If your child constantly ignores you when you hear the word "no", blame only yourself; You say that word a lot as a quick response to his requests when you are in a hurry or busy.
Over time, the word "no" - without any positive explanations or connections - can have some behavioral effects on children, such as feeling confused, angry, and frustrated.
Also, their repetition throughout the day loses their influence and meaning to them, and its saying to your child can be linked to bad actions, and produces unwanted adverse reactions.
If the children do not understand why I said "no", curiosity will motivate them to find this out by doing what they have forbidden, according to an article on the "Positing Parenting" website.
This does not mean avoiding direct refusal at all, but alternative and positive methods can be offered, and trying to encourage your child to think about other options. When he asks you to watch TV, instead of saying “no,” you can tell him “What if you help me make a cake or play together?” Providing alternative options makes him feel independent.
Yes, no
"The word loses its meaning a lot because of its repetition with our children, so when we repeat that this behavior is wrong and not appropriate, they become curious to do it and act on it, so that they know what is happening as a result of this error; when the mother says For her child, for example (do not eat this, because it tastes bad, "The child feels curious that drives him to try it on his own, as if facing a challenge that must be overcome."
Because the circumstances and pressures of life abounded on the mother, the word "no" was repeated without considering alternatives to it; A four-year-old child when he asks to cook with the stove as his mother does and insists on it, he is rejected for fear of the danger of fire and approaching the hot surface, while she can find alternatives that satisfy him the desire to experience cooking, such as buying a toy kitchen for him, or sharing it In preparing food without using the stove, or providing him with kitchen utensils to play alongside.
Failure to satisfy the mother's desire for her child causes him to try the matter himself without knowing it, which puts him at risk.
There is an educational rule that says, “If you can say yes, do not say no.” When your daughter came to you wearing inconsistent clothes and did not like you, and you were about to say “no, it is not appropriate,” you should think quickly about the impact of your words on her. To choose it may make her frustrated and distrustful, and then refuse to choose for herself, and make you choose instead. On the other side, you can say, "What do you think about this skirt or this dress?" To have a new choice.
This does not mean avoiding saying “no” at all and replacing it with “yes” to everything. Rather, there are alternative ways to get out of the spontaneous automatic “no” circle by thinking about the situation in a different way and finding suitable alternatives.
Be positive
When you tend to reject your child's request, try to paraphrase about what your child can do, not what they cannot do, according to the BabyCenter website.
For example, instead of saying "Don't play ball in the living room", you could say "Remember, just play ball outside".
Share the selection
Your child likes to feel independent and in control, and instead of rejection when asking to eat candy or a piece of chocolate, offer him a choice, for example, between grapes or apple slices.
Use dispersal agents
If your child caught something in the store while shopping, try to keep his eye on another thing: "What can we eat for lunch today?" Or "Should we take the elevator? Can you press the button?".
You can also ask for his help in shopping until he gets caught up in ordering toys or sweets, ask him to collect things from the shelves, or help you select items from your list, or move the cart.
Choose fights
Before saying “no,” ask yourself if what your child is doing is bad, affecting his safety or being blind to it? And let him enjoy jumping in a muddy pool on your way home without reprimanding, and if your daughter wants to wear her favorite dress before bed, what is the harm?
Share the feeling of adventure, fun and discovery whenever you can. If he's safe and nobody has hurt or bothered him, say "Yes".
Offer positive explanations
Positing Parenting advises explaining why in situations where alternative options are not available, if you can get your child to understand why he is not getting his application, they are unlikely to react negatively; If it is not appropriate to go out to the garden as he wanted, and make clear to him that the grandmother will visit you soon, and you can go to the garden later.
If using "no" to warn of danger, such as "please do not approach the oven," your phrase must be supported by an explanation that makes your child understand his danger, which will safely satisfy his curiosity. If your child is young and cannot easily grasp the matter, try using feelings to convey your objection. For example, instead of saying "You can't scream like that," say "screaming hurts my ears and makes me sad when you scream at me." This may take longer, but it is an ideal way to develop your child's understanding and sense of empathy.