How can a full-time wife take care of a baby with peace of mind
reading tips
In recent years, many women have left the workplace and returned to their families as full-time wives.
How to provide protection for their rights and interests from the level of system design and judicial practice has received more and more attention.
"Open all year round", "lose their own development opportunities and the right to choose, have no life of their own", "disconnect with society and have no self-confidence"... The reporter learned that in recent years, many women have left the workplace and returned to their families as full-time wives .
However, stay-at-home wives are not popular with young women and are considered a "risky occupation".
status quo
No one cares about children, financial pressure
Chen Juanlin (pseudonym), who was born in 1979, was an account-opening teller in a securities company in Shenzhen before she became a full-time wife.
"The eldest is a premature baby and his health is very poor. He took a year off from school while he was in kindergarten. Every day after get off work, I would hold him in line to see a Chinese medicine practitioner and give him moxibustion at night." Talking about the reasons for becoming a full-time wife, Chen Juanlin said There is no way. At first, the eldest needed someone to take care of him. Later, when he had a second child, he was even more inseparable.
"Every morning after getting up at 6 o'clock, start preparing breakfast, take the child to school at 7 o'clock, go home, clean up the breakfast dishes, and prepare lunch. Pick up the child from school at 11 o'clock, and take him to outdoor activities after lunch. At 2 p.m. I will send the children to school again, and start packing and tidying up when I get home. After 4 o'clock, the children will be out of school, and after they come back, they will help with their homework and start preparing dinner..." This is "every day" after Chen Juanlin became a full-time wife.
Economic pressure is Chen Juanlin's biggest worry.
She told reporters that over the years, she had almost no personal consumption, no jewelry or cosmetics.
The family basically has no savings, and the most hope is to be stable and unable to withstand any changes.
Similar to Chen Juanlin, Wu Xi (pseudonym), who was born in 1997, also left her job as a full-time wife because her children were not taken care of.
"I can't do anything either. I ask my mother-in-law to take care of the baby. No one at home is worried. I will have a second child in the next two years. I plan to go to work after the second child goes to kindergarten."
Wu Xi's biggest worry is "not being understood", "Washing, cooking, cleaning, all day and night around rice, oil, salt, diapers, and no life of her own, but in the end, she said - Bringing children at home can help. How tiring, and I don’t have to make money to support my family!” She said that since she had a baby, she felt like she went to work 24/7, complained to her husband, and was thought to be looking for trouble.
worry
It is difficult to return to the workplace after being disconnected from society
Unconfident and low self-esteem are Chen Juanlin's evaluation of herself.
During the interview, she repeatedly emphasized that "I don't know what to do, I'm like a useless person".
"When I'm older and my education is not high, I really don't know what I can do. I'm very confused." Chen Juanlin told the "Worker Daily" reporter that after her child went to school, she tried to find a job many times, but she repeatedly ran into obstacles.
In her opinion, the main reason is that she has been out of the workplace for too long, she has not "kept charging", her education is not high, she is inexperienced, and she has no advantage in competing for positions with young people with high education.
What Chen Juanlin was worried about was exactly what Wu Xi's mother was worried about.
Because of whether or not to work, Wu Xi and her mother had many quarrels during maternity leave.
Due to the favorable economic conditions of her husband's family, Wu Xi has no financial burden, but her mother believes that young people should rely on themselves, at least they must be able to earn money to support themselves.
"Mom is worried that I will look for a job after giving birth to my second child. I have been out of the workplace for a long time, and I have no work experience, so it is difficult to find a job." Wu Xi bluntly said that she is also very contradictory. After a long time, it is too difficult to return to the workplace.
Wu Xi felt that another reason why her mother insisted on letting her go out to find a job was that she was worried that if the marriage changed, she would not be able to support herself.
"After all, no couple can guarantee a good life." She said that she has no savings or income, and her family's assets are all pre-marital property. If something goes wrong, they will be very passive, and there is no advantage in fighting for child custody alone. .
Being out of touch with society, it is difficult to return to the workplace, and finding a job is difficult to find... In the eyes of many women, a full-time wife is a "high-risk occupation".
Assure
Divorce gives housework compensation to maintain the ability to return to the workplace
In recent years, in divorce cases, many full-time wives' demands for housework compensation have been supported.
The "Civil Code" breaks the original "Marriage Law" that the application of the compensation system for housework labor needs to meet the preconditions of the husband and wife's separate property system, and confirms the independent value of housework labor from the legislation. Claiming compensation for housework removes a legal hurdle.
After five years of marriage, Liang Le and Li Fang (both pseudonyms), who had a daughter after their marriage, often had conflicts due to trivial life issues, and finally sued the court for divorce.
During the trial, Li Fang proposed that due to her pregnancy and taking care of her young children, she had not been working since her marriage, and asked Liang Le to pay her 20,000 yuan in compensation for housework.
The court held that the relationship between Liang Le and Li Fang had indeed broken down, and there was no possibility of reconciliation, and they agreed to divorce.
However, after Li Fang got married, she took on more family obligations due to pregnancy and child rearing, and she did not continue to work and had no economic income. Liang Le should give appropriate compensation.
Considering the duration of the marriage relationship between the two parties, the time of separation, and Liang Le's income, it was decided that Liang Le should pay Li Fang a one-time compensation of 10,000 yuan for housework.
"The focus of the dispute is that the amount of compensation is too low." Zhang Aidong, a lawyer from Guangdong Yaowen Law Firm, said that regarding the compensation system for housework in the Civil Code, from the perspective of legislative purposes, compensation is not an evaluation of the value of the contribution to labor itself, but is actually a A guide of values with a strong flavor of spiritual encouragement.
Zhang Aidong believes that when faced with a divorce, the proportion of full-time wives who can really take up legal weapons to defend their rights is not high.
After being out of the workplace for a long time, they often have a sense of fear about the future and do not know much about their husband's property status.
"Judicial practice should strengthen the property declaration system for divorce cases. In practice, property declarations often do not have strong enforcement power, and even many courts do not require declarations, which makes it easy for property to be concealed."
"The law has paid attention to the protection of the rights and interests of full-time wives, but the overall regulations are relatively few." Shen Jianfeng, dean of the Law School of China Institute of Labor Relations, bluntly said that "labor protection-type wives" is not a feasible proposal.
Allowing employers to bear additional costs through the mechanism of labor law and social insurance law may lead to difficulties for full-time women to re-enter the workplace, such as the accumulation of working years. Working hours are also counted as seniority, which will lead to greater exclusion of women from the labor market.
In addition, the boundaries between full-time parenting and home recuperation are sometimes uncertain, so there are technical problems.
"From the national level, the most direct way is to include these people in the protection scope of urban and rural residents' endowment insurance, which has basically been achieved; the social assistance law can also provide assistance for full-time wives who are in trouble." Shen Jianfeng believes that from the From the perspective of future system development, male and female employees who are raising children should be provided with longer parental leave subsidized by social insurance; from the perspective of encouraging childbirth and protecting the rights and interests of full-time wives, it is also possible to consider providing child-raising subsidies for women who are full-time because of childcare.
Liu Youting