You must have seen this information passing: since the beginning of the confinement, the number of visits to pornographic sites has exploded. But during this period, some parents may worry about their children. This is the case of Béatrice, 47, mother of a 14-year-old adolescent. This Europe 1 listener wonders how to prevent her son from going to porn sites, and if she should talk to him about it. Sex therapist Catherine Blanc replied on Monday in the program Sans rendez-vous .
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The question of Beatrice, 47:
I am the mother of a 14 year old teenager, I am afraid that confinement will encourage him to venture onto pornographic sites. What should I do to prevent this from happening?
Catherine Blanc's answer:
"In usual times he already does that, but he goes to school, he sees his friends, what he does that he lets go of his sexual concerns. In usual times he goes surfing, asking questions right and left . The confinement can lead him to be more in interrogation and more in intellectual and physical excitement which leads him to fall on pornographic sites. "
Do boredom and isolation lead you to consume more pornography?
"When we are bored, we are not able to create something that is good. There is therefore a tendency to absorb information in a bulimic way. Pornography refers to what we cannot do, we is not an actor but simply a voyeur. It reinforces the depressive side of the individual, it never participated in making him grow in his personal sexual journey. It does not only concern adolescents but also adults. "
Why is our listener worried about it now?
"This is the question of a mother in general who has trouble knowing what is going on in this area. Pornography gives an idea of a sexuality that does not exist, since it is a montage, and this is a montage on adult sexuality. This pornography encloses the adolescent since he is not confronted with young people from his environment. So it is a question of mom who wonders because perhaps her son is withdrawn, or in the difficulty of communication with his friends. It is a question of mothers who know their children already closed and in relational difficulty. "
Access to smartphones or computers is easier, so there is more temptation to go to porn sites?
"There are times when we go around in circles and we are in frustration with the absence of others. And there we want to create a sexuality, so that our usual organization does not change. But that is to believe let sexuality come into a habit. Now, sexuality is not a habit, it's a wonderful accident that we create, an opportunity. So we can think of other things, like cleaning up, etc. "
What should this mom do, should she put parental controls on her or tell her about it?
"We cannot interfere too much in the sexuality of our children. On the other hand, it is up to us to make him reflect, in particular on the limits not to be exceeded. We can ask him if he has questions. depending on age, maybe there are time limits to set, and if we feel that there is an obsession maybe also limit WiFi. "
Can it also be an opportunity to talk about sex education?
"When a mom is alone with her son (s), it can be complicated to broach this subject, and ditto for a dad alone with his daughter."