Solène Delinger 8:00 p.m., December 07, 2022

 "Johnny by Laeticia", the unpublished documentary made from intimate videos of the couple, shot by Laeticia, is broadcast Thursday evening on M6.

Interviewed on this occasion by our colleagues from "Parisien", the widow of Taulier confided in the impossible mourning of the one she called "her man". 

"I wanted to die, it hurt to die. I wanted to go with him...".

Five years after the death of Johnny, the father of her children, the love of her life, Laeticia Hallyday confides in her impossible mourning in the columns of

Parisian.

The mother of Jade and Joy had a lot of trouble getting up after the disappearance of her husband. 

“I will never be able to remarry”

"The most difficult part of this mourning is that I did not divorce Johnny, it was life that took it from me. I still wear my wedding ring, I will never be able to remarry", explains she asks the

 Parisian.

Since Johnny's death, Laeticia has brought her memory to life in different ways: she has thought and imagined a tribute exhibition to Johnny, which will arrive in Paris in January 2024, and she has also entrusted 700 hours of intimate videos of her and her spouse. for the production of the unpublished documentary

Johnny by Laeticia

, broadcast Thursday December 8 on M6. 

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A "spiritual ritual" at Johnny's grave

To "keep it alive", Laeticia also organizes vigils at the rocker's grave, in Saint-Barthélemy.

In 2017, after Johnny's disappearance, his wife found the strength to move forward by praying as regularly as possible at his grave.

"I was able to stay on the island for a month, I went there every day morning and evening. We started lighting candles and it became a spiritual ritual, a communion", she explains to the

Parisian

.

The widow of Taulier also reconsiders her decision to bury Johnny in Saint-Barthélemy.

"We were judged a lot on that, but it was his choice (…) But when they (

the fans, editor's note

) make this pilgrimage, they understand his choice and his love for this island". 

“I can no longer feel guilty about being in love”

If Laeticia Hallyday will probably never mourn Johnny, she has since found love in the arms of director Jalil Lespert.

“I can no longer feel guilty about being in love and happy”, assures the mother of Jade and Joy.

Jalil, meanwhile, "accepts his mourning and sometimes being in a threesome," says Laeticia, whose heart will always beat for Johnny...