Sexual damage, then September 18 at 16:38
A woman in her 30s who suffered from sexual damage made a hashtag “After the Sexual Victim” on Twitter after the NHK program, and said, “Let's talk without having to rush, suffer, or worry” I called. The number of voices murmured with the same hashtag has already exceeded 17,000 and continues to increase. I went to hear the thoughts in the hashtag. (Saitama Broadcasting Station reporter Yoko Shinto / Director, NHK Global Media Service Yoko Tobita)
Sudden kiss from boss in 50s
Emiri (a pseudonym) who made the hashtag appeared in a white blouse and black pants style at the meeting place. He said he was unable to wear a skirt after the damage.
According to Emily, the damage occurred two years ago. The other party was a manager in his 50s at the dispatched workplace.
“I was a manager and wife. I was older than 20 years old and felt like a“ dad ”” (Emily)
Every time I met in the hallway or hot water room, he said, “I'd like to drink some next time.” Later, Emily participated in a drinking party with a female temporary employee. The men had several employees in addition to the section manager. I was forced to go and responded while thinking "Is this a person?"
After leaving the store, Emily was suddenly hugged and kissed by the section manager on the street. It seems that the employees who were watching nearby were just beating. The return was left alone, so I tried to walk away, but I was forced off my arms. He said, “I'm not going well with my wife, so I want to see them in the future.”
Memory of the past revived due to sexual damage
A few days passed without knowing what happened in the shock. Gradually, fear, anger and disgust appeared, and trembling and tears began to appear during work. And the hard memories so far have been revived one after another.
“When I was a teenager, I was able to put on the night road, put my hand in my skirt, and I was swallowed by seniors and had sex without consent.” Emiri said.
Professor Miyoko Nagae of Nihon Fukushi University, who is in charge of counseling at the Sexual Violence Relief Center Nikko Nayano Nagomi in Nagoya, says that it is not uncommon to recall memories of old sexual damage.
“I didn't forget what I didn't like. There are a lot of people who can't do anything because they triggered something.
The regret that is trampled as a person
The damage still continued. Another boss who knew the damage was approaching to become a friend. I thought it was rude to go out for a meal. On the way home, I was kissed and put my tongue in a deserted place.
“It was hardened by shock” (Emily)
He has also put his hand in his underwear.
“I told you to quit, but I tried to think that this happened in quick succession because I had a cause and I was bad.” (Mr. Emily)
Because I thought it was the only way to keep my daily life intact.
After that, he was invited to say, “I will tell the company about the first perpetrator. When I was taken to the hotel and said, “No”, I was screwed down with power and deprived of both resistance and energy.
“I didn't feel like I was in this world. It felt like it was transparent.” (Emily)
I appealed to the dispatcher for damage. The company was a subsidiary company. I was told that I was verbally aware of the perpetrator, but when I renewed the contract, I was told that there was no work I could introduce.
“I thought that I had a fault, but I thought that it would be okay to have such an unreasonable thing. The greatest regret of being trampled as a person. The damage may be for a moment. But the pain will last for a lifetime.”
Does drama not work?
Emily consulted police and lawyers about the damage because of regret. However, the police said that it was not threatened or took medicine, and that it was not possible to make an incident, and the damage report was not accepted.
One police officer said, “If there are two men and women in a closed room, there is no help for it to be favored. If a sudden kiss is cracked down, dramas and comics will not be possible.”
Attorneys often said that “the failure to resist would be a disadvantage in the trial”.
The two perpetrators talked about the money, but they learned through lawyers that they said, “I should have stopped doing this,” “If I can pay 300,000 yen without paying my wife.” . Emily was overwhelmed by the lack of guilt and eventually received no yen from either.
“I felt that I was a good person to be treated lightly. The thing that I thought was difficult was decided to be“ no ”by society” (Emily)
I can't go back to “Before Damage”
After the damage, I was caught up to the point where I could not get on the train. Even if I tried to go to work, I couldn't move because I just looked at a man who was close to the perpetrators in my 50s. After that, just by seeing a salaried worker at the station, feelings of fear and hatred began to rise. In order to suppress myself who was about to scream, I was cramped on the spot and I couldn't stop cold and sweat.
“I felt the pain of tightening my chest. Gradually the number of absentees and late arrivals increased, and the surroundings seemed to be a loose person with a crushing habit.”
After that, I worked for another company, but because I was terrified just by having a man nearby, I continued to work and repeatedly take leave.
When choosing clothes, there is a desire to wear gorgeous skirts and dresses, but the voice of the mind, “Is it possible to wear such clothes?”
Let someone speak out
From April, Emily began participating in the “Flower Demo” where victims and their supporters gather to appeal for the eradication of sexual violence.
Participants express their feelings of being close to the hearts of the victims by holding the flowers of their thoughts. He was encouraged by the people who stood up while having the same experience as me.
At that time, I read an article by Ms. Minori Miyasa on the close-up Hyundai + homepage, “Minna Plus”, where I was sexually affected by my boss.
“Many perpetrators do not know the suffering after being damaged”
Emily, who was shocked by the words of Ms. Miya who had been talking with the perpetrators, made a hashtag “After the sex victim” on July 17 and tweeted it on Twitter.
"I thought the reason why the perpetrators were not guilty was because they didn't know the suffering afterwards.
After the # sex victims
Emily first wrote her “# then”.
"Scaring to go out" "Unbelievable person" "Persons of the same gender and similar age as the perpetrator are subject to fear" "Locations that were damaged, areas and routes used by the other party are subject to fear I can't go to the whole city. "
Then, # spread one after another.
“I cannot accept that my body is a woman” “I continue to blame myself” “I couldn't wear short skirts and legs that I liked”
“It ’s hard for my daughter to wear a skirt”….
It was just sympathy. Many more messages were also received.
“I think this tag is really good. I want to think about the victim's afterward even if I ’m alone.” “I'm working hard while struggling ... Thank you for making the tag.”
“Perpetrators who are guilty of guilt”, “Society's recognition to treat sexual harassment and sexual damage as minor”
“I felt like I wanted to change it a little,” Emily said.
Sexual damage is an invisible wound, but serious damage that deprives self-esteem. “Despite my life being broken, it doesn't change my appearance. I think it would have been better if I was injured,” says Emily.
When asked, “What if you would speak to the perpetrator?” Emily replied.
"I want to tell you that what you are trying to do is to break people. I want as many people as possible to hear that thought. I think that's the meaning of my survival."
“Close-up Hyundai +” will continue to address the issue of sexual violence, and we will consider this issue while disseminating the background and information on the website “Thinking about positive sexual violence together”. Please send your feelings and opinions.
Everyone thinks about positive sexual violence