What kind of emotional education do young people need? (China Youth Watch⑨)
Not long ago, Wuhan University held a lecture on emotional education, and the atmosphere was lively.
The event sparked heated discussion on the Internet.
Many people believe that this reflects the current young people's expectations for emotional education.
The "Medium and Long-term Youth Development Plan (2016-2025)" issued by the Central Committee of the Communist Party of China and the State Council in 2017 proposes to strengthen the education and guidance of young people's views on marriage and family.
In recent years, some domestic colleges and universities have successively opened courses such as "Life Happiness Course" and "Intimate Relationship" to help students deal with emotional problems such as family relationships, interpersonal relationships, and gender relationships.
For young people who have entered the society, various local Communist Youth League organizations, corporate trade unions, social work organizations, matchmaking platforms, and psychological counseling organizations have participated in one after another, advocating youths to develop a correct view of marriage and love.
Experts said that we should pay more attention to and value the emotional education of young people, guide them to establish civilized, healthy, and rational views and values of marriage and love, and help young people to take a good path in life.
Advocate the establishment of a civilized, healthy and rational concept of love
Many people have recently seen these photos on the Internet: Wuhan University students lined up to listen to a lecture on the psychology of love.
The lecture hall was full of people sitting on the steps and aisles. Even outside the classroom, there were many classmates who stood on tiptoes and lay on their toes and listened carefully at the window.
This lecture was lectured by Yu Feng, a professor in the Department of Psychology of the School of Philosophy of Wuhan University. The content mainly focused on the basic theories of love in positive psychology, including Sternberg’s trinity of love, attachment theory, the classification of love, and how to Identify bad relationships.
In the lecture, Yu Feng explained the "appropriately perfect image with some flaws" with "Baibi's slightly flawed art", and used "the four knights of the doomsday" as a metaphor for the four types of criticism, contempt, defense, and cold war in marriage relationships. A very destructive model of negative coexistence. The "love map" is used to explain the formation of an intimate relationship between the opposite sex. Both parties need to know each other enough... Fresh terms, humorous language style, supplemented by scientifically evidenced psychology Knowledge, this ingenious mix and match ignites students' enthusiasm for learning.
"I hope to help college students who have just grown up to establish a civilized, healthy and rational outlook on love and values." Yu Feng explained the original intention of the lecture in this way.
In his daily work, he found that many students' psychological problems are mostly related to interpersonal communication, and love is an important part of it. Establishing a correct concept of love is conducive to promoting the development of students' mental health.
"The enthusiasm of the students reflects the desire for knowledge of emotional relationships such as family relationships, interpersonal relationships, and heterosexual relationships."
Doctoral student Xiao Wei was one of the students who listened to the lecture on the same day.
She believes: "This lecture conveyed a message that not everyone knows how to love others correctly and express their feelings rationally; love is an ability that can be learned and improved."
While the lecture is widely welcomed by students, some people also have questions: "The university teaches students to fall in love?" "Does love still need to be taught?" said a Xiaoxuan who just enrolled this year: "The focus of the lecture is not to teach students. Love skills, but to teach us how to correctly understand the matter of love, how to look at the things and people around us from the perspective of positive psychology, how to love ourselves, to love others better, and to love the whole world."
"College students' pursuit of emotional education courses reflects their urgent needs for the improvement of love knowledge, abilities and literacy; the development of marriage and love education and emotional education in colleges and universities will help promote college students to improve their values such as marriage and love ethics in the new stage of life. , To better manage the relationship between oneself and others, and to shape a healthy personality." said Deng Xiquan, a researcher at the Youth Development Institute of the China Youth Research Center.
Strengthen the sense of integrity, respect and responsibility for emotional life
The rapid advancement of modernization and urbanization has promoted the subjectivity and independence of young individuals. The vigorous development of the Internet has strengthened young people's right to speak in social life, and has also prompted changes in their attitudes towards love.
Some feel that "being in love is troublesome".
After graduating from university, the "post-95" Beijing youth Chen Cheng entered a certain company through enrollment.
However, his marriage and love "progress bar" has been stagnant, making his parents very anxious.
"Usually I am tired after get off work. I enrolled in a fitness class on weekends. I have time to make appointments with friends and play games. There is no time to fall in love." In Chen Cheng's view, he had a very fulfilling life when he was just working and fell in love. With an attitude of recklessness, sometimes even feel that "love relationships are troublesome and difficult to deal with."
In a survey conducted by the Central Committee of the Communist Youth League, 74.8% of young people think that "singleness is good, but love is troublesome".
