After the left-behind girl fights against marriage
Report
The road from home to the town is about 4 kilometers, and the girl Wang Huiyi (pseudonym) has walked many times. Looking back on going to town to report her parents that day, she felt "very illusory."
On June 1 this year, in Yuntan Town, Gaozhou City, Maoming City, Guangdong Province, a clear summer day, big clouds pressed against the top of the mountain. 17-year-old Wang Huiyi used his father's electric bike to go out and play. The family is preparing for 20 tables of banquets, and plates of meat have been prepared, and the next day will be her "wedding".
Maoming is close to the sea, and to its northeast hinterland is Yuntan. The town is surrounded by mountains. Whether it's making up classes, going to the market, or going to Shenzhen by car, Wang Huiyi has to go through this road. Along the way, the rice fields are green and the mountains are full of smoke. This time, her destination is still the town.
Ten minutes later, she and a junior high school classmate met in town. After eating, the two came to the gate of the town government. Before it was time for work in the afternoon, they waited for a while under the sun and knocked on the door of the town women's federation.
The parents were forced to marry and the daughter was underage-this was what happened to Wang Huiyi, but her classmates said it.
When she told her classmates that she was reluctant to do this marriage, her classmates strongly opposed it and suggested that she go to the Women's Federation to report it. If the "wedding" was held as scheduled, this classmate should have been her "bridal of honor."
The incident progressed quickly. The Women's Federation found the justice office, the justice office found the village committee, and the village committee found Wang Huiyi's parents. The "wedding ceremony" was stopped this afternoon. According to the staff in charge of the Women’s Federation in Yuntan Town, after mediation at 6 or 7 o’clock that afternoon, both parents expressed respect for the freedom of marriage, cancelled the "wedding" matter, and signed a letter of commitment on the spot.
Regarding this ruined report, Wang Huiyi said, "I don't have feelings for my parents anymore, and I didn't think about the consequences."
Grandpa also supported her to retreat and study hard. Regarding this "marriage", he has searched through the Chinese calendar several times, but did not find a "good day".
"marry"
After the Spring Festival this year, Wang Huiyi met two blind dates under the arrangement of his mother. The first one was 25 years old and only met twice, and the second five times. In her opinion, the relationship with these two men, "It is not that I am in love with him, it is my parents who are talking with his parents."
The final "marriage" object was a 22-year-old man from a neighboring village. After reporting the incident, the other party pulled her into the "blacklist" of WeChat contacts.
According to Wang Huiyi's grandfather's recollection, the man did not say hello in advance when he first came home, but Wang Huiyi's parents were very happy. The other party brought a box of biscuits, a box of drinks, and candy. The husband’s parent introduced that the child had never been in a relationship and was timid.
The grandfather said that the man knew that the girl was under 18 years old, "maybe thinking about finding a wife to come back." He learned that the man lives at the foot of a nearby mountain, has a 7-seater car, and his family is in good condition. His profession is to drive "cargo lesbians" and he has prepared 9 wedding cars, two of which are trucks in the convoy.
Wang Huiyi never imagined how she would enter the marriage, but everything came suddenly. During that time, the man’s parents came every day and wanted to take her to "go shopping for clothes" and "we will buy you what you want."
The two also took "wedding photos", which remain in her mobile phone. In the photo, she had wheat-colored skin and her eyes were crescent-shaped when she laughed. She explained that it was all a wry smile. She escaped to get married, but was reluctant to delete the photos, "This is the first time someone has given me makeup and curled hair."
She said that the reason for agreeing to take the wedding photos was that a few aunts talked and persuaded for 4 hours, "I was so tired at the time and wanted to sleep, the best way is to agree immediately."
Wang Huiyi didn't want to "get married" in her heart. She believes that parents just use themselves to get the gift money. Grandpa calculated that the gift money given by the man was 34,000 yuan, including 10,000 yuan for gold ornaments, 1,000 yuan for clothes, 5,000 yuan for wedding wine, and various red envelopes.
