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How can you explain what is happening on The Island of Temptations ? The Mediaset program has become in just five weeks the revelation program of the new television season. Few, much less in the chain, surely came to think of the success achieved by a program recorded in the month of June of last year , with protagonists of the Mediaset factory little known, and, above all, when in the beginning the program did not It was more than aired in Cuatro, without much relevance.
The boycott of the advertisers led Mediaset to cancel GH Duo and at home they decided to turn The Island of Temptations into a Survivors of Infidelity . Program in Cuatro, in Telecinco and the debate on Fridays to accommodate 10 deliveries that week after week have been harvesting stratospheric audience rates and, most surprisingly, talk to anyone who talks to everyone talks about The Island of The temptations
Why? Because The Island of Temptations not only shows five couples who want to test themselves by separating and tempting themselves in a heavenly environment. The island of temptations shows a part of the reality of infidelity , and not only of infidelity as it is known, that is, the carnal and nothing else, but the treatment that women have made of it and that made by women. men, and in which many stereotypes have fallen .
But is it true what has been seen on The Island of Temptations ? Apparently not far from reality as many might think given the comments that the program has unleashed every day of broadcast. Unfaithful women within a few hours of separating from their partners ; men who only think of doing nothing that might bother the other party; cynical women who, while sleeping with others, asked their partners for explanations for a dance , a hug or a simple conversation; men sunk and destroyed after the infidelity of their girls; Desperate men; contained men; unleashed women. Is this the reality beyond The island of temptations?
"Men and women are unfaithful alike"
"It is often said that men are more unfaithful, but a man only finds it very difficult to be unfaithful . Two people are needed. Men and women are unfaithful alike, " Christoph Kreamer , responsible for Ashley Madison in Europe, the world's leading dating portal for married people, with more than 60 million registered users since 2002 . If anyone knows about infidelity they are.
"The island is part of that change we are living on gender fluidity, but also on the different types of couples. Spain is the second most successful European country in Ashley Madison . The traditional model of marriage, monogamy is not working " The island of temptations shows that in sexuality there are things that are changing. The island of temptations is a mirror of those changes we have been talking about for years, but that show us that things are moving," explains Kreamer.
And it is not because the person who controls, say the infidelity business, says it, but the data also collects it. According to a study called Good Wife , only four out of every 10 unfaithful women in Spain feel satisfied with their marriage. That is, the infidelity of a woman, "as would be the case of Fani on the island of temptations, " says Lara Ferreiro , an expert psychologist in couples and sexuality therapies, responds in most cases to seek the novel, surprising 42.7% of Spanish infidels believe that sex with their lover is novel and surprising, and one in three believes that it encourages them to experiment more, as well as to fulfill their sexual fantasies. In short, to get out of the monotony .
"The study talks about more than 67% of women surveyed having low sexual satisfaction . If you have that lack you need to look for that outside. If you put the emotional part and there is a lack with the sexual one, it leads you to seek compensation. The majority considered that the emotional connection is very important and if they don't have it, they look for satisfaction, "says Ferreiro.
In search of orgasm
Indeed, in this study, 67.4% of respondents stated that most of the time they do not reach orgasm with their husband, 26.5% who feel emotionally satisfied, and, finally, that sex is another one of the determining factors in an infidelity . While before marriage 22.4% considered sex with their partner of 10, at present, however, only 1 in 10 Spanish infidels continues to consider it that way. The same does not happen with their lovers, with whom 38.5% consider sex with them as the best possible sex.
Is this the case of Fani or Andrea on The Island of Temptations ? Fani and Andrea have been the only two girls who have consummated their infidelity until the end. In fact, after a bonfire of confrontation with Christofer , Fani's partner, he decided to leave and break the relationship with her, who, far from leaving the program and leaving alone, chose to return with her "lover", Ruben . Was Fani looking for that sexual and emotional satisfaction Ferreiro talks about and studying?
"We must analyze what relationship there was previously between them. Fani represents the dominant part of the couple , the most winning profile. Andrea is the same. They are the ones who manage the relationship in psychological and emotional terms. They do not masculinize their partners enough and represent the role of more of a mother . That lack, that lack is what makes me need to cover some needs, "Ferreiro explains about Andrea and Fani's attitude on the island. In the case of Fani , the explanation, according to Ferreiro and Kreamer is a mixture of both ideas. On the one hand, a sexual lack and on the other an emotional lack .
"They are looking for sexual satisfaction that they do not have with their partner and new things, but also intimacy that they do not have in the daily routine. Children, work, worries. It is hard for us to take time for ourselves as a couple," explains the person in charge. of Ashley Madison in Europe.
Fani, on the target
Fani's infidelity and especially her attitude towards Christofer during her long-awaited face-to-face, but also during the fires in which Monica Naranjo simply showed her the images of him visibly sunk and touched by her partner's infidelity, have caused Fani to It has become the perfect target of criticism. His "grief is not eaten" or "is that I was looking for a man and Ruben is" , have been harshly criticized. However, Ferreiro believes that it is because women are judged harder than men.
