Should I get married while studying? At first glance, there are many reasons that speak against it. Parents and grandparents in particular like to make the following arguments: A wedding is a big life decision that should not be made lightly. When you marry, you are legally bound to your spouse for life and committed to providing for them. That is why it is important to stand on your own two feet financially. Traditionally, marriage should also serve the purpose of starting a family, which is why sooner or later children are expected from the couple. Therefore, from the point of view of many people, getting married while studying is too early for such an important step in life.
From a student perspective, too, there are aspects that could speak against it. The decision to commit to a single partner for the rest of your life is initially oppressive for many. Especially when you are studying as a time when you want to try out yourself, the thought of a wedding can make you fearful of missing out on something important in your love or student life. Getting married while in college can seem pretty stuffy. And even if you are absolutely determined to want to get married anyway, it can happen that you cannot find support for your decision from your own family or friends.
Why not enjoy student life and postpone planning for the future?
Most young German academic couples seem to think in this direction, because the trend has been moving for decades towards not getting married until their thirties, when they have completed their studies and, in the best case, their careers have already taken off.
Graphics from the statistics portal Statista show that the marriage age of couples has been rising steadily since 1991: While women were on average 26.1 years old when they got married in 1991, it was 32.1 years in 2020;
the average for men has increased from 28.5 to 34.6 years.
So getting married when you are over thirty is quite normal.
In view of all these arguments, it seems nonsensical to decide to get married while studying.
Courage and support
I decided to do it anyway - because there are many good reasons that speak for a wedding during my student days.
My husband and I decided to marry after four years of relationship, even though we roughly did not meet any of the social expectations of a wedding: We are still studying, do not have a high income and are not planning any children for the time being.
We don't want to settle down either, we want to travel a lot and move to Japan for a year.
Nevertheless, we wanted to get married while we were still studying because it means a lot to us personally.
At some point we just thought: why wait, if we're sure anyway?Keywords: