Perhaps, once, in an intense session with his partner , it suddenly happened that he received a good spanking in an instant of rage. Or perhaps, on occasion, he felt the uncontrollable desire to give his partner a good scourge and, in fact, he did. From this to being a habitual scourge, or to receive with some assiduity a few lashes in the booty - having incorporated the practice into their sexuality, after all - there is a stretch, it is true, a path that in the future lines is intended to analyze.
Why can it happen that we like a gesture that could be considered violent and that also relates to the idea of punishment? Often, when talking about spanking, it is equated to English discipline, to the stick with which in some schools, and until not long ago, it was given in the hand, or in other places, to those who misbehaved. "Today," explains sexologist Bruno Martínez , a member of the Sexological School, "is a term that has fallen into disuse and seems to have been replaced by the term spanking ."
Spank : whipping, hitting the hand on the ass or on the thighs or on the breasts and even on the face, or using a whip or a stick, who knows if a whip or something more domestic, such as a hairbrush with which to find the reverse. Martínez explains, too, that “like all love practices, the scourges have their own entity and, in addition, can be framed in other activities and practices. There are subjects who enjoy it for themselves and there are those who enjoy it accompanied by other types of practices of whatever type.
In conversation with Paper , a man who enjoys whipping precisely and who prefers to protect himself in anonymity explains exactly the same thing, that «spanking is a sexual practice in itself that, sometimes, is related to a more intense BDSM, like whips or chains". «The latter is not for me, I accept the relationship between spanking and domination / submission that entails instructing and sending someone to corner time , to wait and feel shame in an awkward position, before or after the punishment. But personally I do not like blood or severe marks. Spanking is the romantic thing about disciplining someone loved, the romance of discipline , love and discipline. Putting a girl in the red ass and having her exposed for a while in a corner is enough ».
The previous story coincides, also, with some of the reflections prepared by this sexologist Norma Ageitos, member of the State Association of Professionals of Sexology (AEPS): «Who has not given a whip or has given a whip ? (...) There are people who call themselves spankers ( spankers ) and spankees (whipped), whose taste lies in this practice and not so much in others. They even don't see themselves as part of the BDSM collective ».
That is to say, one can enjoy the scourges, or make enjoy with them, without being immersed in a relationship based on domination and submission; or yes. Relationships of roles, casual games or experiences that include even 24 hours a day, seven days a week. It is worth asking, in these times, what role does consent play here, especially when it comes to entering, always gradually, in this sexual practice that, for the time being, requires a lot of complicity.
Should we agree on everything before the first scourge or should we assess the role of spontaneity? The sexologist Bruno Martínez considers that «the logic of erotic encounters is the logic of the game and, in it, spontaneity plays a very important role. However, there are certain practices that, due to their nature and cultural background, deserve to be treated with some care.
Therefore, both Martinez and Ageitos insist that we "learn to look at each other" and even tell us , when we are simply chatting, what things we like, or would like to try. So that the time has come to bet on spontaneity, and who knows if for whipping, we have some certainty that the other will like it.
«I sincerely believe», Ageitos analyzes, «that we are a rather illiterate society in terms of erotic communication. We have trouble talking about what we want, what we would love and what we don't want to propose.
In case it works, here are some lines of those who already know what they like and enjoy it openly: «For me this is only valid as a game. It is even better if the girl pretends to protest and defends herself, but it could never make sense if she does not consider that she deserves punishment in some way. Perhaps he deserves it for being released, for shameless, for talking about more, for heavy, for impertinent or for unnerving my patience. If for her a punishment means pain, then it doesn't put me on and I don't want to play that.
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