Experts say that some young people are reluctant to fall in love or get married if they find that love and marriage cannot improve their quality of life or affect the realization of personal self-worth.
Some have some concerns about falling in love.
Wang Ying, who works for an Internet company in Shanghai, is 25 years old. She is very eager to talk about a romantic relationship, but she is a little scared: "I often see in the news that some people are under the guise of dating for mental control, worrying that they will meet too. To this kind of person."
A person in charge of a marriage agency said that young people in the Internet age are likely to receive fragmented negative information about marriage and love, and in some places there are bad habits in marriage and love, wedding rooms, and wedding gifts. It is easy for young people to form stereotypes about marriage and love. Misconceptions, "fear of love" and "fear of marriage" appear.
Duan Xinxing, a professor at the School of Public Administration of China University of Mining and Technology, has conducted lectures and surveys on the mental health of college students in hundreds of universities across the country, and opened an online course on "Love Psychology".
She found that the greatest impact on the mental health of college students is the emotional relationship. The problems they encounter in love are mostly related to communication, such as not knowing how to confess, not knowing how to deal with conflicts, conflicts, disagreements, and long-distance relationship problems that arise during the relationship. .
"Emotional education should be used to strengthen youth's sense of integrity, respect and responsibility for emotional life." In Yu Feng's view, these consciousnesses will eventually form the values of young people in the face of love and marriage.
Such values are first of all rational.
According to psychological theory, love is a process from passion to intimacy, from intimacy to commitment.
Falling in love means that the intimate relationship between two people moves forward, requiring mutual understanding, mutual running-in, and sharing the resulting moral responsibilities.
Such values should also be civilized, and oppose the manipulation of each other's self-esteem and feelings, the creation of strong inequality, and the antagonism between men and women.
Provide effective guarantee for youth emotional education
"The content of the love class is different from what I imagined." Lv Wei, a junior at a college in Tianjin, took the "Love Psychology" course taught by Professor Duan Xinxing last semester.
She thought that the teacher would teach love skills, but in fact, this course mainly teaches young people how to get along with each other correctly and how to adjust their mentality.
According to reports, the content of the course includes theoretical knowledge of love psychology, the psychological laws of stabilizing love, love frustration psychology and adjustment, etc.
The teaching format is mainly based on MOOC, and some offline activities and live broadcast activities will be held to answer questions for young people inside and outside the school.
The reporter saw on a MOOC platform that the total number of elective courses for the course was nearly 20,000.
Duan Xinxing said that the main purpose of the course is to help young people establish a correct outlook on love and values, understand the differences between the sexes, and understand the nature of love at the same time.
"The essence of love is intimacy, which belongs to the category of social relations, but it is not limited to the relationship between two people. Emotional triggering is a complex issue, which permeates our values, background, current state and many other factors."
The "Mid- and Long-term Youth Development Plan (2016-2025)" proposes to strengthen the education and guidance of the young people's view of marriage and family view, and incorporate marriage and love education into the education system of colleges and universities.
In recent years, some domestic colleges and universities have successively opened emotional education courses such as "Life Happiness Course", "Intimate Relationship", "Love and Life Happiness", and set up mental health education and counseling centers.
Some Communist Youth League organizations, corporate trade unions, matchmaking platforms, and psychological counseling organizations have actively strengthened the construction of a social psychological service system by holding love lectures, friendship exchanges and networking activities for young people.
How to make young people feel the beauty of love and marriage while fully respecting the young generation's love attitude and choices?
This requires schools, families, and society to work together to strengthen emotional education.
Yu Feng suggested that more colleges and universities offer courses and lectures related to youth marriage and love education.
He believes that as a part of positive psychology, these courses and lectures are beneficial to help students build an optimistic and peaceful psychological foundation when facing emotions, and grow in thought.
Deng Xiquan also believes that colleges and universities, teachers and related researchers should conduct in-depth research on how young people should establish a correct outlook on love under the guidance of socialist core values, and actively incorporate emotional education into college ideological and political education courses.
The family is the harbor of emotions.
Xiao Wei said that the parents' and relatives' views on marriage and love in the native family will directly affect the children's psychological state when looking for objects in the future.
She believes that parents should strengthen their children's emotional education, so that children learn to express, learn to care, and cultivate a sense of family responsibility.
Experts suggest that relevant departments should consider marriage, childbirth, parenting, and education as a whole, and at the same time vigorously advocate civilized and simple "new marriage customs" in the whole society, so that love and marriage can get rid of the utilitarian color and bad customs, and form a positive and healthy public opinion orientation. And social environment, provide effective guarantee for youth emotional education.
Peng Xunwen