Dina is an Iraqi woman who was adopted by a couple who had been deprived of childbearing for several years from a shelter in Baghdad in 1980, and they took her to their home and considered her to be their daughter. Dina grew up in a large house that housed her parents' family, and one day when she was six years old, her father described her as a bastard while she was playing on the house phone and joking with him, without realizing what it meant at the time.
Dina, 49, says that her suffering began since that day, after everyone in the house called her a "bastard" during any banter or quarrel, and she went to her mother to tell her the meaning of this word.
Dina continues, "I did not live my childhood naturally, and the children of the family used to describe me with this name until after that it spread to neighbors and others, and I became rejected by everyone, young and old, without committing any sin, so the feeling of shame always followed me and I found pity only from my mother, and I became in some kind of conflict." Show the desire to play with my peers or avoid him so as not to hurt my feelings.
The phenomenon of unknown parentage increased after the wars, years of siege and crises that Iraq went through, and at the same time their suffering and social ostracism continued to pursue them throughout their lives due to the marginalization of those around them and the abuse of their dignity.
Oppression of society
Dina asserts that the feeling of shame continued with her throughout her childhood, and she hated school because it is a place that brings her together with the children of her relatives and neighbors who look at her with disgust, and because of them, even the school teachers know her story and look at her with compassion, "which forced me to leave school without completing primary school."
And she continues, saying: "I did not find normal dealings with me as a human being and as a person, but I felt that I was less than my peers and I did not know how to act except by silence or beating someone who intended to insult me or bully me, because the feeling of injustice is painful and pushed me to isolation and loneliness even though we are about 20 people living in a house." One, and I often find myself alone despite the love of my parents, but I hear hurtful words in the event of any disagreement with them, which is reflected in my behavior with others. "
Dina talks about her marriage, saying, "I got married 4 times and separated, and now I have 4 children. My childhood experiences were reflected in my reality and I carried many negative traits as a result of the violence and exclusion I faced. Although my parents spent all their money on me, and it caused their material losses for several years, I I do not regret anything, because what I faced because of them continued to haunt me even after I was over 40 years old. "
"After my father got sick, I lived with my mother, and after that my father's family refused us and did not even receive us to visit them. I do not forget their suspicious looks whenever I met them, and I still have that bastard girl in their eyes who does not honor them, and this worsened after my failure in my marriage, so I never felt belonging to me. A family really contained me, but I was just a child, and they found in it what met their needs, so I lived lost. "
Generous, descent
Children of unknown parentage are described as illegitimate children from forbidden sexual relations outside marriage, as a result of rape, or from a valid lineage, but their parents dispensed with them, so their lineage was not known.
In a positive step, the Child Welfare Authority of the Iraqi Ministry of Labor and Social Affairs decided in 2014 to call these people "generous lineage" instead of "of unknown parentage", to alleviate the harshness of the situation by losing the identity of the parents.
The presence of generous lineage increased in recent times who are left near garbage dumps or in the streets, mosques, or in shelters, and they are rarely contained as victims, and this is due to illegal relations outside marriage and the widespread phenomenon of family disintegration, divorce, the absence of religious faith and wrong use The Internet has a conservative society that does not tolerate mothers, so women are killed and an honor crime is considered if it is discovered, while the man is not held accountable for his mistake as part of a social culture, and the inferiority and social stigma continue to haunt them.
Family support
Similar to Dina, Maysa (61 years old) who lived a different experience as soon as her family kept the topic secret, and she says, “My mother provided full care for me throughout my childhood and spent on me throughout my education, and when I was in my teens she told me that I have unknown parentage, and that she took me since he was I was several days old, and she was careful not to know anyone, and I completed my education and got married and no one knew, and I did not dare to disclose this, and I had children, and I was keen to keep the secret, because I am sure that society will not accept me, and this will affect my family and ruin All the beautiful things in my life, although I am not guilty, but society looks down on all the unknown children. "
"I completed my education, obtained a university degree, became a successful mother, and I always have the respect and appreciation of society, because I imposed myself with my strength, kept my secret, and took care of the family that adopted me, and no one dared to open this aspect of my life," says Maysa.
Maysa added, "I did everything I could to be a successful and proud family, and neither my husband nor anyone knew about the unknown subject of my lineage, and no one ever called me an unknown parentage, rather I lived my life naturally, and all this did not and will not be achieved without my mother hiding the secret throughout our life." Because our environment is merciless and does not sympathize with the unknown family, even if it is a respectable family. "
Psychological impact
Psychological researcher, Dr. Noha Abdullah, stated that “Karim Al-Nasab suffers from a double identity crisis, because his personal and family identity is missing. He does not know anything about his parents, and therefore he does not know affiliation, at a time when we find his peers belonging to their fathers and proud of their affiliation with their families. He feels that he is standing on a soft and fragile ground. A person’s identity is a basic requirement for the individual, and when it is ambiguous, distorted, or unknown, it makes the psychological structure so.
The Iraqi researcher points out that "psychological research of unknown parentage shows that they have emotional disorders and violent behaviors such as theft, aggressive behavior and lack of assessment of the consequences, and these disorders have acquired genetic, innate and environmental causes, and the psychological atmosphere in which of unknown parentage arises from the beginning of pregnancy through birth conditions." The life of childhood and adolescence, and access to his dealings with life, often gives negative effects on his behavior.
For his part, the Islamic researcher at the College of Islamic Sciences, Dr. Faiq Al-Hamtani, points out that "the generous lineage in Islamic law has no sin, especially since Sharia urges morals, justice, freedom, rights, self-preservation, offspring and honor." And he adds, "Sharia honored the noble lineage and imposed That he enjoys the respect and appreciation of society, and rents those who sponsor him and makes him an orphan, and he urges to take care of him as an orphan because he has no fault in that. "
And parents visited
Commenting on this, the social researcher, Dr. Thaer Al-Ammar points out, "The Iraqi society holds the noble child of lineage and the burden of his parents, and looks upon him with contempt and inferiority, even though he is a victim of a wrong social policy, and failure to do so will lead to his deviation." Psychological, in an attempt to solve its problems, this category that families are unable to address, due to the lack of education among parents, to remedy their negative feelings and not translate it into actions that are not calculated between the sexes.
He considered that "social violence against generous lineage will act as a guide and sponsor to produce violence in them and turn them into time bombs or criminal and exploitation projects, and the feeling that the person is rejected is a stigma that reduces his honor and respect, and inevitably leads to his sliding into the path of revenge and harm as one of the defensive methods, to get rid of the negative feeling." Towards a community that does not feel a sense of belonging to it. "
As for the head of the Sumer Human Rights Organization, Ali Abbas Al-Waili, he believes that a person is born free, and any abuse or insult to his dignity is a clear violation of human rights, and this is a right referred to in the Iraqi constitution and approved by all international conventions on human rights, stressing his rejection of any violation of unknown lineage in Iraq.