“Only mad dogs and Englishmen go out into the midday sun,” Noel Coward sang at one time. The same can be said about the British Conservatives, who have just been elected leader of the party, Boris Johnson.

His only rival was Jeremy Hunt - a man whose last name because of reservations so often sounded obscene, that for the whole country it turned into an obsession. By the way, he himself made those reservations: while visiting China, he said that he was married to a Japanese woman (despite the fact that his wife was Chinese)!

But you need to overheat under the noonday sun and definitely be an Englishman (and better still mad) in order to consider that Boris Johnson will solve the already critical British problems.

At five minutes, the new prime minister is a magnificent example of all the vices (and, what is there, one or two virtues) of the English elite of the highest class, moreover, personally he can very weakly claim to be English.

It’s a thought that you were born to rule, backed up by expensive education at Eton, the most aristocratic school in the world that gave Britain half of all the premiers, and Oxford. Unforced belief in racial and national superiority over foreigners, including the upstart Americans. Slightly retouched (after all, the situation obliges) contempt for compatriots who either look different or even speak differently.

In this regard, Boris Johnson is a return to the past: maybe not by the XIX century, as his assistant, Jacob Ries-Mogg, but certainly by the middle of the XX century. The then Prime Minister Harold Macmillan outwardly seemed a prim English aristocrat, puritan and slightly eccentric. The fact that over the years his wife had shared a box with his colleague in parliament, Sir Robert Boothby, did not seem to have dismissed the prime minister. We, too, but in those days to learn about it and could not.

Now, in a new era, Boris Johnson decided that puritanism could be neglected: he taught his horns to his colleagues, even threw cuckoos into their nests; in bed with her 31-year-old girlfriend. But otherwise - all the same. Johnson is (or gives himself) an eccentric representative of the English upper class and will expect that the British still have respect for such a type in the 21st century.

To be fair, Johnson is as colorful as his predecessor May was colorless.

He is quick-witted and resourceful (after all, it’s not just that they pay for studying at Eton), he is well-read and writes himself quite well (presumably, he has the most expensive newspaper columns in Britain). Like his hero Winston Churchill, he believes that the story will be gracious to him, because he intends to write it himself.

Do not take him and courage - a sort with which in the Crimean War, the British light cavalry was sent into a suicide attack on the Russian position near Balaklava. Johnson led the Tory campaign for secession from the European Union and, unlike the cavalrymen mentioned, became the winner.

After a series of horrific failures and humiliations, Johnson was back on his horse, and after all, he was followed by a train that you will not forget. Because of his carelessness in office matters in prison in Iran, which has been a citizen of the United Kingdom for many years now. And remember the defunct Johnson Bridge Garden in London! It cost taxpayers more than £ 37 million, but it never was - and never will be - built. Johnson personally insulted half the world: throwing unprintable remarks to the French and the Turks (although he himself was partly of Turkish blood), and in the years when he had dual British-American citizenship, he even declared that he did not want to happen in certain areas of New York for "high probability" otherwise "stumble upon Donald Trump." But since he did not write about this on Twitter, he can hope that President Trump did not hear his words.

Johnson showed his attitude to Muslims by comparing Muslim women with “mailboxes”. Good luck on your first tour of the Islamic world, Boris!

He used racist language and stereotypes, speaking of dark-skinned people as “Negroes with watermelon smiles” - he liked smiles, however. Good luck in Africa, Boris!

Like Harold Macmillan, Boris Johnson considers himself the missing brain of the American president and sees Britain as a sort of modern Greece as applied to modern Rome - the United States. A country of refined erudition and culture, firmly fastened to the rectum of American brute force.

The smartest fool of the Western world. Poor Boris, he does not understand that both empires have sunk into oblivion ...

The point of view of the author may not coincide with the position of the editorial board.