For Crhistoph Kreamer that Fani has been unfaithful to Christofer does not mean that he does not love him: "Yes, you can be unfaithful and be in love. It depends on each relationship, but above all it is a two-person thing. You have to wonder why I did it and we must see if it is only sexual or there is an emotional connotation , which is something deeper. "
The miseries of Fani and Christofer, uncovered
"When you commit an infidelity there are two types of attitudes. There is that of the defense to defend you from what has happened. A much more defensive attitude - as could be the case of Fani - is justified by the emotional lacks with Christofer . And then there is that of guilt, which is probably what we see when he meets Christofer again - it will be this Thursday - or when all the couples meet again - tonight - he may collapse ... She on the island wanted to live her story with Rubén and I wasn't going to leave him, that's why he defends it that way, "Ferreiro reasons.
And, according to the Good Wife study, 96.6% of the infidels believe that women are judged harder than men . Has Fani been judged harder than if a man had committed infidelity? Or is it that Fani's attitude has collapsed certain stereotypes? Will Fani be able to feel guilty about what happened? Can Christofer forgive? For Ferreiro and Kraemer there are certain profiles that are meat of infidelity. There is, for example, "the anxious" , who would respond to Andrea's attitude on the island, and that "they are those people who are on a diet and want to eat a hamburger and can, but end up falling; and then there is the most meditated profile All the infidels agree with a series of characteristics, that they want new experiences, people very psychologically flexible, that they want to let go and that they don't want to give up anything. " In conclusion, Fani and Andrea.
Why is there so much difference between them and them?
Yes, both have been unfaithful to their partner, both in a matter of hours, both with more than reproachable attitudes regarding behavior with Christofer and Ishmael , even humiliating, but still meeting the standard that Ferreiro and Kreamer they point out, the differences between them are much more than what can unite them. "Andrea is an immature profile of a woman. She has no empathy for the other person," says Ferreiro, adding that "their relationship is asymmetrical in power."
"She exercises a lot of power over Ishmael, she is the leader of the relationship, she did not respect Ishmael. The primary reaction of someone who is in love when she discovers an infidelity is a Stephania like Christofer's , but Andrea , no. She compares with the other woman and she pretends to be in advantage. The power mechanism is activated again, "he explains.
And perhaps this is one of the reasons that explain the great difference they and they have shown on The Island of Temptations . "They have gone to cover a lack, while they have gone with other objectives. They will free themselves and they will overcome the mistakes they think they have in the couple, jealousy, insecurities ...", they point out.
Indeed, if something has surprised on The island of temptations it has been the chasm between their attitude and theirs. While most of them, with the exception of Susana and Adelina - this, according to Ferreiro, because she is in the first phase of the relationship, that of falling in love - have fallen into temptation to a greater or lesser extent, they, with the exception of Gonzalo , they have worried very little about meeting one of the single women and have preferred to base their passage through reality on desolation, grief and worry, demonstrating on more than one occasion the dependence they have on their partner, to which even They would forgive an infidelity.
"Each person is different when it comes to forgiving. There are two possible outcomes: immediately break or wonder why we have arrived here, because there is something that does not work in the couple. The important thing in a relationship is to talk. Sometimes we talk about certain wishes and your partner tells you no and one can be free to try those things without having to leave the couple. We have wrong partner expectations . My partner has to be my best friend, my best lover and my best everything, and I think that if we were more honest and talked more we would do better, "says the head of Europe for Ashley Madison.
Fani, Andrea and Fiama, the big lie of the island
In fact, according to the study The positive side of being unfaithful , made to users of the dating website, " infidelity can have a positive impact , not only on unfaithful people but even on their marriages." "For us to start an extramarital relationship does not mean destroying the marriage," explains Kreamer. "The benefits of having an affair , such as the release of stress, less marital tension or an improvement in sexual relations, positively affect the mental state of the person and change how he reacts and acts in front of his partner," he says.
It will be tonight when it is seen on The Island of Temptations if indeed the infidelity committed by Fani and Andrea will positively impact on the couple or suppose, as happened a few days ago with Christofer and Fani , the rupture of the relationship. It will be tonight when couples meet again, when Fiama faces jealousy, doubts and the supposed assembly devised by her and by Alex , and it will be tonight when Susana faces face to face with the reality that, according to her, does not I knew Gonzalo .
" Fani is cannon fodder of Ashley Madison. Andrea, also because she seeks pleasure, while Ishmael seeks revenge, which is a primary emotion whose function is action. Gonzalo , insecure. He is the type of person who seeks the infidelity to compensate for a secondary narcissism because I want to be flattered and I want to please. And Fiama , because she wants to live her sexuality. As her partner does not masculinize, she would look for a Joy, "concludes Ferreiro. In short, that most of them were cannon fodder to fall into temptation, they were cannon fodder of television success.
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