Hajj Abbas Kuyer (69 years) did not expect that a day would come when he would find himself with the elderly in a government house, and a small room was devoted to him in silence, away from the noise of his grandchildren whom he used to hear, and while he refreshes his memory with these sounds, his eyes constantly watch the door of his room, perhaps a warm visitor overlooks On him, and he carries with him some of the scent of the family in which he lived as a shepherd and responsible.
After his wife died, he continued to suffer from loneliness, but his presence among his children and grandchildren eased him those days that he spent alone without being sociable, for everyone is preoccupied with his private life, but the situation did not last long, until the painful memory journey began while he listened to the humiliating words uttered by his son’s wife whenever she came forward. He had food, as she used to complain and throw him offensive words without mercy, and the matter got worse when he delayed his feeding time, thus delaying his medication date, until his health deteriorated, and despite that suffering, he did not suspect his poor condition in order to protect his son's family from problems, he says.
His suffering inside his "home" ended at the hands of his son’s wife when she stood in front of him and said to him, “I am not your servant, until I bear your burden. You are a heavy guest. When will you leave to rest?”
In addition to insulting words, as soon as Al-Hajj mentioned him, a choking lump woke up in his chest, saying, "In those moments I thought I was dreaming, then my tears exploded like an orphan whose parents died before his eyes, until my soul filled with weakness, and I did not utter a single letter, as if she had thrown me a stone."
All of this, despite his bitterness, was easy for Hajj Abbas, in relation to the reaction of his children, who were not "responsible and humane," as he describes it;
His children decided to send him against his will to the home for the elderly, or as people call it "the home for the elderly."
After these painful details, Al-Hajj clapped his hands together, and repeated the famous proverb:
In a sign from him that the end of his efforts and raising his children did not bear fruit in returning the favor when he needed them.
Some elderly people in Iraq missed returning the favor from their children when they needed to (Al-Jazeera)
Governmental and international indicators
Iraq recently witnessed, and through what is circulated on social media, sad stories of children abandoning their fathers and mothers, so that the homes of the elderly cannot accommodate them, including healthy people, some of whom have pensions, but they were surprised that they did not accept them among their children. Or abuse them, or seize their money, so some of them took refuge in the street in search of a safe haven to shelter them, while others preferred to go to the home for the elderly to join those whose children forced them to live in those homes.
And the Iraqi Ministry of Interior announced the registration of (617) cases of assault by children against fathers during the first half of the current year 2020, and civil society organizations confirmed that the elderly are the most vulnerable to violence within the family, and expected high rates of violence towards them during the period of the spread of the Corona virus.
Although "elder abuse" is a subject that is considered to be socially inviolable, it has not taken its place within the national action plans.
In accordance with Law No. 4 of 1985, nursing homes are considered a safe space for rest, according to conditions specified by the law, and these homes can only violate the law on personal liability.
The director of the elderly care home in Diwaniyah, Fian al-Mihna, says, “She reluctantly refused many requests and appeals regarding the reception of the disabled or those suffering from diseases requiring health care. The home is for rest, not for the care of the sick, given that most of the elderly who sought refuge in the home were survivors of violence. Their children or suffering from loneliness and severe neglect, or people find them taking over the streets and calling us. "
Vian Al-Mihna says that many of the appeals she received are aimed at helping elderly people take over the street (Al-Jazeera)
Insufficient services
The home's employees "voluntarily" provide some health services to the elderly residents when needed. The home suffers from a lack of service employees in the same way as the rest of the government offices, which causes the employees sometimes to perform some of these services, although the law requires the provision of recreational services, cultural activities and work opportunities for those who are able to. The elderly do not get any of that, but the home has a social worker to provide the necessary support.
Human rights activist Bahaa Al-Obeidi says, "Repeated scenes and cannot be described at all. I often receive appeals on my Facebook page to help elderly people dominate the street, so I rush to the address, and I am shocked by reality."
He added, "Most of these cases are from the category of elderly women, and some of them refuse to go to the shelters, and prefer to wait in the street in the hope that those who defrauded them will return." "Most of the children lie to their elderly relatives and ask them to wait in the street, then leave them without return."
Despite the responsibility and difficulty that Al-Obaidi and his companions face in persuading the elderly to leave the home for the elderly, he was able to provide assistance to a number of them, and sometimes he requested the security forces' assistance.
Al-Obaidi called for the launch of community events that have direct contact with the elderly to alleviate their suffering (Al-Jazeera)
Causes of the problem
Social researcher Ibtisam Nehme believes that the increase in inhuman social problems, including disobedience and abandonment of parents, or their abandonment and violence.
It is due to several reasons, most notably the absence of religious and moral faith, the absence of a sense of responsibility, the difficult living conditions of the children and their preoccupation with working away from the care of parents, or the financial independence of the children may be one of the reasons, as well as the spread of drugs and intoxicants and family disintegration with its many causes.
Nehme points out that the elderly, sick, disabled, suffering from limb tremors, amnesia, and similar situations are the group most exposed to violence in all its forms, and are often subjected to abuse after the death of a husband / wife, explaining that the elderly inside their homes face daily various types of violence, and these practices increased during the health curfew period after Corona epidemic.
Despite the presence of many civil society organizations, volunteer teams and international organizations in Iraq, support programs for the elderly are still weak, or almost non-existent compared to what these bodies provide to other groups of society, and they do not pay attention to reviving activities that strengthen family ties and care for the elderly. , Such as International Family Day and International Parents' Day.
Most of the entertainment programs that were provided by local organizations and volunteer teams for the elderly, who were forced not to leave their government offices, were also stopped, out of concern for them from the risk of infection with Corona, according to Vian Al-Mihna.
In this regard, Ebtisam Nehme calls for intensifying psychological and societal support programs for elderly people in government homes for the elderly by civil society organizations, with the support of international bodies.
For his part, human rights activist Bahaa Al-Obaidi called on humanitarian organizations to launch community activities that have direct contact with the elderly to alleviate their suffering and improve their lives, whether they are inside their homes or inside government offices, and this requires an effective international response that focuses on programs to protect the rights of the elderly and pushes towards Take care of them.