I was just born, but at 18:24 on July 29th

High school boys went to the pharmacy every week and bought cosmetics with the money they earned from their part-time job.

This is to hide your skin tone.

At the time of the high school entrance examination, I heard voices saying "I'm sorry" and "I'm likely to become a criminal in the future."

Therefore, I wanted to hide my personality as much as possible.

I once thought that I would be sad, sad, and dead in the various circumstances that have plagued me.

As an adult, he has something to tell the children who are suffering now.

(NHK Sapporo Broadcasting Station Photographer Naoyuki Haramaki)

To doubt my existence

Film director Jun Narita was born in Aichi prefecture to a Filipino mother and a Japanese father.

He was a quiet and kind boy.

Mr. Narita did not have a family register because his father disappeared soon after he was born.

It is said that his father and grandfather were looking for a school that they could attend without a family register, and after the school was decided, they cried and were pleased to see Mr. Narita carrying a school bag on his back.

However, when school life began, a painful reality awaited.

"I'm gone, don't you know?" When

Narita-san was in elementary school, my friend's video game cassette was gone.

At that time, Mr. Narita was the first to be suspected by a friend's guardian.

Even if he was playing with his friends, he wasn't able to bring him home for some reason.

Mr. Narita didn't understand why only he was treated unreasonably, and he began to wonder if there was something wrong with him.

And I came to think that I was a person who shouldn't be there.

Atsushi Narita

"I was wondering what my existence was. I wasn't doing anything wrong, I was just born, I just existed. "

Mr. Narita, who got a family register when he was a junior high school student but lost confidence in his existence, began to want to start over in an environment where no one knew about himself.

And I wanted to go on to a high school away from my hometown.

High school entrance exam day.

Mr. Narita took a seat, mixed with the tension of the exam and the excitement of moving toward a new environment.

At that time, unforgettable words popped into my ears.

"Isn't he a foreigner?"

"

Isn't he a

kunai?"

"I think he's going to commit a crime in the future

."

When I entered the school, I felt strongly that I was being teased about how I looked.

Atsushi Narita

"I was called Obama because I had darker skin and shorter hair than people. Moreover, all grades from high 1 to high 3 called me that way. I thought I'd do my best once ... "

Mr. Narita came to accept that the unreasonable treatment he had received since he was little was due to his skin color and the fact that he was different from the people around him.

It was a shock.

Then I started to want to have the same skin color as the surroundings.

I went to the pharmacy almost every week and started to apply cosmetics to my skin.

However, I was made fun of that again.

I couldn't do anything about it, and my suffering increased.

In addition, there was a shocking event for Mr. Narita.

The father who raised him confessed that he was not his real father.

Mr. Narita was shocked that what he believed in was shaking from his feet, and he was even more worried about his existence.

Fear of standing in public

Still, Mr. Narita left hope for his career after graduating from high school.

I decided to go to a vocational school to study the video that I was interested in.

However, I faced an event that I had never thought of here.

My dad, who loved motorcycles, put up his favorite motorcycle for sale.

The Lehman shock reduced my income and made my life difficult.

"I can't want you to go to school. Let's get a job to help the household,"

said Narita, who gave up going to school and decided to graduate from high school and work at a local supermarket.

It was the path I chose to help my family, but it didn't work when I started working.

When I stood in front of people at the supermarket, I suddenly became scared.

I wonder if the customer might say something about my appearance.

When I hit the cash register, I was scared and couldn't make eye contact with the customers.

Mr. Narita couldn't stand it and crouched down in the middle of the cash register.

I even ran into the bathroom.

The feeling that I had accumulated in my heart since I was little, "I shouldn't be there," suddenly overflowed from my work, and I couldn't keep myself.

Just snuggle up

I gave up going on to school and it didn't work at work.

I couldn't talk to anyone and started to get stuck.

Gradually, I didn't understand the meaning of living and wanted to die.

He started walking around the city, wondering if there was a good place to commit suicide.

Atsushi Narita

"I thought I couldn't help living anymore. At that time, I had no hope anymore."

As these days continued, I came across a live performance on the street while walking in Nagoya city.

As Mr. Narita was vaguely watching the live performance without feelings, the man who was playing called out.

