On International Women's Day.. When do we appreciate the effort of housewives?

In a session that brought together women from different countries, my friend asked a question: What if I were a housewife?

I rest in my home, wake up at the time I choose, sleep whenever I want, and not be subjected to all these daily polemics at work.

We shared bemoans of ourselves as working women, and began to imagine the time we would spend strutting between the bed and the beauty salon, watching television only to be awakened by the voice of a woman who pulled us out of our rosy dreams telling us that she is a housewife, always eager to work, to escape the endless responsibilities of children, and the demands of her husband who makes Basically it has no business.

The voice of the husband who suddenly rose to scold the woman in the restaurant made me pay attention, the matter was that their son had dropped an empty glass and broke it!

The man continued to slander his wife despite the attention of everyone at the adjacent tables, and began enumerating her tasks that she had fallen short of during the past days.

 Profession is a housewife

She seemed angry at our previous perception, and continued her talk about the advantages of being a working woman, and she said, "You are lucky because you get out of the house every day, meet people outside the narrow family circle, breathe air that is not fragrant with the smell of cooking and washing, and shake your fingers to write on the computer keyboard instead of clear." dishes.

And she continued, “You can buy whatever clothes you want because you face the world daily, and you must be elegant. You get a fee that makes you independent and able to choose what you want. me as unemployed!"

She straightened up from her seat and looked at us, "Imagine with me that you go to work every day and at the end of the month you come back without a salary or thanks! Can you believe that the only party that did justice to me was the government, because it wrote to me in the profession field that I am a housewife!"

On that day, I realized angles that I had not crossed my mind before. Despite the efforts that a working mother suffers from inside and outside her home, she achieves other things in return for this effort.

It seems that the lady's speech is confirmed by scientific research.

In a study of the International Labor Organization in 142 countries, it included about 149,000 men and women;

She explained that 70% of women and 66% of men prefer a woman to have a paid job.

It is noteworthy that the percentage of 70% includes mostly women who are not currently working.

Thus, it seems that the desires of the worker to leave work and the non-worker to start it is a global idea and not exclusive to us.

Housewife with a Ph.D

In one of the meetings discussing books for a women's reading group, a woman impressed me with the way she presented the novel "The Midnight Library", which carries a deep philosophical idea about life.

She continued her speech with passion, citing dozens of books and ideas without interruption, and when she finished, I asked her: Where do you work?

She answered defiantly, "I don't work for a corporation. I am the head of my own household, giving my time and energy to those who deserve it."

I paused for a while, and began to blame myself for that question;

Who necessarily assumed that a woman, in order to be educated and influential, must be working!

Mrs. Shroudi noticed, and she took me back to her speech, saying, "I know that you expected me to tell you a doctor or a scientist, but my dear, the housewife does not have to be empty-minded and interested; there are thousands of women who have PhDs like me, and they chose to stay in their homes in order to build homes full of science and love." And without being closed off and immersed in the tasks of the house only, with respect to your role in life, but they are priorities.”

You are free at home

At a nearby table in a restaurant, a woman in her thirties sat with her husband and two sons.

One child is five years old and another is still in his first year.

Between feeding her younger one and following up on the needs of the older one, she couldn't eat, while her husband kept scrolling between his phone screen and the food items stacked on the table.

It looked like any normal family, except that the voice of the husband who suddenly rose to scold the woman made me pay attention, the matter was that their son had dropped an empty cup and broke it!

The man continued to berate his wife despite the attention of everyone at the adjacent tables, and began enumerating the tasks in which she had fallen short during the past days;

Once the youngest fell on his head, and another time the food was ruined by the flames of the stove, then he said, "You are without work all day, you do not make any contribution to the household expenses like the rest of the ladies, so why do you not strive to raise your children?"

I was very disturbed by the man's words. I looked at him angrily, and many of the restaurant's patrons did that, but he did not care. Rather, he was proud, as if he was showing off to others with his act. The woman suppressed her anger and disappointment and did not eat.

I looked for the psychological state of non-working mothers, as it is commonly believed that they are more comfortable, and therefore less stressed, but a study conducted by the American Gallup Center on about 60,000 American women;

She confirmed that non-working mothers with low incomes are exposed to depression and stress more than working mothers, and they are more prone to anger attacks and isolation.

Difficult choice: work or home?

The image of the wife leaving the restaurant did not leave me, and I remembered my friend who immigrated to a Western country, and decided, after 15 years of continuous work, to give up the idea to stay at home, even though her house was in dire need of money.

When I asked her: Why did you do that?

She said, "I lived half my life working, without thinking about many things (...) Here I have a choice, there are no harsh societal boundaries that we must follow, I felt that I could not work, I could no longer continue that continuous running between my multiple roles; A mother of two teenage boys and two young girls, a wife who is expected to take care of all the details of her home, husband and herself, and a skilled worker who excels in her field, all in alienation after alienation that absorbs my soul. psychologically and familially.”

She paused at her words, perhaps society gives several indications about the paths we should take, and we surrender to them without review. In some Arab societies, women's work is a necessity, and in others, their work is considered a defect and a deficiency.

Thus, the woman proceeds according to what is decreed around her, and not according to her need, ability, and circumstances.

Certainly, the challenges of a working mother are different from others, but she gets paid for her work, and often gets the encouragement of society and friends, in addition to the support of her family and husband, and perhaps everyone around her looks at her with amazement;

"This is a great woman who works, educates, cooks, and does not ask for help," as if it was a tribute to the woman's suffering because she chose to go out to work.

On International Women's Day, we ask: Why do our societies reduce the effort of housewives?

How can this short view be changed?

Which carries with it misconceptions?

And will the day come when those efforts are appreciated to go beyond writing the profession in the passport, so that we can deal with that lady who is between the responsibilities of her home as a working woman who has a role for which she deserves reward and salute?!