68.2% of the surveyed unmarried young people have experienced "promotion of marriage and love"
80.6% of the surveyed unmarried young people admitted that being "prompted" increased the pressure of visiting relatives and friends during the Spring Festival
The Spring Festival of the Year of the Tiger has just passed, and many unmarried young people are urged to marry and love during the Spring Festival.
Some netizens lamented that "every festive season is urged to get married".
How do young people deal with marriage and lovemaking?
A few days ago, a survey of 2,021 unmarried young people conducted by the Social Survey Center of China Youth Daily and the questionnaire network (wenjuan.com) showed that 68.2% of the surveyed unmarried young people had experienced "propulsion for marriage and love".
80.6% of the surveyed unmarried young people admitted that being "prompted" increased the pressure of visiting relatives and friends during the Spring Festival.
In the face of urging marriage and love, 59.2% of the surveyed unmarried young people will change the topic and attention, and 53.0% of the surveyed unmarried young people will agree with whatever the other party says.
Among the surveyed unmarried young people, post-00s accounted for 17.7%, post-95s accounted for 39.8%, post-90s accounted for 32.0%, and post-85s accounted for 10.4%.
Men accounted for 40.6% and women accounted for 59.4%.
68.2% of the surveyed unmarried young people have experienced "promotion of marriage and love"
22-year-old Chen Ke (pseudonym) is a graduate student in a university in Tianjin and is now single.
During the New Year's dinner, I was always fascinated by relatives, "Everyone chatted while eating, and they would definitely ask me, 'Does Xiao Ke have a boyfriend?'" How old is this year, it's time to find a boyfriend '..." Chen Ke admitted that this is a topic that can never be avoided in chatting with relatives and friends.
Yu Qi (pseudonym), a 24-year-old single young man, introduced that during the Spring Festival holiday that just passed, he also experienced several "prompts", "My parents, seven aunts and eight aunts, all of them are mentioned. Everyone goes straight to the topic. , told me 'I am not too young, and I have to consider the issue of marriage and love'".
68.2% of the surveyed unmarried young people have experienced "promotion of marriage and love".
The interactive analysis found that the unmarried youth born in the 1990s had the highest proportion of being “prompted”, at 81.3%, followed by the post-95s generation (74.8%).
Men (73.6%) were "prompted" more than women (64.6%).
A related survey conducted by the Social Research Center in 2017 showed that 85.1% of unmarried young people of school age who were urged to marry by their elders accounted for 85.1%.
Today this proportion (68.2%) has dropped significantly.
Pan Yunkang, the former chief expert of the Tianjin Academy of Social Sciences and the president of the Tianjin Marriage and Family Research Association, said that when it comes to marriage and childbirth, a prominent manifestation is that young people are not in a hurry, while parents are anxious and constantly urging.
"This phenomenon reflects the difference in attitudes between the two generations. It is said that 'Men should get married, and women should get married'. In the minds of many Chinese parents, there is a set of procedures for raising children, giving birth, raising, educating, and starting a family. Only when children start a family and start a business. Only then will I feel relieved. I am also worried that my children will miss the opportunity.”
80.6% of the surveyed unmarried young people admitted that being "prompted" increased the pressure of visiting relatives and friends during the Spring Festival
Chen Ke said that every time he chatted with relatives, he would repeat the same topic, "I was 'prompted' to become the focus of everyone's conversation, and now I am a little numb. But the more times I talk, the mood will be affected to some extent."
Yu Qi said that he already felt "indifferent" to being "prompted". "I think I am still young now, and I am not in a hurry. If I were a few years older, the pressure and anxiety should increase a lot."
Chu Jie (pseudonym), a 29-year-old working in Beijing, is currently dating and has no plans to marry.
But every time she sees relatives, she has to be urged to marry, which makes her feel annoyed.
"I always feel that marriage and love are my own business, and I enjoy the current state of life. Everyone's urging is just to provide advice, showing that they care about me. But being urged to get married frequently makes me sometimes shake my decision, which leads to some thoughts, also upset."
80.6% of the surveyed unmarried young people admitted that being "prompted" increased the pressure of visiting relatives and friends during the Spring Festival.
The results of the interactive analysis showed that the post-90s unmarried group (85.0%) generally felt stressed, followed by the post-95s (84.0%).
In this survey, 32.8% of the surveyed unmarried young people pointed out that they are disgusted with the urging of their elders when it comes to the factors hindering making friends and getting married.
The daughter of Aunt Zhang, a retired resident of Tangshan, Hebei Province, is 32 years old this year and has never been a partner.
Compared to the past, Aunt Zhang's mentality has become much calmer in the past two years.
"It turned out to be really anxious. I talked to my daughter during the festivals. Our mothers often made troubles because of this, and the children were not happy when they came home. Later, I figured out that children and grandchildren have their own blessings, and elders should also be considerate of their children. Let it be."
"Today's young people have independent values and worldviews, and pursue self-reliance and self-reliance in life. Parents must understand their children, intervene or even decide their children's marriages strongly, and some contradictions will arise." Pan Yunkang believes that it is not wrong for parents to care about their children's marriages. But be careful, otherwise it may be counterproductive.
"You have to realize that you can't replace your children, you just need to remind them properly. Now some families are urging marriage so much that their children don't dare to go home."
59.2% of the surveyed unmarried young people will change the topic and attention in the face of urging marriage and love
In the face of urge to love, Chen Ke's method is to play "sloppy eyes" and divert everyone's attention through other things.
"I think this trick is very useful. For example, I will bring the topic to my study or the upcoming job search. Tell me about your study plan and future work plan, and everyone's attention will be quickly diverted." .
Yu Qi told reporters that when he was provoked, his solution was to reconcile a few words and put it off, "For example, 'You are all right, but I am still young and have no stable job', try Bailing. ".
Pan Yunkang suggested that parents should go with the flow and do not regard children's marriage and love issues, fertility issues, etc. as the primary topic of gatherings, otherwise it is easy to have adverse effects.
"As children, you should also understand your parents. And parents have more experience and are largely more experienced than young people, so there's no harm in listening to them."
What are your "Guidelines for Preventing Reminders"?
The survey shows that 59.2% of the surveyed unmarried young people will divert the topic and attention, 53.0% of the surveyed unmarried young people will agree with whatever the other party says, 44.8% of the surveyed unmarried young people will become very busy, 42.6% of the unmarried young people interviewed would pre-empt and ask each other with concern.
China Youth Daily, China Youth Daily reporter Du Yuanchun intern Wang Jiulong Source: China Youth Daily