Two years ago, after handing over the keys to the rental house at the subway station to my roommate, we said goodbye earnestly and wished each other the best of luck in the future.
You stay in Shanghai, I go back to my hometown, we all have a bright future.
Choosing to leave Shanghai was not a decision I made in an instant.
When I first came up with this idea, I asked myself a few questions: What kind of life do I want?
What are your expectations for future career development?
Can you accept the gap of returning to non-first-tier cities?
Platform, salary, richness of culture and entertainment... These are of course the factors that restrict my choice.
However, by coincidence, due to the impact of the epidemic, I had to work remotely in my hometown for a period of time, and found that my hometown has developed rapidly, and the various gaps that have entangled me in the past have also narrowed a lot.
As the only child in the family, my decision was naturally supported by my parents.
But ask yourself, it is not an easy task to make a choice that is truly true to yourself.
"Beijing, Shanghai, Guangzhou and Shenzhen" is an enviable label to a certain extent - "Where does the child go to work?" "Shanghai." "Shanghai is great! Big city." I often hear such conversations.
Struggle in a big city with a dream, "hard work will be successful" seems to be the promise of fate, and our life is also exciting and fulfilling.
In contrast, returning home is often regarded as the opposite of "chasing a dream", which means choosing comfort and stability, so it is called "escape" with a meaning of failure.
Under this discourse, China's geographical division seems to have only the extreme opposition between "first-line" and "non-first-line", which is a simple dichotomy between "center" and "periphery".
The individual living in it is difficult to be seen by the public.
The circumstances and self-needs of young people are obscured by labels. "In a big city", "good job" and "high salary" seem to be the criteria for happiness.
Everyone is running towards the same goal, following the planned route, it is difficult to escape and cannot help themselves.
Surrounded by the big environment, it is difficult for individuals not to be influenced by this one-dimensional view of success, and I was no exception in the past.
I was admitted to a prestigious university in Beijing, and then went to graduate school. Is it a queer talent when I go home?
I finally left my hometown, why did I come back?
Education in big cities is good, is it necessary to consider for the next generation?
Now that I am back in my hometown, I still hear these questioning voices from time to time.
In fact, between the different options, there is not much to argue about.
This matter of life is like drinking water, knowing whether it is cold or warm, and it is also full of besieged cities that "people outside want to go in, people inside want to come out".
Big cities are better than big cities. I don’t regret going to Shanghai as soon as I graduated. In this open metropolis, I feel the convenience of modernization and the possibility of diversity in life.
The title "Magic City" is very appropriate, as if everything is not rare here, and every uniqueness can be accommodated.
Choosing Shanghai, in addition to having a suitable job opportunity when I graduate, I also have the idea of "living here" that I planted when I visited Shanghai before.
As for whether it is suitable or not, you can only know if you have experienced it yourself.
On Douban, there is a group called "Bye bye first-tier cities". There is a sentence in the introduction - I believe that everyone can find their own habitat and life.
The group has three sections: "Life after Peach", "Peach Pear" and "Struggling in Place", where people at different stages share their own situations.
In fact, isn't the process of finding answers wonderful?
One of the top highlights in the group came from a netizen who traveled from Beijing to Chengdu to start a new life.
In the post, he summarized the process of the birth, implementation and implementation of the idea of why he chose Chengdu, including the process of settling in Chengdu, finding a job and buying a house, from the idea of leaving at the beginning to the real life in Chengdu, The whole process took nearly three years.
In the process, he became more and more aware of what he wanted and what the new city could give him.
I believe: where your heart is, where is your treasure.
Recently, at 7 o'clock in the evening on a weekday, I made an appointment with Faxiao to try a newly opened beef in sour soup.
In the long alley of the city, it is a fireworks gathering.
"Boss, do you have a seat?" "Yes, how many people are there?" When I returned to the provincial capital of my hometown, I spent more time with my friends. I remembered the dinner appointment I made with a friend who lived in another district of Shanghai. Finally left without eating.
I heard from my mother this week that the cherry blossoms by the river at home were blooming, so I booked a ticket to go home for the weekend.
The treasure that Paul Coelho wrote of the shepherd boy, who has been thinking about it day and night, and pursuing all his life, is nowhere else, but under the fig tree in the ruins of the church in his hometown.
Leaving a first-tier city is not a tragic story, nor does it need to be described as "escape".
On the other hand, staying in a first-tier city is not like what some people say, and you will be squeezed by work to the point of no life.
I think for ordinary people, the most important thing is always that what you want in your heart is in line with your current choices.
If you want to change, stay true to your heart and try.
The choices made after careful consideration and weighing of career, family and self are worth implementing step by step.
Looking back, I will tell the self who went to work in Shanghai after graduation: go experience it, there is nothing wrong with it.
And say to yourself who chose to return to your hometown, you are very brave, but this is just a new stop, and you don't need to set limits for yourself in the future.
Zhao Yusi Source: China Youth Daily