It was a man named Eriya Doi, a pastor of the church.

He sensed the unusual atmosphere of Mr. Narita and called out to him.

Mr. Doi just listened to me without encouraging Mr. Narita.

Mr. Narita felt an unprecedented sense of security that Mr. Doi was close to him.

And I was able to confide for the first time the suffering I had experienced in my life.

"You can leave Atsushi as it is." When

Mr. Doi said to Mr. Narita, Mr. Narita felt that others had acknowledged his existence for the first time.

"Let's stop thinking about dying,"

Narita-san began to look forward little by little.

Atsushi Narita

"I always listened to him and realized that this person approved my existence for the first time and that I could live myself."

Find hope to live in video production

Mr. Narita was invited by Mr. Doi to make a video for worship at the church.

When I was in high school, who was familiar with personal computers, Mr. Narita once made a 10-minute video to the music.

At that time, I suddenly remembered that I felt like I was recognized by the people around me.

After getting a job, Mr. Narita was inspired to make another video by an unexpected invitation in the days of despair.

In order to make the images played in the church more attractive, Mr. Narita self-taught video production skills such as 3DCG, motion graphics, and projection mapping.

Eventually, the video caught the attention of the people involved, and work requests such as corporate advertising videos began to come little by little.

In this way, Mr. Narita became independent as a film director.

Then I came across a song.

Thank you for being alive

The song "Thank you for living" was written by the Hokkaido rock band "Night de Light" to prevent suicide.

I sing a straightforward message to those who find it hard to live.

"Thank you for staying alive without saying anything until your heart overlaps with your heart."

Atsushi Narita

"I intuitively felt that I had to convey this. It's a very important thing, or it's a corona wreck, and I felt that it was very meaningful that this song was at this timing. is"

When Mr. Narita first heard the song, the song overlapped perfectly with his life, and I remembered the face of someone like Mr. Doi who was close to me.

Mr. Narita wanted to reach more people with this song.

At the request of "Hokkaido Life Phone", Mr. Narita decided to make a video that matches the song.

Mr. Narita was particular about making the video.

We asked people who had actual worries about life to perform, not actors or extras.

Some of the seven people who gathered had a past that suffered from bullying, power harassment, and family discord.

Mr. Narita thought that there was a message that could be conveyed only because he was a party.

The sitting woman is said to have suffered from friendships at school.

In the video, I drew the figures of people who gently snuggled up to women.

"You are not alone, there are always people who will be close to you,"

Narita-san put in a message in the video.

In March, when the video was released on the video posting site YouTube, many comments were received.

"We are also seeing many times. It is a good video. The song also does not try to push a nice. (Snip) back, without trying to change, I want to be a person that is needed to buckwheat"

"When will weak to any person I had it many times. I thought that if I had this video at that time, I might have recovered faster. "

A video that reaches people who have the same feelings

Atsushi Narita

"I'm not trying to change anything, I'm not saying strong words to anyone, I'm not approaching, I'm just next door. This video approves people, this video is one person If you become a person who can live

Looking at the comments received, Mr. Narita said that he felt that he had found the answer to the "question" he had been thinking about since he was little.

The answer to the question, "Why was I born?"

"Because I had a difficult experience, I can make a video that reaches people who have the same feelings. I want to spend my life working on it

.

"

499 people.

This is the number of elementary, junior high and high school students who died last year.

It is said that the number of telephone consultations from teens is increasing due to the corona sickness of "Hokkaido Life Phone", which responds to troubles over the phone.

In

the comments sent to the

"Someone is alive for someone"

video, I can't forget the words I interviewed.

"It's thanks to many people that I, who had no family register and didn't exist anywhere, have lived so far."

Mr. Narita is now a father, mother, friend, and colleague at work in various aspects of life. It is said that it has become possible to feel that many people besides Mr. Toi were close to him.

Like the message in Mr. Narita's video, I would like to live by being kind to each and every one of my family and friends.

Life Phone National Toll Free Number 0120-783-556

Sapporohosokyoku cameraman

belly band Naoyuki

2012. He joined

Aomori stations, incumbent through the Fukui stations

continue interviewed, such as Hokkaido Life Line of corona epidemic