Say 3,000 "I miss you" and 4,000 "I'm sorry" every year. 43-year-old high-ranking paraplegic online shop owner opens the business of "Apologize and Represent White"
Gao Xinqi, an emotional messenger: I'm working with the fragile and sensitive emotions deep in everyone's heart
When contacting Gao Xinqi, he still responded to the concerns and greetings sent by netizens one by one in the online shop.
He said that many netizens came from Weibo and were attracted by the "unpopular business" of "emotional messenger". Many people cheered him up and cared about his daily life. Some even asked him whether to hire a part-time job. .
A few days ago, the hotly searched topic "43-year-old high-ranking paraplegic elder brother becomes a quarrelling couple's messenger" has attracted the attention of netizens, and the protagonist of the topic is Gao Xinqi.
He suffered a car accident at the age of 19, resulting in a high paraplegia disability, and was bedridden for many years.
Since 2005, Gao Xinqi has opened an online shop, selling accessories, clothing, mobile phones, cameras and other products. In three years, she earned 400,000 yuan and bought elevator rooms for her family.
And now, he has given up his business for many years and focuses on the online "apology and white" business.
"Good luck with one thread" is Gao Xinqi's online store reopened in 2018.
The shop layout is extremely simple, there are only three products, the average price is 5 yuan.
What's interesting is that the name of the customer service in the store is called "Wind, Rain and Phone."
Help send text messages for 5 yuan, call is 10 or 20 yuan, the price depends on the content of the message, some content like small essays, the price will be higher.
Nowadays, Gao Xinqi makes two or three hundred apology communication calls every month, and she says about 3,000 "I miss you" and 4,000 "I'm sorry" every year.
In the evaluation of the order, many people were relieved after passing the word, and many people thanked Gao Xinqi.
"It turns out that she has changed her number. Let's forget about it." "I know from others, she is about to get married, I wish happiness." "Thanks for helping to organize the language, the last effort is enough"...
In an interview with a reporter from Beijing Youth Daily, Gao Xinqi said that in this job, he often works with the most vulnerable and sensitive emotions in everyone's hearts.
Although the money is not much, it is quite meaningful to do this, at least to help others through yourself.
A sudden overturn
"Subverted my life"
"Adverse and accept" is Gao Xinqi's realization of her tragic experience.
In August 1998, 19-year-old Gao Xinqi suffered a car rollover on her way to Qinling, Shaanxi.
This sudden car accident caused him to lose consciousness below the chest and caused a high paraplegia.
At that time, he received the admission notice and had to give up the opportunity to study at the university and stayed in the hospital for more than a year.
"This car rollover really subverted my life. When the accident happened, I always wondered how it would be so unlucky and how such a situation would happen. I was very depressed and helpless, but it was always going to happen. Face reality. The doctor told me a lot of the actual situation, but I can only accept it because there is no choice." Gao Xinqi said.
After he was discharged from the hospital, he had nothing to do at home all day, so he bought a computer and started playing games to kill time.
Gradually, he lost interest in computer games.
Around 2005, Xinqi Gao began to pay attention to eBay, which was a popular website for trading items at the time.
"I think this is a way to make money. But my family and friends don't understand and don't know how to do business online. I always persuade them and let me try it." He recalled.
Gao Xinqi began to try to sell some books and small accessories on eBay. It didn't take long for Taobao to gradually enter people's lives, and he turned to Taobao.
Gao Xinqi first sold small accessories and clothing, and then began to call stores in Guangzhou and Shenzhen to mail some mobile phones, cameras and other digital products to him, and then resell them on Taobao to make a profit.
In three years, Gao Xinqi, through her own hard work, changed the family in debt due to car accidents, and bought a 400,000 elevator room for easy travel.
"At that time, the main energy and business methods of merchants were placed in physical stores. They felt that the Internet was unrealistic or difficult to operate. But in the next two or three years, everyone became familiar with the online platform, and more and more people adopted it. Online sales, and later factory direct sales, so my business is getting worse and less profitable," Gao Xinqi explained.
Gao Xinqi began to wonder if she could do some business that does not require import and delivery.
He found that many young people love to play games, and through games to meet new friends, and some slowly become lovers, and most of them are not in the same city.
Long-distance love can only convey feelings through games, WeChat, etc. However, when two people start to get angry, quarrel, or even break up, young people on impulsiveness will often choose to block or delete each other to cut off all contact.
Gao Xinqi thought that if one party could not get to the other party's city for objective reasons, he could only contact the other party through other means, and the link of passing the message was very important.
"Since there is an errand service offline, there can also be services such as intergenerational messaging online. You can make a phone call, send a text message, and charge a little less. It is a bridge between people."
Help spread a word
"There is actually this kind of service"
10 yuan is the first money he made this time by opening an online shop.
The first order Gao Xinqi received came a bit late, and the online store has been open for more than half a month, and no one has been interested.
