Children get angry like all humans.

Anger is a natural reaction to keep us safe, and when we feel threatened or someone is attacking us or at our borders, we get angry.

This also applies to children.

Because children have no context for their reactions, a small disappointment can feel like the end of the world.

Worse, because they do not have a fully developed prefrontal cortex to help them self-regulate, children are more likely to attack others when they are angry.

According to Ahaparenting, sometimes it makes sense to attack others when we are angry, but only when there is an actual threat, which is rare.

And most of the time when a child gets angry, he wants to attack his little brother who broke the game, or his father who unfairly punished him from his point of view, or his teacher who embarrassed him, or the bully on the playground who frightened him.

As children's brains develop, they gain the ability to manage their anger constructively, only if they live in a home where anger is handled in a healthy way.

It may seem wrong to expect our children to deal with anger constructively, when we adults don't do so often.

Here are some tips for constructively dealing with anger for children or even adults.

With your help, your child will learn to calm himself when he is angry so that he can express his needs (pixels)

  • aggressiveness control

When parents accept and empathize with a child's feelings, they learn that emotions are not dangerous and that we can feel and express them, without having to act on them.

When we accept our child's anger and remain calm, he or she charts neural pathways and learns emotional skills to calm himself and express how he feels without harming people or property.

  • admit anger

If you can stop yourself from getting emotional and acknowledging why your child is upset, his anger will begin to subside.

This will help him feel safe enough to feel the most vulnerable emotions that lead to anger.

Like his grief over the broken game or his fear when his classmate threatened him.

When these weak feelings begin to fade, there is no need for anger.

And if we don't help children feel safe they will continue to lose their temper, because they have no other way to deal with the turmoil within them.

  • Constructive problem solving

Your goal should be for your child to use anger as an incentive to change things as necessary so that the situation does not recur.

Like moving his toys out of the little brother's reach, or getting parental help to deal with the bully.

This may also include acknowledging his contribution to the problem.

With your help, your child will learn to calm himself when he is angry so that he can express his needs and desires without attacking the other person, either physically or verbally.

He will learn to see the other side of the problem and find solutions to it, rather than just assuming he is right and the other person wrong.

If you are in the habit of yelling at your children, know that you are doing behavior that your child will surely imitate (Getty Images)

How can parents help children learn to manage their anger?

  • Start with yourself

According to Awarenessact, if you are in the habit of yelling at your children, know that you are doing a behavior that your child will certainly copy.

It can be hard to stop yourself from yelling at him, but if you succumb to this temptation, don't expect your child to learn to control himself.

  • De-escalation

Your job when your child is angry is to restore calm, because children can only learn and understand how to behave better when they are calm.

Your calm presence, even when the child is angry, helps him or her feel safe.

This helps him develop neural pathways in the brain that stop the fight response and allow the frontal cortex of the brain to take over.

  • All feelings are allowed

When people get angry, they don't rest until someone listens to them.

So when your child expresses his anger, the best thing you can do is listen and acknowledge how sad he is and why.

At that point, don't tell your child to calm down or act appropriately.

It's best to open the door to him, saying, "Are you so angry? Can you tell me what happened without yelling at me?"

Later, once your child has calmed down, you can talk to him about the appropriate tone or language.

Usually at this point, since your child now feels that his voice is being heard, he will apologize automatically.

Remember, you don't encourage bad behavior.

You accept all feelings, but not all behaviors.

  • Give the child ways to deal with his anger now

Children need skills to manage their anger while it is happening.

When your child is calm, write a list of constructive ways to deal with angry feelings. Have him put this list on the fridge.

He can stop anger, for example, by taking a deep breath or pressing a foam ball with his hand.

Or hear some music and do some furious dancing.

Allowing Emotions Doesn't Mean We Allow Destructive Actions (Pixels)

  • Putting limits on aggression

Allowing feelings does not mean that we allow destructive actions.

Children should not be allowed to hit others, if they do you should set boundaries and help them contain their anger.

"You can be as angry as you want but never hit anyone."

  • He won't calm down by himself

Often your goal when your child is angry or upset is to restore his sense of safety, which requires your presence next to him.

Remember that children need your love in all situations and at all times.

Not having you will give your child the message that he is alone with these big and scary feelings.

Stay with your child and help him get over his feelings.

You will be amazed at the way your child begins to show more self-control when you adopt this practice.