Can you suddenly change your sexual orientation? In any case, this seems to be happening to Audrey, who has been attracted to women for a year. But for sexologist and psychoanalyst Catherine Blanc, if the change is proven, it is far from sudden. In "Sans Rendez-vous" this Thursday, she explains that the construction of an individual is done throughout life and that the 32-year-old woman probably repressed her attraction to the same gender in the first third of her life .
Audrey's question, 32
I have always been in a relationship with boys, but for a year, a year and a half, I have become more and more attracted to women. Can we become bisexual overnight?
Catherine Blanc's response
It is never all of a sudden. The construction of an individual is done throughout his life. The source is in her, she probably repressed it for multiple cultural reasons, education, or perhaps guilt. And this mechanism is not necessarily conscious. Besides, she could wonder about the way she worked with men: what was her role in her previous relationships? Because there are heterosexual couples whose roles are "reversed".
She can suddenly flee the masculine because she feels a need to go see something else, or find something that was written in her. But it can also be quite simply that the false image of itself has disintegrated through a new relationship.
>> Find all the sex questions in replay and podcast here
Audrey talks about attraction but not about sex, why?
I think that sometimes this idea of looking for a relationship with a woman is not always related to that of a sexual life with a woman. Often it is a way of moving towards tenderness of sweetness, rather in the order of a fraternal relationship. In the relation with the same sex, there can also be a search for oneself in the other and not only a history of sexuality.
Let's stop putting heterosexual, homosexual or bisexual labels! Behind these words there is not always sexuality: there can be other things that seek and boast of sexuality to act on it.
Audrey at 32, does this reflect previous family pressure?
Yes, you have couples who are heterosexual, who have children. Then suddenly they get divorced and the new partner happens to be of the same sex. Proof that it does not come out of nowhere. It was not disgust that caused the change, but rather a difficulty to fit into its genre. Thanks to the maturity acquired with age, she therefore allows herself this question on her relationship to the masculine.
Should she cross the course and try the experience?
If she wishes, she can tend towards that. But you should know that at any time, we can downgrade and say no finally, it's not my thing. It is not because one is committed towards the other that one is obliged to consume the relation or to be faithful to what the other imagines possible.