In the 90s and 00s, TV series like Sex and the city paved the way for a cultural image of the single as someone who is independent, glamorous and prefers friends over family.
The trend fit well into the new sitcom climate where the gang of friends had begun to replace the nuclear family.
But in recent years' so-called Tinder novels, books such as Liv Strömquist's The Reddest Rose and the new season of Sex and the City show a much darker picture of the single.
"Intoxicating freedom"
Emma Engdahl is a professor of sociology at the University of Gothenburg and says that the way of dating has changed a lot in just the last ten years and that the cultural image we see has now emerged after a long time with seemingly endless possibilities.
- Sex and the city is really the typical example of the intoxication with freedom that the free relationship market gave us.
But when the first intoxication subsides, we also see the back of dating apps and dating sites, she says.
According to Emma Engdahl, the app-based dating has made the disappointment closer at hand.
Partly due to the discrepancy between image and reality and the fact that you can be rejected by many people in a very short time.
Describes the longing
One who has taken hold of that concept in culture is the author Amanda Romare, who has written the book Halva Malmö consists of guys who dumped me.
The main character Amanda gets hit again and again and never gets to a third date.
- You often see the dating market as the women's market, you should be a little distant the next day - a cool girl - (see fact box) but I do not recognize myself at all in that picture, she says.
Amanda Romare says that although she has read and heard a lot where women discuss sexuality and dating failures, she lacked a description of "forbidden" feelings - such as being obsessed with someone you barely know, or being sad about getting a no from someone you only met once.
– Jag gillar utvecklingen som har skett de senaste 25 åren att det först fanns en romantiserad bild – där det är okej att vara singel, distansera sig från män och bara ha kul, det tror jag var viktigt. Men nu kommer en annan typ av självständighet där man ärligt kan beskriva svårigheterna, längtan och hur ensamt det kan vara att vara singel, säger hon.