The marriage was in vain, and the man requested a refund of all the gift money. In addition, he also claimed an additional 50,000 yuan for the processed pork, new house decorations, candlesticks, tables and chairs, tableware, and matchmaker red envelopes.
"I will pay for the pork you eat yourself?" Grandpa argued. Later, the other party changed the compensation for pork from 7,000 yuan to 3500 yuan. Including the lottery, they eventually paid the man more than 50,000 yuan.
One day after returning the betrothal gift, Wang Huiyi's grandfather had a big quarrel with her mother. According to his description, the daughter-in-law felt that he was protecting his granddaughter and making the incident so angry that he picked up the kettle and threw it on the dinner table. "It's all you! It's all you!"
He also raised the plastic chair and blamed his daughter-in-law for throwing the child out like rubbish, when his (man's) family was Li Ka-shing in Hong Kong.
This was the first time the two had a fierce dispute. Wang Huiyi's father stood by and said nothing. The kettle fell to the ground and the base broke.
Part-time job
Nowadays, it is rare for underage girls to "marry" in Yuntan Town. Local villagers said that the phenomenon of patriarchy and early marriage of girls is rare now, and boys and girls are treated as treasures.
The aunt who lives next door to her house said that two people in her family work part-time, and they can earn a few thousand yuan per month. There is not a large number of children and one daughter in the family. How can they not let her sister go to school?
There is no answer to this question for the time being-the reporter tried to call Wang Huiyi's parents, but failed to get through.
Her grandfather said that after the incident, her son and daughter-in-law went back to work in Shenzhen, and her grandson passed by. After that, their numbers could not be reached.
After the 2017 high school entrance examination, Wang Huiyi took his younger brother to Shenzhen to find his parents. As a result, she had two years of working life. Her parents assembled parts in a watch factory. In the summer vacation, she often went to the factory to "help". When the summer vacation was over, her brother was sent back to her hometown to go to school, but she continued to stay in the factory, "I guessed at that time, I should not be able to go to school anymore."
Wang Huiyi said that her grades in the high school entrance examination were very poor, and she dared not tell her parents that when school started, no one asked her to go back to school. Her aunt heard from her mother that she herself did not want to go to school anymore.
Grandpa reminded his granddaughter, "If you can go to school, come back to school." But he didn't know the process of applying for high school, and he didn't know whether his granddaughter could go there or where.
A vice principal of Yuntan Middle School told reporters that current students generally go to high school or vocational school after finishing junior high school. Even if they are going to work, they are encouraged to finish high school.
Wang Huiyi, who is 1.59 meters tall, started working as a female worker in a watch factory for two years. The mother concealed her age, and the 14-year-old girl became a screw on the assembly line of the workshop.
Assembling watch parts is a repetitive action, day after day. Whenever her fingers were about to grind out a cocoon, she would switch to another operation, with her thumb motionless, and the other fingers turning around. Working hours are from 7:45 am to 5 pm, with a two-hour break at noon. Sometimes working overtime will last until 10 o'clock in the evening, and this intensity makes her dizzy.
Wang Huiyi's mother is 39 years old this year. She saw that the workers in the workshop were about the same age as their mothers, all with white hair. "These people are not as fast as I am at work, but my mother always says I am slow."
She remembered that she didn't have a workstation, and she was working on the table where the machine was stacked, and her mother was only one or two meters away from her. In the evening, she returned to the dormitory and had nothing to say with the aunts who lived with her, so she could only play with her mobile phone for a while and chat with netizens.
The parents lived in a rented house. At the weekend, the factory canteen did not provide food, so they called her to the rental house.
She recalled that in the two years in Shenzhen, the most expensive thing her mother had bought for her was a black Hanfu, 145 yuan. Mom transferred the money to her, and she placed the order online. In a selfie in her phone, she braided her hair, dressed in Hanfu, and smiled happily.
For two years, she didn't know how much money she made, and the salary would go directly to her mother's card. She only knows that three people together can get 16,000 yuan a month. Every week, her mother would give her 100 yuan, and she would use the money to buy some snacks.
During peak business hours, she is most hungry for sleep. Without breakfast, you can sleep until 7:30 and go directly to the workshop.
