"Do not get angry." How do we turn anger into positive energy?

If anger is out of your control, you are going through this anger, you need a new relationship with your emotions, a relationship that makes you lead these emotions, not the other way around, says Maria Araapakis. As theodore Rubin says, "feeling angry and expressing it in a healthy way is actually the opposite of madness." As Goethe says, "behavior is a mirror that reflects a person's image." As Jane Lindfield, in her book The Management of Anger, says, "No one is likely to be suffocated by habit and prejudice, and anger may be a positive force provided we express it with sensitivity and decisiveness." As Anne Skiff says, "The only person who does not feel the anger or anger is forced into him. The moment is someone who has no feelings or consciousness. " As Jill Lindfield says, "Anger is a dangerous thing, but not being angry when necessary may be more dangerous."

Stages of anger

When you feel angry, you are going through five stages: the beginning of anger, anger, anger, confusion, and apologies, as Tariq liked. At the beginning of anger, for example, you interpret the situation as if someone does not respond to you when you receive it, and anger increases when you interpret his lack of peace as his purpose. The intensity of the anger that you hated him and I was hit him because he hurt you, and then comes this stage to curse or hit, and then comes the stage of confusion and to be aware of what was issued from you, but you are not fully aware of the situation. And then comes the stage of apology by apologizing to him if you know for example that he replied to you peace, but you did not notice well or that his voice was dim, or that he does not hear and has a hearing problem begins the stage of confusion and then the stage of apology, by offering him an apology or compensate any Form.

How to manage the situation positively when angry

Avoid anger as much as possible, it is wise that does not enter the circle of anger from the foundation and so called management of the positive position, that you are from the first phase of anger out of his circle, that you do not enter the circle of origin, and by managing the positive attitude, It is said in the impact that seek your brother seventy Sorry, and to separate the person from his behavior is a creature of God's great separation between him and his behavior that is issued by the program, whether family or social, and when you do not enter the circle of anger, you avoid the stage of confusion and the stage of growing anger that almost Be destructive to the soul, so stay away from creditors You do not enter it at all. It was narrated that Abu Hurayrah (may Allaah be pleased with him) said that a man said to the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him): "Help me." He said: Do not get angry. Narrated by al-Bukhaari.

And the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: "If one of you is angry when he is standing up, let him sit down. If he is angry, let him lie down. Narrated by Abu Dawood. You can control your anger by managing your positive attitude.

Control behavior, ideas and feeling

A vicious cycle of anger is a circle that moves from idea to feeling to behavior, and you can get out of this circle by coming out of the link of idea and feeling, to change your mental image and your interpretations, or to get out of the link of feeling and behavior by changing your situation with the movement that You can do it. But you can not control it, but you can control your thoughts that make sense, or you can control your behavior that produces feeling, and the feeling may lead to more thoughts or behavior, but you can get out of the circle of anger by separating the connection of the idea Feeling or behavior associated with feeling.

Transform anger into a force for positive change

As Willem Deborah puts it in his book of anger, that in order for anger to turn into a force for positive change, you must plan the ten steps: hold a truce with your anger, make a bond with anger and love, select a sensitive Otark, and rub your story, be good at dealing with grief, As Victor Victor said, there is a separation between the effect and the response. You can fill it with three points: decision, choice and responsibility. No one can dictate your feelings unless you allow. So do it.

Control emotions by forgetting repressed pains

You can not change the past, but you can change the way you look at it, because abuse will not be anything unless you remember it, "says Gill Lindfield." You have to manage your anger, you have to unite and change your direction, control your fears, face the monster inside you and deal with the rubble of pent-up anger. , And learn to express feelings appropriately and brilliantly, and remember that you can control unless you get angry inside you, and try to find constructive channels for your anger.

It is right to be angry at injustice and inequality, but the way you manage and use anger is one of the hardest and longest lessons in life, says Basil Hom. As MacKay, Rogers and MacKay say stress is the fuel of anger but you can successfully deal with stress instead of getting angry, remember that coherence is the key to excellence.

Try to imagine the fruits that you will gain if you keep your calm, it will stimulate you to resist anger more than your fear will do if you lose your temper, and that keeping you calm makes you appear confident, confident and willing to be with them in most of their time, A quiet person is more capable of taking his rights.

As Daniel Gollman says, emotions have a strong presence in our lives and they need us to express them in a timely manner. But in the midst of our noisy life we ​​ignore them completely, so we are deeply aware of them. . As Spanish wisdom has it that self-knowledge is the beginning to correct it, greenhouses should clean their windows on a regular basis if they want to remain calm, as Jill Lindfield says in her book Keep Your Coolness, and anger is one of the reasons why the old emotional wounds that our souls store, So if you have the willingness to lose your calm, you must treat these wounds. As Louis Carroll says, the king went on, "I will never forget my words and my fears at that moment." The Queen will forget, but if you do not keep this memory alive in your mind.

Satisfaction with reality and discontent

As Henry Ford says, he can do things he thinks he can, and those who believe he can not. As Agatha Christie says, we all have strange habits, but we never realize that, and as Goethe says, the first thing we point out in privileged people is their ability to set boundaries. To keep my calm, I have to accept the things that can not be changed, have the courage to change the things I want to change, and have the wisdom that I can distinguish between the two, says Reinhold Niebuhr. As Gen. Bradley says, courage is the ability to act properly and perform correctly, even when fear is high. Do not get angry and give your positive attitude.