Until one day, a boy suddenly contacted Gao Xinqi on the Internet and said anxiously: "We quarreled, can you help me tell her that I will be waiting for her downstairs at her house."
The boy bought flowers and gifts, worried that the girl’s parents were at home, and did not dare to rush to the door, and wanted Gao Xinqi to help send a message to the girl.
Gao Xinqi took the order and started calling the girl.
The girl was surprised when she answered the phone, and immediately asked who Gao Xinqi was.
"I said that I was a merchant who helped spread the word on Taobao, and I said the boy's name, and she went downstairs. The girl was very strange at the time, saying that there is still this kind of service? That order, I earned 10 yuan Money." Gao Xinqi recalled.
Under normal circumstances, if the buyer has no special requirements, Gao Xinqi will directly introduce herself as the merchant on Taobao.
The first reaction of most people was the same as that of this girl, very surprised.
And if the buyer makes a request, Gao Xinqi needs to hide her true identity.
A boy finds Gao Xinqi and tells that he and his girlfriend have quarreled, because they are in a long-distance relationship, and the girlfriend can't get in touch with her after being black.
The boy wrote a paragraph, which was conveyed to the girl by Gao Xinqi.
"I read a paragraph of nearly two hundred words to a girl. She asked me who I am, and I said I am a good friend of a boy. I said, your boyfriend is very anxious, and he has no choice but to let me give it to If you make a call, see if you can answer the call, or he will ask other friends to call you again. Everyone is in trouble. He does have something to say to you. "A few short sentences but the effect is good. After about a few hours, the boy happily told Gao Xinqi that they had reconciled.
In Gao Xinqi's view, doing this job is often working with the most vulnerable and sensitive emotions in everyone's heart.
Sometimes, he can feel the depression of the other party on the phone. A girl once said to Gao Xinqi while crying on the phone: "Thank you. But...you said, why can't two people who love each other be together?" Some couples who have broken up are still concerned about each other. When it is birthday, they hope to send a blessing, sing a song through Gao Xinqi, or read a written passage to the other party.
Gao Xinqi feels more and more that although she does not make much money, it makes sense to do this. At least she can help others by herself.
Until now, Gao Xinqi clearly remembered a little thing that she had been helped by strangers.
That winter, Gao Xinqi was still hospitalized, and he was in a wheelchair basking in the open space of the hospital.
He sat for a long time, and even the sun went down.
At this time, a family member of an unfamiliar patient walked in front of him and said: "Now the sun is gone, do you want to push you back into the ward?" Gao Xinqi looked up at the cloudy sky, and when the sun disappeared, Let the stranger help push back to the ward.
"We are not in the same ward. I live on the eighth floor and his family lives on the second floor. He is really kind. This little thing always makes me feel helped and helped, and both can make both parties feel happy."
Friends acting as buyers
"Thank you for saying this with me so late"
Cooperating with acting is a common requirement when receiving orders.
Some buyers do not want to really trouble people around them to deal with emotional matters because of their emotions. Therefore, Gao Xinqi has played the roles of buyers' hairdressers, friends, classmates and so on.
In order to play the role provided by the buyer, Gao Xinqi must ask clearly the reason for the matter.
"I need to ask a lot of questions, such as what happened to the two and how long have they been together? How did they meet? What was the reason for the quarrel when they broke up last time, and what ugly things did they say during the quarrel? After telling me about the situation, one is that it won't be a gangbang, and the other is that I probably know how to say it." Gao Xinqi explained.
Gao Xinqi once received a 6-hour call order, chatting from 10 pm to 4 am, that was his longest communication.
The buyer was a middle-level leader of a company, and his girlfriend in the same company quarreled with him because of work problems.
As a leader, he wanted a bowl of water and peace, without causing controversy, but his girlfriend did not listen to any explanation from him, and had a conflict and separated.
The man had no choice but to find Gao Xinqi on Taobao, hoping to chat with Gao Xinqi to indirectly let his girlfriend know about his difficulties and troubles, and also wanted to find an outsider to help him see "I did it right," Still doing it wrong"?
This time, Gao Xinqi's role is set as a "college classmate in a brother unit".
The buyer and Gao Xinqi were talking while sending text messages, “I’m on the phone with the amplifier, you speak louder, and I speak louder. I and her are now separated by a wall. I hope she can hear me say this.” Several times in the middle. Because it was too late, Gao Xinqi wanted the man to rest earlier, but the helpless man replied: "You will chat with me for a while. I heard there is still movement in her room, and the number of steps on her mobile phone is still increasing. She hasn't slept yet, she should Still listening to us."
Gao Xinqi had to continue listening, listening to the man talking about how she started this job, how to meet his girlfriend, and also talked about the troubles of promotion, conflicts with girlfriends, and plans for the future... before each new session , He will also give Gao Xinqi an outline, let Gao Xinqi speak according to his thoughts.