She exaggerated: "At that time, the heartbeat alone took half of my strength, and I didn't have the strength to work."
She complained to her mother "too tired". But in her impression, adults would only say, "We can all do it, why can't you do it?"
By May 2019, Wang Huiyi decided not to work. She has planned to go to school again. Before talking about it, she struggled for a few days and rehearsed it many times in her heart, trying to be harder in front of her parents, "Because they talk with excitement, and I will cry when they speak."
According to Wang Huiyi's recollection, when she proposed this idea, her mother asked her, "Do you want to work here anymore? I will find another factory to do it for you." Wang Huiyi said, "I want to study." Mom scolded, and finally agreed: "If you don't like the life here, you can go back and play for a month."
After returning home, she enrolled in the town’s math and English cram school. Grandpa said that she went to the Gaozhou City Education Bureau alone, hoping that she could re-enter the school.
The aunt who sent her to make up classes felt that since she was going to study, she had to "take a serious attitude." She remembered that when the teacher asked everyone to hand in their mobile phones before class, Wang Huiyi hesitated to hand them in.
"Neither do I want to work nor go to school. If we teach her not to listen, then marry someone else's house and train her. It is understandable to get married," said the aunt.
Stay behind
After reporting the incident, with all efforts, Wang Huiyi returned to Yuntan Middle School, where he reviewed the status of the previous year and took the entrance examination for high school. Compared with 3 years ago, she went from the youngest student in the class to the oldest in the class.
Teacher Deng, the head teacher, could see that she loves to study and listens more seriously, but she is still introverted. "Three years have passed, she has grown up and matured a lot, and she has spoken close to an adult."
In the second high school entrance examination, she scored 482 points, which did not reach the score of Gaozhou ordinary high school, so she could only choose from high schools and vocational schools in neighboring towns. Grandpa wants her to go to ordinary high school, and then go to college.
This summer after the high school entrance examination, my aunt wanted her to do odd jobs and share the burden for her parents. "The rural people can only eat if they do it." Wang Huiyi wants to adjust her mentality and study hard.
When talking about her previous school career, her tone will become brisk, "I didn't study much at that time, and my grades were very good." She likes math and English. She was in the top class in the first year of junior high, but then relaxed her study. So far, all the textbooks and homework books from elementary school to junior high school are stacked in her room.
She has won many awards. Grandpa turned out the certificate of merit under the stacked calendar papers in the storage room. Grandpa said that at the end of 2017, when her father came home from Shenzhen, he took her certificate from the wall. Today, only the brother's certificate of merit hangs on the wall of the living room.
"He gave up on me." In Wang Huiyi's memory, his taciturn father once said something similar on the phone. Grandpa and father had a fight over her "marriage" on the phone. "Grandpa doesn't agree with me to'marry', so he agrees with me to'marry'." Wang Huiyi felt sad.
After that incident, Wang Huiyi's parents transferred 3,000 yuan to the village committee to use for their daughter's tuition.
The staff of the town women's federation heard a recording of the phone call from the village party secretary. During the call, Wang Huiyi's mother said that as long as her daughter is willing to ask her parents for money to study, they will do their best. But Wang Huiyi didn't believe it. After coordination, to show her sincerity, her mother first transferred a tuition fee.
The staff member believes: "The most important reason for conflicts in her family is communication."
Wang Huiyi's parents worked outside for many years, and only stayed a dozen days when they returned home during the Chinese New Year. Grandpa usually takes care of the children at home. The grandfather said that mother-daughter communication rarely occurs. “Her mother took her for a year after giving birth to her, and then passed it to her grandmother. She went out to work. Since (the child) went to kindergarten, I have been taking my granddaughter."
In an essay written in the sixth grade, Wang Huiyi described herself: "I am an ordinary girl with a bronzed face. It is difficult to find when stuck in a crowd." She mentioned that her hobby is computer. Games, reading and debating. She quoted Gorky: "I pounce on books as a hungry man pounces on bread."
In fact, there are no such things as becoming a member of Xinhua Bookstore and reading "Harry Potter" novels in the composition. But the teacher scored high marks. She smiled, "It should have been copied from the composition at the time."
