people, places, or things.”

When someone is confused, they can feel that their emotions are uncontrollable and that they are about to collapse, which leads to reactions that they may regret, whether they are vindictive by other people, or self-destructive.

The solution here is not to ignore your feelings. It is not healthy to not have feelings at all;

But it's about emotional intelligence, the ability to control reactions, to be able to respond rather than react emotionally.

Learning emotional intelligence

Gaining emotional intelligence, and recognizing and understanding our feelings begins with identifying the cause of the crisis that led to the emotional rush, as well as the thoughts or beliefs and behaviors that stand behind it, and our willingness to abandon the useless ones, and search for alternatives that can be applied.

Then engage in activities that promote positive emotions and feel fulfillment, "such as going for a walk when you're feeling down, rather than sitting and drowning in anger, or replacing an immediate reaction with a correct response," Tang recommends.

Gaining emotional intelligence and recognizing and understanding our feelings begins with identifying the cause of the crisis (Getty Images)

Response is better than immediate reaction

The "response" to provocations may appear to be automatic;

But when we are on the verge of intense anger and shock, the reaction can become harmful;

The best is to breathe and "respond".

Psychotherapist Jo Kirsted tells us that "a reaction is usually faster as an immediate impulsive action", while "a response is after we have spent time thinking about what we want to do next."

So, the response is the most empowering “because it is more controlling, and it means that we can face difficult situations and control them rather than own them.”

Also, responding makes us feel more “able to decide how to deal with a challenge, rather than letting the situation and the circumstances and the emotions that provoke it overwhelm us.”

“Simply put, when it comes to provocative discussions, the immediate reaction is instinctive and impulsive, but the response ensures a more logical and deliberate response," Tang says.

Delaying pressing an email send button, for example, is a response that “gives us time, not only to compose a clear response, but to take in what has already been said, and provide a sense of self-pity after a hasty response may not be without errors.”

Joe returns and warns that strong emotions can be so stressful that we react in a way that may not be the best;

We often make bad choices that we later regret, after turning a situation from bad to worse, and find ourselves in a “behavioral spiral that leaves us feeling hurt, misunderstood, and isolated, and its repetition or continuation erodes our mental health.”

When it comes to provocative discussions, the immediate reaction is instinctive and impulsive (Getty Images)

Take a pose to reduce the severity of the situation

Because reactions happen quickly, it is best to give ourselves even a minute to think before responding, and do whatever we can to calm down and slow things down.

So Jo recommends “taking advantage of even the simplest things to take a pause to reduce the severity of the situation,” such as trying to deliberately change your body position by moving your shoulders or tightening your neck, changing your gaze, taking a sip of water, remembering a good memory, going to the bathroom, or “Anything that gives you control and space to think about what happens to you, and how you might move forward.”

It's okay, then, "to apologize for a moment, and tell those who upset us that we need to take a break and spend some time away, so that we do not react in a way that we will regret."

Have a long breath

If you find that your emotional reactions are completely out of control and have a devastating effect on your life;

It's best to talk to a professional "to find out the roots of why you are like this, to gain a better understanding of yourself, and to get the right support to change how you respond."

According to Audrey's recommendation, which believes that "there is no solution to this type of confrontation except to get out of the scope of the current crisis", to be patient, which allows calm, to take a step back, and to stay away for a short period of any pressure.

This is what Joe supports by emphasizing the need to "find practical ways to calm ourselves down in times of stress, so that we can defuse our crisis, feel less fatigued, and gain enough space to be less emotional, more responsive, and make better choices." They include “breathing practice, meditation and exercise, learning to ask for help, and writing down and sharing our experiences.”