At the end, he sent a message saying: "I will talk more about her, and you will help me to praise her."
Until four o'clock in the morning, his girlfriend suddenly opened the door and walked in. Gao Xinqi heard the female voice on the other end of the phone, "Hurry up and rest. You have to go to work tomorrow morning. It's almost dawn."
After hanging up the phone, Gao Xinqi received a message: "Thank you for speaking with me so late. She heard it all, thank you." Gao Xinqi remembered clearly, "I charged him 20 yuan for half an hour for the call. We called. In 6 hours, he finally transferred 300 yuan to me."
In fact, Gao Xinqi does not have an established library of words, nor does she have too much exposure to psychological knowledge.
He believes that everyone's situation is different, there is no standard answer, and experience is accumulated little by little.
When communicating as an intermediary, he will edit what he wants to say before making a call or sending a message, and then he will execute the plan after the other party confirms the plan.
Because outsiders don’t understand many things about two people together, they can’t just make judgments just through some simple text introductions.
Point out the crux of the problem
"Say more, just convey one sentence, it's better not to say it"
Communication failure is also common.
"Sometimes there are situations where a girl just hangs up the phone as soon as she hears a boy's name. This shows that the girl doesn't want to give the boy any more chances, and doesn't want to hear what he said. Sometimes the other party will say something too. If you are very resolute, for example, don’t let him call again, it will be impossible for the two of us... In fact, when one party tells a third party, there must be a big problem between two people, even the relationship is fast. It's the end." Gao Xinqi said.
Not long ago, Gao Xinqi received an order from a girl about 20 years old.
After quarreling with her boyfriend, she broke up and wanted Gao Xinqi to help make peace as her cousin.
But every time after they made peace, they quarreled again, and she came to Gao Xinqi for help again, "Brother, can you help me again? I really can't live without him." Within half a month, she looked for Gao Xinqi 4 times. .
She told Gao Xinqi the story between the two and the problems that occurred, and Gao Xinqi would also help her analyze where the problem was.
However, Gao Xinqi has been in contact for a long time, and the boys are more determined.
Finally, Gao Xinqi persuaded her to "stop placing orders and spend the wrong money", and helped her contact the boys so that the boys could meet the girls again and speak clearly in person.
"My thought has always been that if there is a misunderstanding between the two sides of the incident, it is best to resolve it. After all, the words are not clear and the casserole is not missed. If it is not a misunderstanding, we may indeed be unable to help. We are just matchmaking. The decision has to be made by the parties themselves." Gao Xinqi said with emotion.
Many people found Gao Xinqi and asked him if he could help pass a message, but the content was only a very simple sentence, "×××, can you call me back?" Gao Xinqi was helpless, he said to the buyer, "That’s it. One sentence? Say more. If there is only this sentence, it is better not to say it. It has no meaning at all. If you ask the other person to call back, the other person will come back immediately. Do you think the two of you are angry?" To convey the words, we must also remind the buyer and think of ways with the buyer, "I will tell them to say something that the other party is interested in, or directly point out the interest of the other party. Directly talk about important issues and things. Come out and solve it later."
In Gao Xinqi's view, most young people nowadays care more about their feelings emotionally.
Most buyers have been talking about the other party's reasons and how bad the other party is to them.
At this time, Gao Xinqi would say to them: "If you stand on the other side's point of view, what would you think?"
According to Gao Xinqi's many years of order-taking experience, most of the buyers who place orders are young people born in the 90s and 00s, and 80% of the orders are problems between couples, and 90% of them choose to black out.
Many of these are based on conflicts before marriage, such as wedding gifts, different places and other issues.
The remaining 20% are some daily messages. Gao Xinqi can make two or three hundred apology communication calls every month. Every year, she says about 3,000 "I miss you" and 4,000 "I'm sorry".
Today, online shop owner Gao Xinqi can receive about 1,000 orders every month, earning about 5,000 yuan.
Because of the different needs of customers, he also found female college students who were part-timers, who could play the roles of girlfriends and friends of female clients.
Now, Gao Xinqi has more than a dozen part-time jobs. In addition to the monthly share of the part-time job, he still has an income of about 3,000 yuan, plus a monthly subsidy for the disabled to support his current life.
"My mother and sister have both passed away, and I live with my father at the moment. My father thinks that I have a job now that I can earn a little bit, and he is also very supportive."
Gao Xinqi believes that dealing with other people's affairs on the Internet every day and listening to other people's confession is another level of confession for him.
"I only go downstairs a few times a year. Buyers are the window through which I understand the world and communicate with others. I can also get in touch with people in reality. To be selfish, I am able to pass on money while making money. My time. For the future, I don't have too many plans or ideas. I have limited physical conditions. It is already very satisfying for me to be able to do this on my own." Gao Xinqi said with emotion.
By Han Shirong, our reporter