In the same composition, an essay about her brother's naughty troubles got a low score. This is in line with her cognitive criteria: "The teacher likes to write positive and positive things, so that they can get high marks, and don't like negative and negative things."
She remembered that there was an assignment to write "Mother's Love". She doesn't know how to write. She turned it over as a paperwork, and someone wrote that her mother took her to travel, very happy. She wondered how other people could make up such a magical story. Isn't it only on TV? In the end she wrote nothing. She seldom goes out of the mountains, even in Shenzhen, she always wanders around in the old industrial area, "the ground there is dirty, and there is sewage everywhere." There is a lack of essay materials that can "get high marks" in her life experience.
"I can't think of it, nor dare to make up. I think I should lie and write that I live in a happy family." She said.
Wang Huiyi also said that before the first high school entrance examination, her mood was affected by her parents. "Because my mother always scolded me, once I was sad from eating and cursing to turning off the lights to sleep at night. At that time, I started to think, does she not love me?" She said, having been troubled by this problem all the time. There is not much test paper for the high school entrance examination, and many are empty. Now she regrets, "I was too naive at the time for such an important exam."
Her grandfather and teacher respectively confirmed that, when her parents called home, they rarely asked about their daughters, and they hardly contacted the teacher. This is a kind of "laissez-faire education". But he would ask his son if he listened and what his grades were.
Last month, Wang Huiyi secretly took a group of photos with her mobile phone. She hid in the corner of the living room on the second floor, watching her parents and younger brother sitting on a sofa from the viewfinder. The younger brother was cuddling next to her mother. His mother fed his younger brother water, and then he drank it after feeding, while his father played games next to her. "They look so happy."
Aunt said that her mother is actually very kind. She speculated that after Wang Huiyi had a younger brother, she saw that her mother took more care of her younger brother and was mentally unbalanced. Regarding this, Wang Huiyi denied, "I only learned about envy and jealousy three years ago. I didn't have this kind of emotion before, I just thought my brother was naughty."
On the evening of July 29, Wang Huiyi and his mother had a long WeChat chat. His daughter sent a text, and her mother answered her voice.
In this conversation, the daughter asked her mother, can she not be so fierce?
My mother replied: "You don't want so many reasons. Your parents are kind to you, so what if you lose a little? I have raised you for so many years, and you won't be able to pay it off for a lifetime."
Mother also told her: "Being a person, don't always think about being cared for so much by others. You have to become stronger."
Wang Huiyi remembered that once she caught a cold while working, she was very uncomfortable. She asked her mother, "Can I leave work an hour earlier tonight?" Her mother said to her, "Being a person must know how to persevere, not so weak." What she thought was : Is it strong to die on the job? If someone died in the post because of persistence, would you say he is strong or weak?
Grandpa also hopes that his granddaughter will become strong, and this strength is reflected in learning. He subscribes to newspapers for many years. In the past, he would hold a magnifying glass and read the newspaper with his granddaughter. "I want her to go to university, continue to study, and work harder."
Wang Huiyi also wants to study. She doesn't want to become uneducated in the future. She also wants to go to big cities.
In the village, this is an ordinary family. The house is medium to upper level, a four-story small building with white tiles. When the reporter visited, there was a newspaper from 3 years ago on the table in the living room. The upward side tells a story about reading to change destiny. Grandpa drew a wavy line at the end of the article. That is a sentence of the philosopher Russell: "Three simple but extremely strong passions dominate my life, that is the desire for love, the pursuit of knowledge, and the painful compassion for the suffering of the disadvantaged."
In this small building, the rooms on the first floor are equipped with a silver-gray Suzuki motorcycle, a carved dressing table, and a wardrobe matching the dressing table. The living room on the second floor also has a light brown sofa. The sofa is covered with a transparent plastic dust cover. They were purchased for only 3 months and cost about 16,000 yuan. They were originally the "dowry" of this escaped girl.
China Youth Daily·China Youth Daily reporter Zhang Yi Source: China Youth Daily