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I'm going to start with a painful warning: there is a thread in Forocoches called 'Flirting on New Year's Eve', so the topic that concerns us today has already been dealt with by gentlemen who believe that Oscar Mayer was president of the United States and that an STD is a brand of 'streetwear'. But let's continue, let's continue, because we trust that this matter has to be analysed in order to avoid starting the year with as many disappointments as migraines.

The last night of the year brings with it as many hopes and conditional verbs as aesthetic seasonings destined, let's not fool ourselves, not so much to attract good luck as to seduce. I don't know if fortune, seeing your red satin lingerie, is going to be on your side, but you are going to try to make that dress -with which the Glovo delivery man who usually sees you in a tracksuit would never recognize you- attract someone from the party. However, you will well know that it is common that precisely the night you flirt is the one in which you wear those flesh-colored microfiber panties, so sometimes I wonder if we are not calling for bad luck when we insist on wearing sexy underwear...

It is dangerous to take the bait of New Year's Eve in a 'clean slate' code, which are the closing of the year supposedly capable of erasing your previous mistakes, your dry nights and the sentimental dramas that you have been collecting for 12 months. Let's face it: your best night will probably be the one when Beyoncé takes you on stage or when you find a 50 euro bill, not the one in which you wear a Tezenis lingerie jumpsuit and have paid a sum comparable to the down payment on a mortgage to enter a typical nightclub.

Hopes, Drinking, and Terrible Decisions

There is a belief that the way you start the year will mark the future of your next experiences, so for many people, flirting is an obligation. The problem is that precisely that night there are many who have the same goal in mind, and although this idea might seem optimal, because it means that there is a greater chance that the night will end with a +1, we find that along with desire, anxiety and certain touches of desperation come into play in the formula. Two elements as unattractive as they are recommended when it comes to flirting (and even cooking a soufflé, of course). When we place too many hopes and desires in a certainly uncontrollable night, it is more possible to wake up, I don't know if with someone on the pillow next to us, but with some frustration and even disappointment, and if there is something more dangerous than cyanide, it is high expectations.

It is also not uncommon for those who enjoy the Chimes with friends to insist on kissing or giving a 'chaste' beak to one of their companions in the belief that in order to have a year full of affection, love and why deny it, sex, it is necessary to ensure that after the avalanche of grapes, there is room for a good morreo that serves as the first of the many that in theory (deluded!) are to come. It is the vineyard equivalent of those who, after toasting, support the glass, although we well know that no matter how much our glass of wine touches the table, that contact between the glass and the gastronomic operations center is not going to ensure us any kind of magic, neither sexual nor emotional.

New Year's Eve adds to these dangerous formulas full of (dangerous) hopes an endless number of high-proof drinks that make us feel sexier than we really are and that make us believe that our words are more coherent and fun than they are. Apart from babbling, and as much as alcohol disinhibits us when it comes to relationships and can strip the shy of some relational and social barriers, as soon as there are more toasts than necessary, sexual relations not only lose out, but it is more likely that risky practices come into play and... Who wants Day 1 to start not just with a hangover, but with gaps and regrets? In fact, a study launched by researchers at Texas Tech University published in the British Medical Journal reveals that the week after New Year's Eve, the sale of the morning-after pill skyrockets. Bad decisions 1- Happy New Year, 0...

And what can we say about the previous feast, which on so many occasions serves as a prelude to flirting. Indigestion, gas, gentlemen who wear button-down shirts to a burst of sneezing... Even if we have pampered our dress code, a large dinner can ruin any fantasy, and it is well known that having sex after having eaten excessively can lead to big headlines, but not exactly to memorable orgasms...

No special friends, no rush doomed to failure

"Flirting on New Year's Eve is as bad an idea as shopping on the first day of sales. All of us singles dress up trying to wear our best clothes, but deep down, we all know that we are not worth even half the price at which we have been reduced," journalist Carmen Raya tells YO DONA. "So, there we are all full of sequins, suits, smelling of cheap colognes of Christmas gifts desperately trying to find someone so we don't have to spend another New Year's Eve in clubs full of singles who don't even know what they want anymore. We're all drunk, we're all lying, we're all smiling falsely and we all know that we just want to start the year in someone else's bed to forget about that ex who just got married or become a father... In fact, a guy once told me on New Year's Eve 'from the age of 35 the clubs smell of desperation'. and Brumel, I might add," he says as a finishing touch to his non-religious-but-yes-disastrous experience.

I firmly believe that before jumping into New Year's Eve flirting, it is convenient to watch any Netflix dating reality show washed down by liters of alcohol, because that is when we are aware that the embarrassment is more present than poor Cupid, who we suppose that in such a panorama, he has also poured himself a drink and has left the room. By the way, another piece of advice: don't even think about going, under any circumstances, with a friend with the right to rub shoulders, because life is very bitch and the cherub loves arrows, even more, so it's possible that your fuck friend ends up going with someone else and you, making your night bitter. For his part, Alberto C, public relations (29 years old), confesses that although he has never flirted on New Year's Eve, he does not think it is such a despicable idea. "It's never happened to me. I think it's an enviable experience if it's with someone you like. To start the year like this and not ONLY in your bed, with a hangover from the ciborium and with an existential crisis worthy of the first scenes of Bridget Jones, instead...", she says. Dear Alberto: when you wake up with an existential crisis, a hangover and a new mistake on your back (or next to you), tell us.

Time management is essential

Another thing to keep in mind is that New Year's Eve demands a time management capacity worth mentioning. It is vital to enjoy the evening with friends, but if we have insisted on getting to know someone, it is essential to know how to distribute the time (help!) and measure the timings. Yes: those who use Excel have a much easier life than those of us who think that such a cockroach in Microsoft Office is the cyanide of computing. By the way: it's okay if you leave the party before closing. In fact, it's not at all sexy to have to wait in the cold to find a taxi with that stranger who is starting to wonder if when you started talking a few hours ago you already had your mascara in a place so far away from them...

Another fact: it's absolutely okay if you meet someone that night and don't go home with them. Swap phones, social media and go home thinking that day 1 can start it with your red lingerie on, with your lipstick without being so spread across your face that you seem to be paying homage to Ronald McDonald and above all, with your friends. Because I'm going to tell you one thing: there are thousands of nights and possible couples (or mistakes, as I call them because of -very bad- experience) many more than we think, but the last party of the year with friends does have a limited number of occasions... You never know if you'll close out 2024 with your pregnant close friend, your best friend in London, or, who knows, that person you gave the number to before taking the taxi at the party on the 1st of 2024 in the hope that maybe, this year they won't be hell-bent on giving you only lemons... In any case, at least give us some ibuprofen.

  • Couple relationships